The Spiral Down (The Fall Up #2)(55)

My eyes bulged as my mouth fell open.

“Yeah.” He laughed without humor. “On top of that, I bought her an apartment when she wanted to move out of my place and gave her credit cards for whatever she wanted to buy. And yet, three years later, that million was gone. I have no f*cking clue where it went, but the resources that were meant to set her up for years, if not life, are completely tapped out. And I have no f*cking idea what to do about it.” His sad, blue eyes searched mine, but I held no answers. All I had to offer was comfort.

“Come here.” I gripped the back of his head and pulled his face into my neck. “We’ll figure it out.”

His shoulders shook as the emotions fought their way out. “I can’t give her any more money, Evan. It’s killing her. Every f*cking dollar, she pumps into her arms. She’s been through rehab four times. I can’t keep doing this with her. I’m killing her. Just being in her life, I’m killing her. But I can’t tell her no. I’m all she has…” His voice caught. “She’s all I have.”

“That’s not true,” I quickly said. “Not anymore.” Tipping his head back, I guided his gaze to mine. “You are not alone anymore, Henry. I swear to you I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”

“You will,” he whispered as though it were a promise.

“No, I’m not,” I said adamantly.

Even I was surprised by the ease with which it had left my tongue. There was no longer a fight—my mind and my body were both finally on board. The walls had crumbled and I was clambering over the wreckage with only him in my sights.

I was in it with Henry.

Plain and simple.

“I’m here,” I reiterated, needing him to understand how serious I was.

“For now. You can’t see it now, but if time has taught me anything, it’s that everything is temporary.”

“Not me. Not us. Jesus, Henry. I’ve been caught in your web since I first laid eyes on you. Yeah, I’ve been scared. But this thing with you was hard for me to accept. Maybe you were right. I needed some time to get used to it all. But it’s done now. It’s time for you to get used to the fact that I’m here to stay as long as you want me.” I pressed a hard kiss to his lips.

He closed his eyes and breathed in as if he were trying to inhale me.

I wanted that too, and seconds later, his exhale filled my lungs.

“You aren’t alone anymore. We’ll figure out Robin.” I kissed him again, this time opening my mouth and touching my tongue to his lips. “We’ll figure it all out.”

His mouth briefly opened with mine before I leaned away. “Evan,” he breathed, following me forward.

My cock thickened the way it always did when he said my name, but it was my mind that made me want to take it further. And it was the swell of my heart that made me want to take it all the way.

I slipped off the couch, settling on my knees and holding his gaze. “We’ll figure out how to get me in your bed on a tour bus after your shows.”

His mouth slacked open and his eyes heated. “Wha…what…”

I winked, shifting between his legs. “We’ll go to family dinner at Levee’s house anytime you want.” Gliding my hands up his thighs, I found him quickly thickening behind the denim. I paused at his button. “I’m not big on takeout, but I’ll cook dinner for you, and then we can watch whatever the hell movie you want on lazy Sundays.” I watched him intently as he remained frozen, but his breathing had begun to speed. “We’ll sit on whatever beach you want when you need to get away from it all.”

“What are you saying?” he finally asked on a whisper.

I smiled up at him as I pulled his zipper down. “I guess I’m saying I want it all too.”

Understanding morphed his face into something so beautiful, I knew I was done for. There would be no coming back from this. Not from Henry. And, for the first time, I was completely okay with that. No reservations.

I hadn’t even gotten his pants down when I felt his hand in my hair, urging me away. My eyes jumped to his as he suddenly stood off the couch.

“Be specific here. You want what?” he asked.

“Evan,” I corrected, and a sinister smile tipped one side of his mouth.

His grip in my hair tightened as he repeated, “You want what, Evan?”

“You. Every way I can have you.”

The weight of a decade floated from my shoulders, freeing me.

I was still on my knees when he bent down and brushed his lips across my mouth, hovering out of my reach so I couldn’t take it any deeper.

“There’s no going back from this, Evan.”

“I know.” I teased the waistband of his jeans.

He caught my hands to stop me. “You can’t wake up in the morning and ask the universe for a redo. I won’t be able to let go.”

“I don’t want a redo, so don’t let go.” I pressed up on my knees until I caught his lips.

It started out gentle, but it quickly progressed. Our lids never drifted closed as he dominated my mouth. However, it wasn’t confidence he was blinking back. Nor was it desire that made his hands shake as he fought to maintain his grip in my hair.

I wasn’t sure what was going on in his head at all, but I knew one way to make it stop.