Take the Fall(91)
“Marcus, I—”
“Why me?” he yells.
I close my eyes, unsure who I could possibly explain this to—the Marcus I thought used to hate me, the boy I kissed three nights ago, or the Marcus in front of me now. I guess I’ve lost him no matter what.
I was stupid to believe this would ever work.
My thoughts shift to my mom, Sheriff Wood, Dina, Uncle Noah—my family. My future. The one without Gretchen. Beside me, the creek ripples peacefully with no hint of the drop-off downstream.
“It was insurance, that’s all. Everyone was already saying it was you. I thought for a while I could just run from it, look the other way. I thought you hated me.” I bite my lip and look at him, my vision blurring with tears. “I didn’t expect what happened between us. The more we spent time together—I’ve never felt that way before.”
My lip trembles. I blink so I can see his eyes clearly.
“I can’t let you go down for Gretchen’s murder, because I’m the one who killed her.”
FORTY-TWO
I’VE IMAGINED THIS LOOK ON Marcus’s face a hundred times, but I hoped I’d never actually see it. His gaze is stony, his posture rigid. He looks like he wants to throw me over the falls, and I lower my head, waiting to see if he does, because I deserve it. When nothing happens, I open my mouth. One of us has to.
“It was an accident—I didn’t mean to.” My heart hammers in my chest, but I keep my eyes on the ground. “She’d been toying with me, pulling one string at a time. She kept hinting that I’d regret my decision to go to Penn, that she’d find a way to get my scholarship revoked, and I was terrified because I knew she would. I didn’t even realize how close she came until a week ago. She’d set up an entire website and posted my actual essays for sale. All I knew at the time was that I’d pissed her off. It never occurred to me there might be more to it than school. I mean, she showed me the video, but it didn’t make sense then. I didn’t get it till you told me . . . till I saw your painting the other day.” I chew my lip. “I know it’s not your fault, but I had been so careful to stay on her good side. I can only imagine what went through her head when she saw it.”
I steal a glance at Marcus, my stomach clenching when his expression hasn’t changed.
“If I lost that scholarship, there was no way I could turn down her parents’ money for college, and she knew it. I was looking for something—anything—I could use to make her leave me alone, and then you and Kirsten pissed her off just enough.” A strong breeze moves through the trees, pushing the empty swings back and forth like they’re haunted.
“The only reason Gretchen would have let Kirsten come to Brianne’s party was for the chance to humiliate her. She was clearly trying to get her drunk when we got there, watching her do stupid things, but I don’t think she ever expected to find her with you. I’d never seen her so furious. I was barely speaking to Gretchen that night, but I drove her home and dropped her off after they fought, just like I’ve always said.
“She was usually careful never to let me touch her phone, but she was so angry, she dropped it on the seat of the car when she went inside. I grabbed it—I’d known her passcode for months—but then I ran into Haley walking her dog just as I shut the door of the Mercedes. I was so nervous Gretchen would come looking for the phone while we were talking, but she never did. I called her house from it, after I went into the woods. I wanted to bargain, but you can guess how much she liked that.”
My voice shakes, I curl my hands into fists.
Marcus doesn’t say anything, but he’s still here, he’s listening.
I need him to understand.
“It wasn’t just that I had her SD card, her powerful little black book. Some of that stuff—people’s passwords, nude pictures—could’ve gotten her in serious trouble. We agreed to meet at the top of the falls. She must have thought it wouldn’t take long to deal with me if she left her purse with your money in the car on the way. We were both in the clearing just after eleven. I promised to send the memory card back to her after my first semester at Penn, but that just pissed her off more. I couldn’t tell if she was more enraged that I tried to defy her, or that I actually succeeded. No one ever managed to get the upper hand with Gretchen. She threatened to keep me from going to school altogether. When I didn’t give in, she said she’d call the health department on the diner, have it shut down to make my family pay for what I was trying to do. At first I was shocked that she’d go that far, but I guess I shouldn’t have been. It wasn’t even about Penn or Stanford anymore; she just wanted to regain control. I decided to leave. I thought maybe she’d settle down overnight and we could talk. I got to the bridge, but that’s when—” I stop, running my fingers over my arms.
Cold hands close around my throat and drag me backward. My heart races, my ears fill with the sound of rushing water, my own ragged gasps. I wait for her to stop—let go, but she doesn’t. I scratch and pry at her fingers until finally I scream.
She drops me facedown in the dirt and for a second I think she’s gone. I roll to my side to get up, but then her foot comes crushing into my rib cage and my breath leaves my body in a gush of fire. She’s on top of me then, shoving my face into the earth, fingers twisted through my hair. I push and scratch at her, and for just a moment, shove her off. I scramble backward, my hand flying to my pocket.