Tabula Rasa(12)

Whatever Trevor had planned or wanted to say, he stifled behind a grunt. Then he said, “We need to wait until it’s warmer. Not a good idea to leave now.”

I couldn’t argue with the sensibility of that. It wasn’t as if it dropped down into freezing arctic temperatures around here, but depending on traveling conditions, it might be difficult to cope with the cold at night.

Trevor’s expression shifted, and his gaze moved languidly over me. I was wrapped loosely in the blankets, wearing only his T-shirt. He pounced on me like a hungry jungle cat, his hands frantically roaming over me while his mouth sought the warm invitation of mine.

He nearly ripped the T-shirt in two as he jerked it over my head and arms, flinging the offending article of clothing far away.

He cupped my face, forcing my eyes to meet his, and asked, “Do you love me, Elodie?”

I still couldn’t remember him or anything else from before my fall, but if I were being honest, these long months alone with him... while it hadn’t brought back any of the old feelings I couldn’t remember, it had brought something new.

“I-I think I do.”

There was a loud clatter and a reverberating metal echo as something hit the ground outside the door. My eyes widened, mirroring his. Our movements stilled. For a moment our breath froze, then in concert it began to move so slowly and quietly in and out of our lungs it was almost painful. I didn’t have to ask. Trevor had forgotten to bring up the drawbridge.

I couldn’t believe I’d ever resented him doing that at night. It was for my protection—and his—while we slept.

Had some forest creature wandered in, looking for scraps of food and warmth? Or was it a survivor?

Something deep inside me hoped against everything that it was another survivor. Perhaps a group of them. I didn’t pause to consider whether such people might be good or bad, only that they were other humans who still existed in the world after months without knowing for sure.

A tall figure dressed in all black filled the doorway. I pulled the sheet up, gripping it tight against my chest. Trevor stood smoothly and moved in front of me. He hadn’t managed to fully undress yet. His pants were still on.

He pulled the small handgun out of his pocket. The other man reacted immediately, drawing his own gun so fast it nearly gave me whiplash to watch it unfold. It was a smooth, practiced move. This guy had training. And I wasn’t convinced Trevor did.

“Please, just leave us alone,” I pleaded.

The stranger didn’t even look at me. His eyes were trained on Trevor’s as if he could see inside his head to know his next move. Maybe his next several moves.

Trevor wasn’t backing down. He racked the slide, but before he could get a shot off, the other man fired several into his stomach.

“No!” I dragged the sheet and scrambled to Trevor’s side as he dropped, clutching at him as if to keep his guts from spilling out. I pressed the linen against his wounds, but there was too much blood coming out of him far too quickly. He stared up at me a moment in disbelief, and then his eyes went blank and dead while my tears dripped onto his face.

“Trevor! No! Stay with me, don’t go.” My hand trembled as I felt for a pulse. There was nothing. Still, I pressed the sheet against his stomach, as if he might come back to life somehow if I could only stop the bleeding.

“He’s gone,” the man said.

I tried not to think about the fact that I was alone in this castle with the terrifying stranger who’d just shot and killed my husband. My tears fell harder as I wrapped myself in the firm denial that any of this was happening. Maybe he still had a pulse... I just hadn’t found the vein. Maybe... maybe...

In a fairy tale, this would be the part where magic and light would swirl around him and he’d get up, revived by the true love and magic that somehow inexplicably existed in my tears. And we’d live happily ever after as the castle sprang to life again. All the kudzu would recede, the graffiti would vanish, and life as I was sure I’d once known it would come rushing back in beautiful full bloom.

But this was a fake fairy tale castle, and my tears weren’t magic.

I grabbed Trevor’s gun with shaking hands and pointed it up at the stranger from my position on the ground. It felt so foreign to me that even without my memories I was sure this was the first time I’d ever held a gun.

“Do you want to die with your lover?” the stranger asked.

Maybe I did. I couldn’t see a reason to go on now after another thing had been taken from me. The world. My memory. My husband and only protector. I’d thought perhaps the stranger might be reluctant to shoot me, but staring into ice blue eyes, I knew he’d pull the trigger without hesitation. And I knew if Trevor hadn’t been able to shoot first, my odds were even slimmer.

“Put the gun on the ground and slide it over to me,” he said.

“Please don’t hurt me.” My hands shook so hard, even thinking about aiming properly was pointless.

“Put the gun on the ground and slide it over to me,” he repeated. His voice remained steady and calm.

I was sure he would shoot me if I didn’t, and I was equally sure I didn’t have the resolve to shoot him. And if I shot him, I had no hope of survival. That was it. I was done. I didn’t know if I had any hope anyway, but I knew I couldn’t survive in the world as it now was without someone to help me—ideally a strong male someone. This man and whoever might be traveling with him were my only chance.