Pushing Perfect(70)

“We’ll start with sodas, and a plate of nachos for the table,” Justin said. “Everyone?”

We all nodded.

The waitress gave us a big smile and went off to get our drinks. I finally steeled myself to look over at Becca. She, thankfully, wasn’t looking back at me; she was staring down at the table, which wasn’t like her. I wondered if she was scared. I would be, if I were her. I already was, myself. Just being at the table with her made me nervous. I wondered whether it would rise to the level of panic, whether I’d get that head-throbbing feeling, but something about sitting between Alex and Raj made me feel a little better.

The six of us waited quietly for our sodas to arrive. Technically Alex and I had been the ones to call for this meeting, but it didn’t feel like we were in charge now that Isabel had brought Becca into the mix. Once the waitress came back with our order and left, I waited for someone to start talking. But the silence continued, broken only by the sound of mariachi music piped through the speakers.

“Is anyone going to say anything?” Justin asked finally. “I feel like I’m the only one with nothing to volunteer here, so someone get this party started.”

“Not me,” Raj said. “I’m in the same position you are. Though I’m very curious to hear from Isabel.” He could have cut himself shaving on the sharpness in his voice.

“Fine,” she said. “You all went off without me and did your little detective thing and forgot to tell me what was going on. So I took matters into my own hands. Becca’s dad is a lawyer, and—”

“You did not tell Becca’s dad what’s going on,” I said, horrified. I loved Becca’s parents. The thought of them knowing what I’d done was almost as bad as my own parents finding out.

“I’m not an idiot. I told Becca everything I knew, and then I made Justin tell us the rest once I realized you were never going to call me back. She asked her dad about it as one of those things he likes, that thing lawyers always do, you know—”

“A hypothetical,” Becca said. It was the first time I’d actually heard her voice in so long, but it was almost as familiar to me as my own.

“Like he wouldn’t be curious why you were asking,” Alex said. “Seriously. We’re all so screwed I can’t even stand it.”

“She told him she was doing research for a school paper,” Isabel said. “She’s not an idiot.”

“He didn’t ask questions,” Becca said, her voice low. “He just answered mine.”

“What exactly did you tell him?” I asked. They were the first words I’d spoken to her in over a year, and they weren’t the ones I’d imagined when I pictured us talking again. I’d pictured something more like an apology and less like an accusation.

“I asked what would happen if a teacher manipulated students into doing illegal things for her. Like selling drugs.”

“It’s not that simple,” Raj said.

“I’m not done,” she said. “He told me that what the teacher had done was a very serious crime, and the police and the district attorney would treat it that way. So I asked about the students, whether they’d get in trouble too. He said it was possible, but if they were all under eighteen and they all had basically the same story, then they’d probably be able to make a deal. Probation, maybe, and they could get the record sealed so it didn’t hurt them later.”

“You can’t be sure of that,” I said.

“And that doesn’t factor in the possibility that she could turn on us,” Alex said. “I don’t think we’re the only ones involved, by a long shot.”

“You’re not getting it,” Becca said, and I recognized the tone she used when she got frustrated. “You guys are small potatoes here. Nothing any of you did is that big a deal. What she did is horrendous. She’s a teacher, which means she’s a state employee, and she’s in a position of trust. Which she totally took advantage of.” Her voice softened. “She had power over you, and she abused it. I get that you guys all feel bad about what you did, but you didn’t hurt anyone.”

I wasn’t sure she was right about not hurting anyone. Who knew what kinds of terrible things might have come from what Ms. Davenport had made us do? I’d been lucky that I hadn’t reacted badly to the Novalert, but that might not be true for everyone Raj sold it to. And we had no idea how big this whole thing really was.

But what Becca said about power spoke to me. She’d said what I was feeling about Ms. Davenport taking advantage of us, only better than I could say it. “I want to get the power back,” I said. “And I think we can do it.”

“I’m not going to the police,” Isabel said. “I don’t care what Becca’s dad says about us not getting in trouble. I’m not willing to take the chance. And if you do it without me, I’ll tell them you’re lying.”

“I get the no cops thing,” I said. “You’ve made that clear from the beginning. But I don’t think we need the cops to get what we want. Becca’s right—what we have on her is way worse than what she has on us. We have the picture of her getting the drugs from Mark.”

“That makes Mark look worse than her,” Justin said.

“I thought you didn’t care,” Alex said.