Sunday Morning (Damaged #7.5)(7)

“Sure,” I mumbled in a shaky voice. “How did you find me?”

“I’ve been following you all day.”

Smiling, I rolled my eyes. “Sure.”

“Good timing, I guess. Or maybe I just sense when crazy little girls are about to go feral on a poor schmuck.”

“The * touched me.”

Kirk never lost his smile, but his jaw clenched.

“Are you jealous?” I asked, feeling confident despite my still shaking hands.

“Sure. I’ve been dreaming about you hitting me with a backpack for weeks.”

Laughing, I backed away. “I better go before it gets dark.”

“Won’t be dark for hours. Where are you going?”

For whatever reason, I didn’t want to tell him about the community center. I felt stupid for wandering around as I had been.

“I was bored, so I took a walk.”

“We’re four miles from your place. That’s a long f*cking walk.”

“My boyfriend lives around here so…”

Not buying my attempt to play him, Kirk shook his head. “Your boyfriend is a punk. I heard he’s cheating on you too, babe. Gotta get you some higher standards.”

Smiling, I admired the sight of him looking so powerful on his Harley. His dark blond hair shined in the late afternoon sun, and his dark eyes hid behind mirrored glasses.

I stepped closer. “Where are you going?”

“I was bored, so I figured I drive around.”

“Are you making fun of me?”

“Yeah, what you gonna do about that?”

Uncertain how to respond, I shrugged and stepped back. “Thanks for the help with the *.”

“Let me give you a ride back.”

I shuddered at the thought of returning to the trailer park. “No. I’m not ready to go home.”

Kirk glanced at the road where afternoon traffic zipped past. The world was oblivious to this moment, but I sensed something powerful happening. Kirk struggled with whether to let me walk away or push this connection between us. I didn’t think the decision should be a big deal for him. What would Kirk have to lose if I said no? How many of those trashy yet beautiful women at the strip club said yes every damn night? Kirk didn’t need me. I was replaceable in a way he could never be for me.

Kirk hid behind his mirrored glasses, yet I felt him arguing with himself. His tension ebbed and flowed between us.

“Let’s go for a ride,” he casually said, gesturing with his head for me to get on behind him.

Though I didn’t understand why he struggled with the decision, I knew why I hesitated. Kirk Johansson was a man in every sense of the word. I’d played adult for a long, damn time, but this was the first time I really had to walk the walk. Kirk might break my heart, destroy everything about me, and then walk away like none of it mattered. Was I strong enough to face that possibility?

Like Kirk, I struggled with whether one ride might lead to an ending I couldn’t handle. Like him, I gave into the curiosity I felt for our uneasy dance. Climbing behind him, I settled onto the Harley like a pro. Wrapping my arms around Kirk proved more difficult. I’d never touched a man I wanted before. Kirk was a dream come to life, and I feared waking up.





5 - Kirk


Jodi never felt like a kid holding onto me while we rode around Chesterfield. I told myself she wasn’t old enough to know what she did to me. When I was her age, everything was a f*cking game. I wanted what I wanted at that f*cking moment, and I didn’t give a shit about anyone or anything beyond my needs.

I finally pulled my Harley into a spot next to a park just outside of Chesterfield. The place was quiet except for a few people walking their dogs. Jodi slid off the bike and steadied herself. Her cheeks were bright pink from the heat, and I noticed the way her shirt glued itself to her sweaty skin.

After I climbed off my hog, Jodi studied it. Her gaze admired the curves of the bike while I admired hers.

“A guy at school talks about how his car purrs. I don’t get why he thinks that’s cool. Your bike roars angry and powerful. All the metal and leather demands to be acknowledged. I used to hate the sound of the Harleys in the trailer park. Now I smile,” she said and then added, “Because the Harleys make me think of you.”

“What is it that you think I am?”

Jodi heard the challenge in my voice. Her gaze narrowed, and I prepared for her temper.

“I’m not blind. I know you’re the bad guy. I know what bad guys do. Knowing and feeling are different. I’d think you know that with you being so old and wise.”

Exhaling hard, I light a cigarette. “Girls like you romanticize men like me.”

“Let’s be square here, Kirk. I’m not the girl from the right side of the tracks looking to slum it with a bad boy. I don’t have a big future waiting for me that I’m ditching for the dream of getting into your jeans. Stop playing the victim.”

I struggled not to smile at her comment. Keeping my stern expression, I needed to make her understand.

“I’m trying to be a nice guy and keep you from making a mistake.”

“What mistake? Smiling when I think about you? Or maybe you want to stay out of my fantasies while I touch myself at night. You play the nice guy, but I’m not a fairytale damsel, and you’re certainly no knight.”