Standing in the Shadows (McClouds & Friends #2)(133)

"The clinic? Tonia worked at the clinic?" The net started to widen in Connor's mind, scooping up shifting, darting thoughts. Sifting and sorting, searching for patterns.

Sean's eyes narrowed as he recognized the look on his brother's face. "Hold everything. What's going on? What's with that look, bro?"

"Erin met her about a year ago," Connor said slowly. "What a coincidence, huh?"

"Uh… wait a sec. Are we still freaked out about Novak? Didn't you tell me Luksch is in Europe, and Novak got blown sky-high yesterday? Have we turned that page, or what?"

"Don't start with me, Sean."

"I'm not!" Sean protested. "Just help me out here! I need to know where we stand before I can figure out what to do."

"I know that, goddamn it!" Connor exploded. "That's been my problem from the start! I don't know where I stand! I don't know what's real anymore! I can't trust my eyes, my ears, my instincts, nothing!"

"OK. I had my tantrum, and you're entitled to yours," Sean soothed. "I'm going to talk to Davy and Seth. You just sit tight. Try not to think. You always f*ck up when you think too much. If you see any apparitions from beyond the grave, call me. And stay out of trouble."

Connor tried to laugh. "That's my line. To you."

Sean got into his Jeep and rolled down the window. "Yeah. It's weird to be the one to say it to you for a change. Later, bro."

He watched the Jeep leap down the rutted driveway. The bit of data that Sean had dropped so casually echoed through his head.

Hell of a coincidence, that a nurse who worked at the clinic while he was in his coma should strike up a bosom friendship with Erin. There was no connection that made sense. No one had any reason to know a year ago how interested he was in Erin Riggs. Her mother had guessed it, his brothers had known it. No one else.

His skin prickled. He felt it happening. Marching orders taking form inside his mind from an authority he couldn't gainsay. He was going back to the clinic, to find out more about this Tonia. Now.

He was Crazy Eamon's boy, flesh and blood and bone. If this meant he was nuts, so be it. It would drive him even more crazy to resist that inner force. He couldn't go against his own nature.

He ran into the house. He was trembling with wild energy. He strapped on his ankle holster with the .22, stuck the SIG-Sauer into his pants. He threw on his coat and bolted for the car.

He was going to catch hell for not washing the lunch dishes. It was a cardinal rule to leave the kitchen clean, but this was a special case. The Cadillac wallowed and fishtailed in the gravel. It finally leaped into action, bouncing heavily over the ruts.

He was diving headfirst straight back into his paranoid fantasy, and anybody who didn't like it could go f*ck himself.



* * *





Chapter Twenty-Four





"I cannot believe it," Tonia scolded. "I simply cannot believe you are dressed like that to go to Mueller's house. You're as white as a ghost, and even if you weren't, that washed-out gray is all wrong for you. And your hair. Save me. The scraped-back peeled-onion look is too severe for your face. What is wrong with you?"

Erin stared down at her lap, too tired to react. "Don't bug me, Tonia. I had a really bad night. I don't want to look pretty. I was shooting for respectable when I got dressed. That's all I ask of myself."

"You should have called me! I would have come over and done an emergency salvage job," Tonia fussed. "Nothing raises the spirits better than a quickie makeover, chica. Some magic eye gel, some cover-up, some foundation, a little blush—"

"I'm not interested in Mueller. I don't want him to be interested in me. There is no reason for me to make a fuss over my looks today."

Tonia shot her a cold glance. "Well! Excuse me."

"Sorry," Erin said miserably. "I didn't mean to snap."

"What's happening with your boyfriend?" Tonia demanded. "Is he the reason you're so pissy?"

Erin's jaw began to shake. "I think it's over."

"Who dumped who?"

Tonia's harsh choice of words made Erin flinch. "I think… I think that I dumped him."

"You think?" Tonia rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. You're not sure?"

Erin pressed her mouth against her hand. "I can't talk about it."

"Oh. That bad, huh? Frankly, I'm relieved. The guy was way, way too intense for my tastes. I mean, the first time I met him he was holding a gun on me, for God's sake."

"Maybe so." She dashed away stray tears and thanked heaven she'd done without mascara. "But let's have this conversation some other time. Like, six months to a year from now might be better."

Tonia sniffed. "God, you're sensitive. So what's wrong with Mueller? Is he repulsive or something?"

Erin held her eyes wide open, hoping they would dry out. "Not at all," she said dully. "He's pleasant. Nice looking, intelligent, cultured. There's nothing wrong with him. Nothing that I can put my finger on."

"He's just not Connor McCloud. That's his only flaw, right?"

Erin closed her eyes. "Tonia. Please. Could you just this once give me a break? I'm begging you. On my knees."