The Slot (Rochester Riot #1)(35)
Eloise didn’t care for the angry turn the conversation had taken. Because it scared the living shit out of her. She shook her head and pushed forward.
“I had an abortion. My family never knew about it. Neither did Trevor. After the procedure, I contracted an infection, but I got over it. Then I moved out of state and buried myself in books. I came down with mono and missed a whole semester. That’s when my doctor told me there was bacterial scarring that might prevent me from having another baby. Ever.”
She wiped her eyes with the hem of the duvet cover and looked up at him. Cole’s face had gone ashen. “So now you know.”
He pulled her head into his chest and stroked her hair. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly. Neither of them spoke for several minutes. Cole’s gentle presence calmed her until she nearly fell asleep. “I should go,” he said suddenly, jarring her awake.
“You don’t have to. You could stay,” she said, snuggling into him again.
“You’re exhausted, and we’ve got practice tomorrow.” He disentangled himself and went in search of his clothes on the floor.
Eloise watched him dress, savoring the sight of his muscled, athletic physique. He fished his phone out of his jean pocket and tapped the screen. “My ride will be here in a few minutes,” Cole said, returning the device to his pocket. “I’ll wait downstairs.”
Eloise sat up and reached for her shortie robe that lay on a chair near the bed. “You can wait here, it’s fine.” She donned the robe and tied the belt around her waist. When she turned around, Cole stared at her in a distant, distracted way. “What’s wrong?” she asked, worry snaking through her.
He chewed his lip, then shook his head as if to clear stray thoughts from it. “It’s nothing. You should rest, I’ll see myself out.”
“Cole,” she said, her voice thrumming with uncertainty, “there’s something you’re not saying. Please, we have to be honest with each other.”
He bowed his head, then glanced up again. “I’m no altar boy,” he confessed. “But I come from a very devout Catholic home. I’m real sorry for what happened to you and furious with Trey, but…” he broke off and looked at the ceiling, avoiding her gaze. “Abortion is against everything I was raised to believe. Life is precious, it’s a gift, no matter how it arrives.”
“I was raped,” Eloise said, becoming angry. “That changes the holy precept just a little, doesn’t it?”
Cole looked uncomfortable, almost stricken, his face paler than earlier. “I’ve gotta go. Goodnight, Eloise.”
He turned and left the bedroom. Eloise slumped to sit on the edge of the bed, her knees suddenly unable to support her weight. She heard the rustle of clothing as he retrieved his shoes and jacket, and the hollow slam of the door as it closed behind him.
Then all she heard was her sobs.
Chapter Thirteen
Eloise could barely open her eyes the next morning, a thick crust of dried tears stuck them together. She rubbed at them with her fingertips, her whole face feeling swollen and misshapen from sobbing half the night. Memories of both joy and pain from the previous evening filtered into her waking brain. How did her life go from success and optimism to such total misery in just a handful of weeks? Men! They were the cause of everything bad, from wars to unwanted pregnancies.
Cole had said goodnight, but not goodbye. The look on his face as he’d left her bedroom would haunt her forever. A portrait of disappointment, lost faith, and helplessness. It had stabbed her to the core knowing she’d poured her heart out, revealed her innermost fears and secrets to him, and he’d just turned away. She hoped some thread of reason, of desire for her, remained and would bring him back to the real world. One that wasn’t full of idealistic rainbows, angels, and blessed virgins. Where bad people did bad things for their own selfish gain.
Her rationalizations didn’t make her feel any better. She grabbed her cell phone from her cream-colored Michael Kors handbag on the floor. It lay next to the discarded pile of clothing from the night before, and tears threatened to begin anew.
There were missed calls from Sophia and Kylie. She dialed Sophia first, chastising herself for not being available when her sister needed her. A trip to Columbus just wasn’t feasible with the team nearing the end of the regular season and vying for a playoff spot. She hoped Sophia would understand.
“Hi, El,” Sophia’s voice answered brightly.
“Hi, Soph, sorry I missed your call. So, did you get the test done? What happened?” Sophia’s tone of voice suggested good news. “I’ve been concerned since I didn’t get a text from you right away.”
“It’s negative. If these things are reliable, and if I did it right, it’s negative.”
Eloise sighed in relief. “Good. See? Told you not to worry until you were sure. These things can happen for lots of reasons. How’s Phil? Have you talked to him?”
Sophia paused. “A couple of times, but he decided to take a ski trip for a few days in Colorado. Hope that mile-high air will clear his head.” She sighed audibly.
“I’m sure it will, Soph. He loves you, you’ve been together so long. He just needs a little–”
“Don’t say time,” Sophia interrupted. “If I hear that phrase once more, I’m gonna puke. He’s had years of time.”