RISK(67)

"This one is for Daddy." She carefully clips the earring on his left ear, taking extra time to adjust it correctly. She softly kisses his cheek before she clips the other to her right ear.

"They're pretty, Ellie." She looks at Nolan. "Is she safety, Daddy? Can I hug her?"

"She's safe," he says quietly with a dip of his chin and an arch of his brow.

I answer the silent question he poses to me. "I'd love a hug, May."





Chapter 45


Nolan




"It's not L E, May." I write Ellie's name out on a piece of white paper sitting on my lap. "It's Ellie. See the letters I wrote here?"

May scoots out of Ellie's lap and crawls across the couch to land in mine. "Oh, Daddy. I see."

I look over at Ellie's colorful palm. May ran to her bedroom to get her markers as soon as we'd finished our pancakes. She set to work on Ellie's palm, drawing a picture of a monkey, a star and finishing it with Ellie's name written as it sounds, L E.

"It was a good guess, May." Ellie smiles at her. "It sounds like it's just an L and an E."

"My name has three letters," May announces proudly. "Daddy is teaching me the letters, so when I go to school, I'll be the smartie."

"I think you're great at writing the letters and drawing pictures."

May beams at Ellie's words. "I can draw you a picture of me. I'll get more paper."

With that, she bounces out of my lap and heads down the hallway toward her bedroom.

"You're f*cking amazing," I whisper across the couch to Ellie. "She's crazy about you. I am too."

Her eyes light up. "She's a beautiful little girl, Nolan."

I was fishing for an 'I'm crazy about you too, Nolan,' but my apparently my bait game isn't strong enough.

"Do you need anything, sir," Tilde, one of May's nannies, comes out from the kitchen. "My shift ends in thirty minutes. I've prepped a bedtime snack for May. You'll find that in the refrigerator. She had tidied her room before you arrived home earlier. I think that's everything."

"You're free to go." I glance at Ellie before I turn back to Tilde. "I'm taking May to a museum tomorrow so I won't need you until four. You can let the staff know they have the morning off."

Ellie shifts uncomfortably in her seat. I was worried when she didn't arrive at five. By the time my watch signaled its daily alarm at five thirty I was convinced she wouldn't show. I was resigned to eating alone with May at six, as I do most days, but then the light tapping on the door erased all my doubt.

"Karen is here for the night." Tilde picks up an empty glass from the coffee table. "Enjoy your evening."

I watch Ellie as Tilde walks away. She follows her every step, not turning back to me until Tilde is out of sight.

"Tell me what you're thinking." I inch closer to her. "You look so serious. Something is going on in that head of yours."

She looks down at her hands in her lap. "It's a lot to take in. This apartment, your staff, May. It's so much, Nolan."

I know it is. Even though I was the one who cooked the pancakes, the chef I'd hired to prepare meals for May and I stood nearby. One of my housekeeping staff swooped in to clear the dishes even though I've asked them repeatedly not to do that. I want my daughter to take on more chores. Loading the dishes into the dishwasher is a task that May enjoys. The silverware is off limits for now, until she's old enough to understand safe handling of the forks and knives.

"It's just May and me that you need to worry about," I reassure her quietly. "You came here to see us. She's having a great time, Ellie. I want you to have fun too."

"I found some paper," May exclaims as she races around the corner from the hallway. "I'll draw you a picture of me that you can take home."

Ellie smiles as May climbs back into her lap. "That's the best gift in the world. I'll keep it forever."

***

"May will be asleep in a couple of hours, Ellie." I rest my hands on her shoulders. "I can give you the key for the shoebox and you can hang out there."

She looks over to where Dino is standing guard at his desk. "It's been a long day, Nolan. A great day but I'm exhausted. I think I should head home for the night."

I don’t want that. It's not just because I'm aching to be inside her again. I want time alone with her after what happened today. She met my daughter. She stepped willingly into my life and didn't run in the opposite direction.

She hugged May as she was leaving my apartment. May hugged her back, tightly. She kissed Ellie on the cheek and told her that she hoped they could be friends. Ellie nodded because the emotion she was feeling was too much. I saw the tears beading in the corners of her eyes. I saw her knees shake as she crouched down to hold May close.

"You can rest at the shoebox until I get there."

"Until you get there?" She grins. "What will happen when you get there?"

"I can draw you a picture on your hand." I whip a purple marker out of my back pocket. "May didn't touch your right hand, so there's plenty of room for me to draw my…"