Perfect for You(21)

I back away. “You dragged me in here. It’s not like I had a choice.”

“You always have a choice. I told you I won’t make you do anything you don’t want to do. You ran into my arms after the match. You could’ve walked right back out of this empty trainer’s office, but you didn’t. You don’t have to let me touch you like this.” He runs his finger down my cheek. “But you do. Because you like me.”

Holy crap. He’s right. I let him do all those things. I could stop him. I could make him leave me alone, but I’m not. “Noah, I—”

He leans in close so our lips are only inches apart. “If you love Ash so much, why are you hanging out with me? Why aren’t you telling me to go away? Why aren’t you going to stop me from kissing you right now?”





Chapter Ten


I freeze. His lips are moving in slow motion toward me. He’s giving me the chance to say no. Say no! Say no!

“Noah.” That’s all I can manage.

He pulls away. My head leans back against the wall, and I close my eyes. What am I doing? I look at him, begging for answers. “Why didn’t you kiss me?” I’m not complaining that he didn’t do it. I just want to know why he didn’t do it. I mean, I didn’t exactly say no.

“I told you. I won’t do anything you don’t want me to do. You wouldn’t have stopped me. I think you would’ve even kissed me back. But that’s not how I want to kiss you. I want you to want to kiss me.”

What if I do? “I have to go.” I turn and run from the office, bumping right into Grayson.

“Ow! Watch my hair. I just fixed it.” She looks at me, the horror on my face registering. “Where were you? Are you okay?”

No, I’m not okay. I’m a mess. I’m falling apart. I’m a terrible person. “I went to ice my shoulder.” Great, now I’m lying to my best friend.

“Is it bothering you?”

“For a while now. Nothing major.”

She nods. “Maybe I should ice, too. Hang on a sec. Let me grab a bag for the car ride to the diner.”

“No!” I grab her arm. Noah’s still in there. If she sees him, she’ll know I wasn’t icing.

Her face scrunches in confusion. “What’s up with you?”

“I don’t want to keep Tucker waiting. He’s probably already at the diner.”

She smiles, forgetting my little outburst. “Eek!” Her shriek is ear-piercing. “Don’t want to keep him waiting too long.” She takes off, dragging me with her.

Ash has his car pulled up to the courts. “Tucker’s on his way.”

I hop in the front, and Grayson gets in the back seat.

“You’re still in uniform,” Ash says, eying her in the rearview mirror.

“I know. Tucker mentioned he thought our skirts were cute.”

“So what took you so long to get ready?”

Oh, Ash. Wrong question.

Grayson goes off on the primping rituals of the teenage girl. Ash looks to me for help, but I laugh. It’s too funny to intervene. Besides, laughing at Gray and Ash takes my mind off Noah and how close he came to kissing me. Was he right? Would I have let him do it? Would I have kissed him back? I don’t know, and the thought makes me sick to my stomach.

Ash reaches for my hand, lacing his fingers through mine. “You okay? You got quiet all of a sudden.”

“Yeah, I’m replaying a few things in my head.”

“Coach tells us we should replay the games in our heads, too. It helps you figure out what you did well and what you did wrong.”

Yeah, like how not pushing Noah away was wrong. I can’t find a single thing I did that was right. Maybe telling Noah I had plans with Ash tonight, but that seems so minor in comparison.

I’m barely there through dinner, not that anyone really notices with Grayson giving us the play by play of her match. Tucker says he bought a tennis video game and invites Grayson over to play it after we finish here. She’s all smiles.

We say our goodbyes, and Grayson goes with Tucker back to his house to play video games or whatever else they might do. I don’t really want to think about it.

“Want to go to the mountaintop again?” Ash asks.

Can I really pretend everything’s fine after what almost happened? Guilt is tearing at my insides. I didn’t cheat, but was Noah the reason why? It sounds crazy, but he stopped the kiss. He initiated it and stopped it from happening. I can’t let him affect me like this anymore. I have to set him straight. I won’t feel better until I do. “I’m not sure I’m feeling so great.”

“You’re not sure?” He glances at me before turning back to the road. “Was it something you ate?”

“No, I just don’t feel like myself.”

“You beat Kendra, didn’t you?”

“Kendall. Her name’s Kendall.”

“Right. She’s your toughest competition. You should be ready to celebrate.”

“I’m kind of tired. Wiped from the match.”

“You want me to take you home?” He couldn’t sound more disappointed.

I’m ruining everything. It doesn’t matter how I feel. I have to pull it together for Ash. “You know, you’re right. Let’s go do something.”