Saddle Up(61)

“Why do you say that?” Miranda asked, suddenly defensive.

“You hear nothing from him for weeks, and then he shows up out of the blue. Next, he disappears again. A woman needs a man who’s going to be there for her through thick and thin.”

“That’s not his fault, Jo-Jo. It’s his job that’s taken him away.”

“A job he doesn’t believe in?” Jo-Jo said. “Makes me wonder about his character.”

“He doesn’t have a defective character, Jo-Jo. He’s just trying to figure out what he wants from life. A lot of people feel lost at different times in their lives. Just like me, he’s been struggling, but unlike me, he’s estranged from those he cares most about.”

Jo-Jo’s gaze narrowed. “Why is he estranged?”

“His grandparents think he exploited his heritage. He wants to reconcile with them, but it’s a really complicated situation. They’re still angry about some things they didn’t approve of and won’t let him come back home.”

“It’s called tough love, Miranda. Sometimes we have to make things unpleasant for those we love in order for them to see the light.”

“I know, but I really hurt for him. I think part of his refusal to work here is that deep down he wants to be a part of something and not just hired help. That’s what he really needs, Jo-Jo. To belong.”

“Don’t we all?” Jo-Jo said.

Their conversation paused as the waitress appeared with two huge slices of chocolate cream pie. Miranda rolled her eyes in bliss with the first bite. “It’s not quite as good as yours, but pretty darned close.”

“Not even close,” Jo-Jo said. “I’ll prove it to you this Thanksgiving. I’m glad you’ll be here this year. I spent all three holidays last year with Robert and Judy in Phoenix, but I’d much rather have been at home. I enjoyed seeing them, but six weeks was far too long, especially since we spent so much of it looking at condos in retirement communities.”

“Is that what you want?” Miranda asked in surprise. “To move to Phoenix with them?”

“It’s what they want, but not exactly with them. All the places they took me to were at least twenty minutes away from their house.”

“I’m speechless, Jo-Jo.”

“You don’t have to say a word, sweetheart. It’s true that actions speak louder, and that trip told me everything I needed to know. They don’t want me in their lives, they just want control. Judith invited me down again this year, but I’m not going. If they want to celebrate Thanksgiving as a family, they’ll have to come up here. If they don’t come, that’s just fine with me. The two of us will spend it together.”

“I haven’t had a real Thanksgiving in ages,” Miranda said. “I spent it alone for three out of the four years I was in California. Last year was the only exception. I was invited to dinner with some of Lexi’s friends, but it didn’t feel much like Thanksgiving.”

“Why’s that?”

“They were Buddhist vegetarians, so there wasn’t even a turkey. We ordered takeout Thai food instead.”

Jo-Jo’s eyes widened. “Thai food for Thanksgiving?”

Miranda laughed. “Yup. Pretty much anything goes in L.A. They aren’t so big on tradition there, but I’m a traditional girl. That’s another reason I didn’t fit. I’m glad to be here with you this year.”

“So you still don’t have any regrets about leaving?”

“No, Jo-Jo. I don’t. I thought I might when I told Bibi I wasn’t coming back, but I have perfect peace about it. Helping those horses makes me feel like I’m finally doing something right with my life. I feel like it’s what I was meant to do.”

“You once felt that way about your filmmaking,” Jo-Jo reminded her.

“Filmmaking was all about me and my desires. This is so much bigger than just me. I haven’t given up on films completely, but right now I feel like I can make a difference, and I want to make a difference, Jo-Jo.”

“I think you know by now that I’ll always support whatever you do, as long as your heart is invested,” Jo-Jo said.

“It is.” Miranda added wistfully, “I just wish Keith’s was as well.”

“I guess we’ll have to take Wade up on his offer to help us find someone,” Jo-Jo said.

“Yeah. I guess so,” Miranda reluctantly agreed. It was so frustrating to think how Keith chose to waste his talents.

“When we’re finished here, we should also go and take a look at some used equipment. With winter coming on, we’re going to have to feed a lot of hay to those mustangs. I think we might need a bale splitter. I wish I hadn’t already sold ours, but I didn’t think I’d ever need one again. I’m hoping we might be able to rent one.”

“Shouldn’t we wait until we hire someone to help us?” Miranda asked.

“I suppose we could,” Jo-Jo agreed. “I’ve just become used to doing everything myself. To be honest, now that you’re doing my morning chores, I’m not even sure how to occupy my time.”

“That’s probably a good thing. You’ve worked hard for a lot of years. You should do something for yourself now, Jo-Jo. Something you enjoy.”