Savage Love (Back Down Devil MC #7)(29)

Sometimes, it wasn’t lonely.

He opened the door and froze when he saw Ella.

She was fast asleep. She had put her shirt and bra back on. And now she wasn’t alone in the bed. Beck next to her, sleeping on his side. Ella had an arm on the other side of the baby, her mother instinct working hard to make sure the little guy didn’t get hurt during the course of the night.

Miller approached the bed and felt a wicked pain shoot through his heart. He made fists and thought for a second he was having a damn heart attack. But it wasn’t a heart attack, not even close.

He felt like he could cry.

This should be my life.

If that goddamn night hadn’t gotten all f*cked up. If the truth hadn’t reared its ugly face and thrown Miller into a wall and left him with no real good choice except to take his heart out of it and help to push Ella in the right direction.

Little did she know, she was sleeping just feet away from a diamond ring that was supposed to be put on her f*cking finger that night. Instead, she ended up tongue f*cking Jerry and the rest had become history.

Only now the history was right there in his bed. Her body lingering with the scent of their sex. But all that didn’t matter because of the baby on her side, wearing a dark blue one piece pajama set. There were little monkeys and bananas all over the pajamas.

“Cute,” Miller whispered.

He walked to the alcove and grabbed the sleeping bag. He quietly rolled it up and put it on the other side of the bed. Adding a few pillows, Miller made it so if Beck did try and roll anywhere, he wouldn’t fall off the bed and hurt himself.

Then Miller reached down and touched the baby’s warm head.

What a horrible feeling racing through his body.

I’m going to kill your father. Because if I don’t, he’s going to kill you. He’s going to kill your mama. He’s a bad guy. But you’re not going to be a bad guy, kid. No way in hell. I’ll make damn sure of that.

Miller felt his throat tighten. He shut his eyes, blocking f*cking tears.

Fucking tears.

Miller hadn’t even cried when Griffin was killed.

He sucked in a breath and took his hand from the baby. He walked to the other side of the bed and pulled on the covers, making sure Ella was tucked in. Leaning down, Miller stuck his nose to her hair and smelled.

Fucking Ella. My f*cking Ella.

He pulled away, resisting the urge to kiss her cheek.

He went to the closet and quietly found the cot and grabbed himself a blanket and pillow. Leaving the small light on on the nightstand, Miller left the room and set up shop right at the door, as promised. He put his gun under the pillow and stared up at the ceiling. Through the hallway he could hear the echoing sound of the clubhouse still partying. A piece of him wanted to go out there and just get annihilated drunk. Then he could wake up next to some reliever and swim in that pool of guilt.

Better yet, Miller would find a way to safely move Ella and Beck. Get them out of the state to hide somewhere until the storm blew over. Maybe she had some family.

Yeah, right.

Miller knew about her family. She was goddamn alone.

“Not anymore, darling,” Miller whispered.

He shut his eyes and pictured Ella sitting on his motorcycle, topless, biting her lip. Ready for him. Begging for him.

He warned her then about tempting his biker heart… and he’d do it again if he had to. But it was already too late, wasn’t it?





twelve.



Ella opened her eyes and saw Beck smiling at her. He had a handful of her hair and pulled it to his mouth, chomping on his own fingers as he bit her hair. Smiling big, Ella inched forward and kissed Beck until he let out a shrieking giggle. She pulled her hair away from his small, exploring grip and then dangled it in front of him.

“What are you doing?” she asked. “Huh? Tell me. Tell Mommy.”

Beck’s eyes went wide. He let out a oohh sound.

“You like my hair? Do you want long hair?”

Beck gurgled and waved his hands.

“Maybe your own little leather cut,” Ella said and laughed at herself.

She rolled to her back and let out a breath. She couldn’t remember the last time waking up in such a good mood. There was no good reason to be in a good mood either. She was in danger. Beck could be in danger. But what happened with Miller?

Whew.

Ella ran a hand across her forehead. She was getting heated just thinking about it. His commanding strength and touch. Carrying her to the bed. Turning her around.

She had needed that so f*cking bad.

Ella pushed herself up and sat there. She noticed the collection of sleeping bag and pillows next to Beck.

Had Miller done that?

Ella grinned.

She got out of the bed and checked for evidence of Miller.

There was none.

Where did he sleep then?

Wherever the hell he wanted. He was the President. He could be with anyone. Anytime.

Beck let out a whine.

Ella set her attention to the baby and lifted him up. She bounced him and kissed his slobbery mouth, making loud noises. He grabbed at her cheeks, his little nails scratching at her, making a gurgling noise as he laughed.

“Come on,” she whispered. “Let’s go for a walk.”

Ella opened the door and almost tripped.

There was a cot there. Nobody was inside it though. A blanket was thrown off it, as though someone had been there.