The Breakdown(14)

‘John?’ I laughed in surprise. ‘Yes, I do. Is he a friend of yours?’

‘I used to play tennis with him until a few months ago. Is he still tel ing jokes?’

‘Never stops.’ My phone, which I’d been holding in my hand, buzzed suddenly, telling me I had a text message.

‘Matthew,’ I told Jane, reading it. ‘The car park’s full so he’s double-parked in the road.’

‘You’d better go then,’ she said.

I drained the last of my wine. ‘Wel , it was lovely talking to you, and thank you for the wine.’

‘You’re welcome.’ She paused, then went on, her words coming out in a rush. ‘I don’t suppose you’d like to have a coffee, or lunch even, some time, would you?’

‘I’d love to!’ I said, genuinely touched. ‘Shall we swap numbers?’

So we took each other’s mobile number and I gave her my home one too, explaining about the terrible network reception, and she promised to give me a cal .

And less than a week later she did, suggesting lunch the following Saturday, as her husband would be there to look after the twins. I remember being surprised, but pleased, that she’d phoned so soon, and had wondered if she perhaps needed someone to talk too.





50


b a paris


We met in a restaurant in Browbury and, as we chatted easily together, it felt as if she was already an old friend. She told me how she had met Alex and I told her about Matthew, and how we were hoping to start a family soon. When I saw him standing outside the restaurant, because he’d arranged to meet me there, I couldn’t believe it was already three o’clock.

‘There’s Matthew,’ I said, nodding towards the window. ‘He must have got here early.’ I looked at my watch and laughed in surprise. ‘No, he’s bang on time. Have we real y been here two hours?’

‘We must have been.’ She sounded distracted and when I raised my head I saw that she was staring at Matthew through the window and I couldn’t help feeling a little burst of pride.

He’d been told on more than one occasion that he looked like a young Robert Redford and people, especial y women, often gave him a second look when they passed him in the street.

‘Shall I go and get him?’ I asked, standing up. ‘I’d like him to meet you.’

‘No, don’t worry, he looks busy.’ I glanced at Matthew; he had his phone out and was tapping away at it, engrossed in writing a text. ‘Some other time. I need to phone Alex anyway.’

So I left, and as I walked off hand in hand with Matthew, I turned and waved at Jane through the restaurant window.

*

The memory fades but my tears increase and somewhere

inside me I’m aware that I hadn’t shed as many tears

when Mum had died, because I’d been expecting it. But

The Breakdown





51


this news about Jane has shocked me to the core, shocked


me so much that it’s a while before everything comes

together in my brain and I’m hit by the terrible realisation that it was Jane I saw in the car on Friday night, Jane who had looked back at me through the window as I’d driven past, Jane who I’d left there to be murdered.

The horror I feel is matched only by the guilt that presses down on me, suffocating me. In an effort to calm myself I tell myself that if it hadn’t been raining so hard, if I’d been able to make out her features, if I’d known it was her, I would have got out of my car and run back to her through the rain without a second’s hesitation. But

what if she had recognised me and was waiting for me

to go and help her? The thought is horrendous but if she

had, surely she would have flashed her lights, or got out of her car and come to me? Then another thought hits me, more horrendous than the last. What if the killer had already been there, and she had let me drive away

because she wanted to protect me?

*

‘What’s the matter, Cass?’ Matthew asks when he arrives

back from the gym and finds me white-faced.

The tears that I can’t manage to still, spill from my

eyes. ‘You know that young woman who was murdered?

It was Jane.’

‘Jane?’





52


b a paris


‘Yes, the girl I met a couple of weeks ago for lunch

in Browbury, the one that I met at the party Rachel

took me to.’

‘What?’ Matthew looks shocked. ‘Are you sure?’

‘Yes, Rachel phoned to tell me it was someone who

worked for her company. I asked what her name was

and she said Jane Walters. Susie’s cancelling her party

because she knew her too.’

‘I’m so sorry, Cass,’ he says, putting his arms around

me and holding me tight. ‘I can’t imagine how you

must be feeling.’

‘I just can’t believe it’s her. It doesn’t seem possible.

Maybe there’s been a mistake, maybe it’s another Jane

Walters.’

I sense him hesitate. ‘They’ve released a picture of