The Firework Exploded (The Holidays #3)(26)

I kiss her forehead and grab her hand, lacing my fingers through hers as I open the bathroom door and pull her out into the hallway.

“Just don’t let me forget about the SheWee in the sink. I don’t want mom thinking it’s a kitchen funnel and use it for the sugar for lemonade.”





Chapter 11




Country Crock

Noel


Thankfully, all the vodka I puked up earlier and the hours of pee I’d been holding that I finally got rid of helped a whole hell of a lot toward getting me sober. I’m still a little buzzed, but the room isn’t spinning, I can understand the things coming out of my mouth and they actually make sense.

My only problem at the moment is that I am now at the stage of all-night vodka consumption called “Drunk Crying.” Now that Sam and I are sitting on the couch in my parents’ living room, I’m facing him with my legs crisscrossed on the cushions and Sam’s arm is draped next to me over the back of the couch, I want to bawl like a baby. He smiles at me and I want to cry. His thumb brushes back and forth against the back of my shoulder and I want to cry. He smiles at me and the dimples in his cheeks make me want to cry.

Vodka is evil, and I’m never drinking it again.

“So, what should we talk about?” I ask with a forced smile, feeling like an idiot as soon as the words leave my mouth.

His arm moves from the back of the couch and he cups my cheek in his hands.

Yep, you guessed it, I want to cry. My eyes immediately fill with tears and Sam quickly leans forward and presses his lips to mine, pulling back to rest his forehead against mine.

“Please tell me this is the alcohol making you cry and not me,” Sam mutters.

“It’s definitely the alcohol. Vodka and I are breaking up and it’s been rough.”

He chuckles, pulling his head back to look into my eyes.

“Twice now, you’ve made a comment about me dying. What is that all about?” he asks, jumping right into things without giving me any more time to prepare myself or think about what I want to say so it doesn’t come out sounding completely stupid.

I close my eyes for a few seconds and take a deep breath for courage. Acting like an adult for once, I open my eyes back up to look at Sam instead of keeping them squeezed shut and pretending like if I can’t see him, none of this will be awkward.

“I found your prescription in the medicine cabinet a few weeks ago,” I admit. “I’m sorry, I should have told you but it freaked me out.”

He nods and lets out the breath he was holding, waiting for me to answer him.

“You have nothing to apologize for. That prescription wasn’t a secret or anything, and I should have told you about it a long time ago. I’m glad you were just freaked out by reading the side effects and you didn’t think my dick just stopped working for no reason.”

My eyes widen and he quickly keeps talking before I can say anything.

“It’s fine, it’s totally fine, Noel. You don’t have to feel bad for worrying about something like that. I’m sorry reading those side effects upset you, and I’m sorry for ever making you think I had this problem because I didn’t want you,” he explains. “I always want you. Every minute of every day. I get it though. I get why you freaked out and you’ve been acting weird. You want kids. I want to give you kids. It’s understandable that you had second thoughts about marrying a guy who you thought might not be able to give them to you.”

When he stops talking, it takes me a few seconds to comprehend what he just said.

“Wait a minute, you’ve been thinking this whole time that just because of one little issue, I wouldn’t want to marry you?” I ask him in shock.

“Well, when you don’t have all the details, it’s kind of a big issue. And you didn’t have all the details and I was too much of a * to give them to you because I was afraid it would give you the opportunity you’d been waiting for to call everything off,” he rambles nervously.

His hand drops from my cheek when I don’t immediately say anything and I lean forward, pressing both of my hands to either side of his face.

“We are such idiots,” I whisper. “Here I’ve been thinking this entire time that you’re going to call off the wedding because it’s all my family’s fault that you even need that prescription in the first place. My family is killing you, and you shouldn’t want to marry into this crazy mess. So yes, I went a little insane and thought that if I did whatever I could to keep you calm and keep your blood pressure down, it would fix everything. I didn’t even care about the problem with your penis.”

He raises one eyebrow at me and I roll my eyes.

“Okay, fine. I cared about it a little, but only because of what you already made clear. I was worried maybe you didn’t want me anymore, and then I found the pills and realized what the whole problem was and as much as it’s sucked not to have our usual amazing sex, it wasn’t what scared me the most. I don’t care about not having amazing sex, and I don’t care about not having kids. Not if I don’t have you.”

Sam groans, wrapping his arms around my waist and tugging me against him. I push up on my knees and climb onto his lap, straddling his thighs.

“I love you so much, Noel. But there’s one last thing you’ve been freaking out about for nothing,” he tells me, tightening his hold around me until our chests are pressed together. “My high blood pressure? I’ve had it since high school. I’ve also had a prescription since then.”