The Presence of Grace (Love and Loss #2)(39)
But then he’d look at me over his wine glass, eyes blazing, lips smiling, and something inside me would shift and crumble, just melt away with the heat of his gaze, and the idea of not being with him was suddenly the greater of two evils.
Dinner was over but Ruby needed fifteen minutes to bake a new batch of lava cakes, so Devon led me out to his patio. He shut the sliding door behind us, effectively blocking out the noise of Ruby and Jax bickering in the kitchen. I walked to the edge of the deck, resting my wine glass on the railing, and smiled when I felt Devon’s front hit my back. He pressed in close, resting his hands on the deck, caging me in. I loved it. Loved feeling enveloped by him, surrounded and protected.
“I’m glad you came to dinner tonight,” he whispered, his words a breath against my neck, sending shivers throughout my body.
“Me too. Dinner was delicious.”
“It’s funny because when I pictured myself dating again, I imagined it being so much harder than this. I thought there would be a problem with Ruby, mostly, having a hard time with another woman coming into the picture.”
“You didn’t think Jax would object?”
I both heard and felt Devon’s deep intake of breath, and the sigh that immediately followed.
“I wasn’t sure how he’d react, honestly—it could have gone either way. The truth of the matter is, Jaxy doesn’t really remember Olivia much. When she first passed he missed her, of course, but kids are resilient and he just kept trucking along. But the older he gets the fuzzier his early memories become. And that’s all he had—early memories. Ruby remembers more, which is why I thought she’d have a harder time. She remembers her mother and father together.” He paused for a moment and pressed a small kiss against the side of my neck. “I think the easiness has more to do with you than anything.”
“Me?”
“Yeah, you,” he said, laughing, his lips still pressed against my throat. “Jaxy obviously already knew he liked you, and Ruby fell right in line. It wouldn’t have been this easy with anyone else. It’s you.”
My heart leapt at his words. The last time anyone had said “It’s you” to me, they were blaming me for the relationship’s demise. I turned, his arms still caged around me, and looked up into his eyes.
“There are things I want to tell you, things I’ll need to tell you eventually, if we continue,” I started, unsure of where the sudden bravery came from. “But until I can, until I feel like it’s the right time or the right circumstance, I just need you to know that you make me happy.”
His face changed from confused and worried to a smile so bright and joyful, I couldn’t help but smile myself. And my God, he was handsome when he smiled. It never failed to make my breath catch. Before I could say anything ridiculous and embarrass myself, I stretched up and kissed him.
I kissed him softly, wanting to show him with the kiss that I was glad to be there, in his arms, at his house, with his kids. Happy to be with him. And I was. But what my kiss couldn’t say were all the heavy thoughts and memories weighing down my heart.
My hands tentatively reached for his waist, gripping the shirt there, gently twisting the fabric in my fingers, wanting him closer. His fingers feathered over my cheeks as his hands came to cradle my face. His lips were soft against mine, answering my gentle kiss with a tender one of his own. He moved forward just a little, forcing me to step backward, my back pressing into the railing but my front pressing deliciously hard against his.
With every press of his lips against mine, every touch of his tongue against mine, the heaviness in my heart seemed to become lighter, or less noticeable. When he kissed me, I wasn’t thinking about anything except his mouth on mine and his fingers threading through my hair. I was focused on how alive my body felt, how I was breathless for this man.
He eventually pulled away, like I knew he needed to, his forehead resting against mine as we both caught our breath.
“If my kids weren’t in there….” He only sounded mildly irritated, but he laughed regardless.
“Your kids are great,” I whispered, still trying to calm my body down from the effects of his kisses.
“Yeah.” He sighed. Then his mouth pressed a kiss to my cheek and the rest of my defenses simply crumbled around us. “Shall we go see if Ruby’s second batch of chocolate lava cakes turned out as good as the first?”
“You say chocolate and I’ll follow you anywhere,” I said with a smile, trying to hide the fact that I was falling desperately for the man right before his eyes.
He took my hand in his and led me inside, where the chocolate was just as good the second time around.
Chapter Fourteen
Grace
The door dinged as I pushed it open and I couldn’t help but smile at how “small town” the hardware store seemed to be.
Devon was at the register and his eyes shot to me when he heard the bell. He gave me a sexy smile, but then went right back to ringing up the man who looked to be purchasing a medium-sized power tool. I would never be the woman who could name tools on sight, but the man buying it looked capable enough.
I slowly wandered through the back aisles of the store, not wanting to disrupt his work. As I strolled through, letting my eyes graze over the many different kinds of painting tape and drop cloths he carried, I listened as Devon exchanged remodel horror stories with the customer, laughing along with him when the man admitted to purposefully dropping a can of paint on the couch his wife loved but he loathed.