Perfect Little World(100)
Kalina had wanted to call child services on the Gipsons, but Dr. Grind knew that there was no real legal way to bring Eli back to the complex and there was nothing to be gained by making problems for Jeremy and Callie. They needed to keep the lines of communication open. The complex would still purchase fruits and vegetables from the family, and Dr. Grind had even allowed that Eli could commute to and from the complex for his schooling, but Callie had told him that she would now be homeschooling Eli and that they also wanted him to spend more time working on the farm.
On the night Callie took Eli from the complex, Jeremy having never shown his face since the night Ellen tried to kill herself, there had been no mention to the other children that Eli would be leaving. After dinner, when the families returned to their own houses, Callie and Eli had simply hung back with Dr. Grind and the fellows. Eli hugged Dr. Grind, who told Eli that he could visit any time that he wanted, though Eli seemed to disbelieve this offer, merely frowned and turned back to Callie. Jill was crying and Kalina was holding on to her as Callie and Eli walked to the driveway, where a truck was idling by the curb, waiting for them. Jeffrey shook his head and spoke of how this development would affect their studies, how it would create instability in the outcomes, but Dr. Grind barely listened. He focused instead on the taillights of the truck as it disappeared down the long driveway, the trees swallowing it up. Now, not by magic or careful design but rather the imperfect nature of all human interaction, the family was less by three people.
In the morning, when the children saw that Eli was no longer there, the fellows had anticipated another outburst, the children locking themselves in a room or refusing to eat food, but they seemed to accept the diminishment without emotion. Their world, Dr. Grind understood, had been damaged, and the children seemed to understand, earlier than he had ever hoped, that more woe would probably follow.
“We’re leaving,” Harris Tilton informed Dr. Grind. A month had passed since Ellen’s hospitalization and she was now due to be released and returned to the complex.
“Of course,” Dr. Grind answered, showing not the slightest bit of surprise, “you have to know that I think this is a bad idea.”
Harris nodded. “I appreciate everything that you’ve done for us. I know that Ellen’s situation is not your fault in any way, and you’ve made our lives so much better than they would have been without you, but this place is toxic for Ellen, even with Jeremy gone. She doesn’t want to come back; she doesn’t want to be reminded of what happened and she doesn’t want to see the other members of the family. She wants to start over. She needs a fresh start with her real family.”
“What about Marnie?” Dr. Grind asked. “It will be a huge change for her, to lose her brothers and sisters, to lose access to the other parents.”
“I’ve been talking to her. She understands what’s going on. She misses her mother. She’s willing to trade the complex in order to have Ellen back.”
“Why should she have to choose, Harris?” Dr. Grind asked, a hint of desperation now entering his voice.
“Because,” Harris said, starting to cry, “everyone has to choose at some point. You can’t have everything, Dr. Grind, right? Why does it matter if we leave tomorrow as opposed to a few years from now? This wasn’t intended to last forever.”
“Well, the intention was that the members of this family would stay in contact after the project ended, to form a network of support even beyond this place.”
“No reason that still can’t happen. I care about this place, Dr. Grind. I hope you know that. I love those kids and I really care for the people I’ve met while we’ve lived here. But, and I hate to say this because I know it might upset you, they are not my real family. Ellen and Marnie are my real family, and they have gone through some really unpleasant shit and my responsibility is to fix that.”
“And you don’t want our help?” Dr. Grind offered.
“Not now,” Harris said, having collected himself, his eyes still red.
“When will you leave?” Dr. Grind asked.
“I’ve rented a house in Murfreesboro, near my work. Marnie and I will move in five days. Then Ellen will be released a few days after that. I’ve already enrolled Marnie at an elementary school. My insurance from work will cover Ellen’s continuing treatment. We’ll be fine, I promise.”
“When do you want to tell the other members?” Dr. Grind asked.
“I was hoping you would tell them,” Harris offered, as if he was giving Dr. Grind a thoughtful gift. “After we leave.”
Dr. Grind could not even manage to stand; he merely shook Harris’s hand and watched as the man walked out of his office. Jill walked by his door a few minutes later, holding up her hands as if to ask what the outcome was, but Dr. Grind shook his head and Jill understood that now was not the time to discuss it. Dr. Grind removed a piece of paper from his desk, a crude family tree that contained all the members of the Infinite Family. On the sheet, where Jeremy and Callie and Eli had been penciled in, Dr. Grind had cut out their names with an X-Acto knife, leaving a hole in the paper. He now took out the knife and carefully, with great precision, cut out the names of Ellen, Harris, and Marnie. He took the square that he had cut out and placed it in the drawer of his desk, next to the Gipson family’s square. He laid the sheet flat on his desk and traced his fingers along the lines that connected the remaining families. He felt the odd sensation of his fingertips touching the slick surface of his desk through the holes he had cut from the paper. He returned his gaze to the box that held Izzy’s name, circling it with his finger, over and over, as if hoping he could make a halo of light appear around her, illuminating the room.