Ruined (The Eternal Balance #1)(13)
“Jax…” The sound of my name on her lips had a powerful effect on not only me, but the demon. As she nuzzled my ear and ran a finger up the other side of my neck, the demon rumbled and the scene around me changed. Another flash, this one unlike anything the thing had shown me before.
Sam was beneath me, breathing hard and biting down on her lower lip. She arched her back and moaned, exposing herself to me, and my real-time pulse spiked. The vision wasn’t real, but was wreaking havoc on my body all the same. It was impossible not to see her like that, willing and vulnerable, and not have a physical reaction.
There was a surge of amusement from the demon. It enjoyed the way this made me feel. Hungry and furious. Starving to touch her, while at the same time, so terrified of hurting her more than I already had. The flash continued, and I watched, unable to block it out, as I lowered my lips to the hollow of her throat. I worked my way down, dipping between her breasts and nipping at the skin along the way, drawing shocked little noises from Sam’s lips.
The flash ended, leaving me hard and hot, and for a second, I forgot to breathe.
“You really want a kiss? How about a wet one?” The heat from her breath lingered for a moment, followed by a stream of tepid, foul-smelling water as it rained over my head and ran down my shoulders.
I stumbled away and flicked the excess water from my arms. In a way, I was thankful. While not as good as a cold shower, it helped get the situation back under control. Unfortunately, it also made the demon furious. It pushed, but I gritted my teeth and stuffed it down. With an irritated sigh, I met her gaze and held it. “Are we even now?”
“Not a chance.” She let the empty bucket fall to the sidewalk and rubbed her hands down the sides of her jeans. “But who cares, right? You’re leaving again anyway.” Sam turned on her heel and strode to the door. A quick glance over her shoulder, and she was gone.
It was plain to see by the swirling colors above her head that she wanted me to stay despite how I’d left her behind. That alone should have lit a California wildfire under my ass. But something was wrong. Sam was in trouble—whether she knew it or not.
An hour ago, I’d been ready to leave. I’d come to the club to say good-bye once and for all, determined to put Harlow, and her, in the past for good. Now I had no choice. I had to stay—at least until I made sure she wouldn’t have any more “car trouble.”
I’d gone back to Rick’s for a dry shirt. At least, that’s what I told myself. What was supposed to be a ten-minute stopover ended up being three beers for me and two hours’ worth of bullshitting. I probably would have stayed longer, but Rick was exhausted, and I knew I was pushing my luck. I gathered my coat and was almost out the door when Chase came in.
“My jaw is fine. Thanks for asking.”
I stopped halfway across the living room. Turning around was a bad call, but I did it anyway. “You shouldn’t be here.”
“I told him that,” Rick called from the other room. A series of coughs followed.
Chase leaned against the doorframe and grinned. Not a care in the world. That always bugged me. Easy and smooth. The guy never stressed over anything. “Why? Because you’ll kick my ass?”
Fists tight, I took a step closer. It was a dangerous move considering the way the demon inside raged, but I couldn’t help it. “It’s a miracle you’re not in traction after what I walked into yesterday.”
My brother was the only human whose emotions I couldn’t see. We’d written it off as the curse—technically he was part of it, the Abel to my Cain—but it still bugged me. There had never been a problem seeing Rick’s colors. He frowned. “I got a little carried away trying to prove a point.”
“What f*cking point? All the other girls in the world and you pick Sammy?”
Chase sighed and grabbed a baseball from the table. He’d won the game with it in tenth grade, and Rick had it mounted. “The point is, that even when I push your buttons, you can hold it together. If anything was going to set your dial to meltdown, that would have been the thing to do it. It was one little punch, man. I’m fine. Besides, I was a little jealous.”
Had everyone in this town lost their goddamned minds? “Jealous? Of the snarling monster living in my head?”
Chase tossed me the ball and sank onto the couch, the same one Rick had when we’d first moved in with him. Shit brown with pale-yellow pinstriping. “She’s always been all about you. Never looked twice at me. Even after all this time.”
“And that drives you crazy, doesn’t it?” I seethed.
Chase threw his hands up. “No arguments here, man. It did drive me nuts. I don’t get the appeal. You’re so dark and broody. I’m fun and charming.”
“And a prick that’ll f*ck anything that walks.” I added, throwing the ball back with more force than necessary.
“Is it my fault chicks find me irresistible? They always have.” He rolled the ball between his hands, then tossed it back.
“The girls you got, I never wanted.”
“And the one you got, I did.”
There was no point in talking about it. If Sam found out the truth she’d be horrified—and who could blame her? I was a monster unworthy of love and compassion. Someone like her deserved to live in the light. Not stay hidden away in the dark. “Sam and I have no future together. Do whatever the f*ck you want.”