The Ripple Effect (Rhiannon's Law #3)(65)

Fuck.

“You might want to watch what you say,” Paine continued. “She not only takes your head, she forces your own words down your throat before you go. One by one, you eat them all. It’s a beautiful f*cking thing. I can’t wait for you to see it.”

“Is that a fact?”

“That’s a fact.”


Anton glanced over his shoulder, meeting Revenald’s gaze. “I grow weary of this one.”


“Mercy.” Disco’s hoarse plea pulled at my heart. “Show him mercy.”

“There is no such thing in my domain, Gabriel Trevellian. Consider that one of your many lessons this evening.” Revenald shrugged and glanced at Anton. “He’s sealed his fate. Do as you will.”

My heart was pounding, the world spinning. I started forward, but my feet were too f*cking slow. Time stopped but seemed to speed up at the same time, so that everything ticked in slow motion only to zip ahead in a flash. Paine wasn’t afraid when Anton returned his attention to him. I could see it in his glorious onyx eyes, the way he grinned.

“Go to Hell,” Paine said.

Then he looked at me, held my gaze, and smiled.

Such a simple thing, Paine’s smile, yet it was so damned luminous and rare it hurt. With a flick of his lips and a glimpse of his teeth, Paine went from terrifying to resplendent.

He’s saying goodbye.

My stomach dropped to my knees at the thought, my heart throbbing a tattoo in my chest, so hard I thought it might burst. I didn’t stop advancing, intent on Paine and only Paine. It was so perverse, giving Paine what he always wanted now when he couldn’t enjoy it. For the first time, there was no Disco. There was only the two of us—Paine and me.

“You first,” Anton hissed.

My mind refused to believe what my eyes witnessed as I screamed, my own shrill outburst ringing in my ears, a long, endless drone, “No!”

Anton’s hand punching into Paine’s chest, pausing for a second, tugging and then removing a still beating heart. I heard Disco’s outraged cry of loss and misery as I ran toward my friend. Other vampires rushed to restrain Disco as he almost fought his way free, struggling beneath their combined strength, but I continued running to Paine, legs moving as fast as they could.

Anton brought Paine’s heart to his mouth and sank his fangs into it, drinking the liquid that continued to flow inside. Dark red oozed over his fingers, seeping through the crevices.

Paine’s blood.

From Paine’s heart.

It isn’t real, I told myself. It was a vampire mind trick. I’d touch him, bring the world back to the way it should be and everything would be over. Paine wasn’t smiling at me anymore, his dark eyes slowly closing, his lips moving as he whispered something I couldn’t understand. His voice was too soft, his words slurred.

I made it to him just as Anton released Paine’s throat. I caught his body as he slumped to the floor and cradled him to my chest, uncaring that tears streamed down my face and I continued to wail, aware on some level that Goose was screaming as well. I wanted to rage at the man in my arms, demanding Paine’s lifeless form explain what the hell he was thinking. Why did he have to be so stubborn? Why did he have to be so goddamned selfless?

Those thoughts were short-lived when Paine’s spirit appeared a few feet from me, whole and unharmed. He didn’t look at me or the chaos around him, his attention drawn to the far wall. I wished I could see the radiant beams that would take him to a better place, somewhere he never had to fear the touch of others. He took one step, then another. Then he stopped and spun around.

He frowned when he saw me, blinking as though to clear his eyes. I wondered if it was due to seeing his body in my arms, the former part of him that was now gone. Having been in his shoes in before, I knew how bizarre it was, how strange. The angels would continue to sing, but seeing yourself on the ground, covered in blood, was never pleasant.

“I’ve always hated to see you cry,” he said, focusing on me, blowing my theory out of the water.


“I can’t help it,” I said, devastated, shrouded in grief and shock. Even now, he thought of me. Not himself. Something cracked inside, crying from within, weeping into my chest.

He seemed to shake himself, to break free of something I couldn’t see. Then his stance changed, shoulders set back in sheer determination. My stomach sank, abdominal muscles going taut. I knew the look, recognized it, even though I didn’t want to.

Denial.

Please, not this. Never this.

“I’m not leaving.” He lifted his head, no longer entranced by what awaited him, glowering at it instead. “I’m not ready.”

I closed my eyes, drawing on strength I didn’t have, knowing I’d heard him correctly but needing to be sure. “What did you say?”

“I’m. Not. Leaving.”

I don’t know how he did it, how he turned his back on the light of Heaven, but Paine did. He approached me—me and the empty casing that was once his body. His dark eyes were intent, his jaw set in a hard line. This was the Paine I knew and loved, protecting what he cared for no matter the cost.

That was the problem.

More pain slammed into me as I fought with what I wanted and what he needed, emotions raw and unfiltered. He’d give up his chance at peace if he stayed, stuck in limbo. It wasn’t fair to him, not after all he’d suffered, to make him suffer more. In my heart, I knew it.