Rules of Survival(50)

His nose scrunched, and he cocked his head to the right, before settling back down on the ground in front of me. “You can be so incredibly thick. It’s true, I don’t think I’m cut out for this kind of thing. I’ve got too short a fuse. Pat keeps his cool under any circumstance. You need that in this line of work—especially when dealing with people like Deeds. But what I’m talking about is you.”

My traitorous heartbeat sped up. Excitement—regardless of how hard I tried to tamp it down—started to bubble. “Me?”

“These shackles are the best thing that’s happened to me because of you. Being shackled to you. That’s what I’m talking about.”

“You’re insane. You’re basically stuck to a ticking time bomb.”

“Am I? If I hadn’t ended up cuffed to you, I would have never gotten the opportunity to start getting to know you. You’re more than a distraction; I like you. I think you’re smart and funny. I think you’ve got some mad skills, even if you don’t see it yourself, and you’re a good person. You’ve been through some crazy stuff and you haven’t made it all about you. I’ve met a lot of people like you—and like me. People who’ve been dealt a shitty hand. They get hard. Cold. Only care about themselves and where their next thing is coming from. That’s not you. You’re not a manipulator.”

“You don’t know me.”

“Maybe not inside out, but I know you better than you think I do.”

“Why? Because we’ve spent a few days attached at the hip?”

He flashed me a half smile and an involuntary shiver raced down my spine. That smile had undoubtedly been the undoing of many a girl. “Exactly. I’ve seen you at your worst. Angry and bitter and mean. And I’ve seen you be brave and stand up against things that would tear most people down. I don’t think you’re worried about me not knowing you. I think what you’re really worried about is you not knowing you. You’ve spent so much time living like your mom, that you don’t have any idea who the hell you are.”

I tried to answer. I wanted to tell him he was wrong, and crazy, and out of line, but my brain refused to let me lie. Not this time. Not about this—because he was right. With Mom gone, I had no idea who Mikayla Morgan really was.

“I’m not proposing or anything, but yeah, I do like you. And no. There’s nothing wrong with that. You’re different from any other girl I’ve met. Weird—but in a good way. I look at you and find that I’ve got no idea what you’re going to say or do next.” He leaned even closer until our noses were touching, and all the hairs on the back of my neck jumped to attention. “But I wanna find out.”

Forget the shiver. I had chills. Arctic shards of ice doing marathon sprints up and down my spine. What was a girl supposed to say to a pitch like that? I opened my mouth, but then closed it. My brain was at war with, well, everything else. Heart, hormones—the whole package. For the first time in my life, I ignored what Mom would have said and went with what I wanted.

I grabbed the sides of his face and pulled him to me. The kiss started sweet. Very PG. But it changed, and I wasn’t sure if it was me or Shaun who kicked it into overdrive. One minute our lips were moving together, my uncuffed hand on his face, and his arms around my waist. The next, he was drawing away and pulling me to my feet.

I didn’t question him as he led me across the edge of the lot, past the tree line, and into the forest. As soon as we were away from the tents and people, and tucked into the shadows, he backed me against the nearest tree.

“So, I guess you’re okay with me kissing you?” he asked, leaning in and nuzzling my neck. I let my head fall back, a small moan escaping my lips, and he laughed. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

It was a yes. It was a hell yes.

He worked his way down my neck, lingering at my shoulder. A rush of cold air assaulted me as he tugged the collar aside, covering the small patch of exposed skin with fiery kisses. I brought my free hand to the back of his head, running my fingers through his hair. He groaned and leaned into my touch for a moment before lifting me up and stepping away from the tree.

Lowering us to the ground, he never broke eye contact. That kind of scrutiny would have normally sent me scurrying for the nearest rock to crawl under, but with Shaun it was different. I found that I wanted him to look at me. I wanted him to see me.

He lay back, letting me straddle his waist. “It’s all you, Kayla. You have complete control over me,” he said softly. “I’ve got a feeling you had it from the moment I first saw you in the cabin.”

I bent down and kissed him. The smell of the forest, mixed with the scent of him, was intoxicating. Like a jolt to the body. Alive. That same feeling I’d gotten at the trailer, but ten times stronger, because this time, I wasn’t standing in my own way. I knew what I wanted and had every intention of taking it. Deepening the kiss, I savored the sensation. It was electric, and I felt more alive in that moment than ever before.

He kept his cuffed hand close, but let his free one drift to my hips, urging them forward. The movement created a friction so intense, I gasped.

So did he. “Fuck,” he groaned into my mouth. He captured my bottom lip between his teeth and pulled, letting his tongue skim across as his fingers gripped the thin material of my sweatpants and tugged hard. “Please, God, do that again.”