The Night Parade(64)

He took a few deep breaths, washed his face and hands, then returned to their table.

“Are you okay, Dad?” Ellie asked upon his return. She was scrutinizing him.

“Sure thing.” He tried to sound upbeat.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

She spit a wad of food into her napkin then said, “Those people. The family back in Kentucky.”

“What about them?”

“Were they bad?”

“They were confused. They were sick.”

“With the Folly?”

“No, honey. They were sick with something else.”

“With what?” she asked.

Sick with madness, he thought. Which, in the end, really, is just the same thing as the Folly after all.

“They lost touch with reality. With humanity.”

“But what they wanted to do to us,” she said. “Was that wrong?”

He frowned at her. “Of course.”

“But they were just trying to help the boy,” she said. “The boy who was sick.”

“They were going to hurt us.”

“You shot that man.”

“Yes. To save our hides. To get us out of there.” He folded his hands atop the table. “What’s with all the questions?”

“I guess I just don’t see the difference,” she said.

“The difference in what?”

“In what they’re doing from what we’re doing,” she said.

David shook his head. “What are you talking about?”

“They were just trying to help their kid,” said Ellie. “Isn’t that what you’re doing for me?”

“It’s different.”

“How?”

“Because we’re not hurting anyone. We’re not killing people.”

“But we sort of are,” she said. Her voice was steady and her gaze stuck to him, unwavering. Almost accusatory. “We’re sort of killing the whole world.”

He reached across the table and touched her hand. “Hey,” he said. “Listen to me. It’s different.”

“Tell me how.”

“It just is.”

“But that’s not an answer. And it’s really not different. It’s selfish for us to watch everyone else die if I can save them.”

“There’s no guarantee you can save anyone.”

“But there’s a chance,” she said.

“Ellie, I don’t know if there is or not.”

“Of course there is,” she said. “They wouldn’t be looking for us if there wasn’t. You wouldn’t be so scared that they’ll find us and take me away if there wasn’t a chance.”

“The rest of the world isn’t our responsibility,” he said.

Her eyes narrowed almost imperceptibly. “Then how does that make us the good guys?”

He reached out, touched the top of her hand. “Can I tell you something I learned almost nine years ago? On the day you were born?”

“What’s that?”

“I learned that when you become a parent, you become a secondary character in the story of your own life.”

“I don’t know what that means.”

“It means that above all else, I’m your father. And that means my ultimate responsibility is for your well-being. That is most important above all else. You take a silent oath when you become a parent, and you pledge that, no matter what, you’ll never let anything bad ever happen to your kid. Ever. Do you understand?”

“But what about all the other people’s kids?”

“It’s unfortunate, but I won’t allow something bad to happen to you.”

“Maybe it doesn’t have to be bad.”

He slid his hand away from hers. “Where is this going?” he said. “You want to turn yourself in? Go back to Maryland?”

“I’m not scared of going back,” she said. “Not if I can help people.”

“Well,” he said, “that’s very honorable of you. But let me ask you something.”

“What?”

“Do you love me?”

She blinked at him. “Of course.”

“Do you realize that if anything ever happened to you, I’d just die?”

Her lips parted but she didn’t speak.

“I couldn’t go on if something happened to you, Ellie,” he said. “I would hurt so much that I wouldn’t be able to take it. Is that something that you’d want to happen to me?”

Slowly, she shook her head. Her eyes had become glassy, filling with tears.

“I would die, Ellie. If something bad happened to you, I would die. Do you understand?”

She nodded, knocking a tear loose and sending it down her cheek.

“So if you love me,” he said, “please, please stay with me on this. Please. Will you? Will you trust that I’m doing the best thing and stay with me on this?”

“I will,” she whispered. “I love you, Dad.”

“I love you, too, Ellie.” He handed her a napkin. “Now dry your face before someone notices.”