Over the Edge (Bridge #3)(43)

I nodded with a breathy sigh. “Yeah. Definitely.”



The lights buzzed and flickered above us. I rolled to my side, molding myself against Ian’s warm body. His eyes were closed, and one muscled arm rested over his forehead.

I was still reeling—from the multiple orgasms, and even more from the way I was falling hard for him. My heart hurt when I thought that maybe the affection I felt for him could be totally one-sided. Then I thought about his words…that he wanted to love me. He was too smart, too seasoned with women and protecting his heart to say something like that without meaning it.

I was falling for Ian too, but how could I love him with half my heart?

Will knew I was meeting Ian tonight, but that didn’t allay the sliver of guilt that took root. Still, Will had pushed for this. We’d all walked into it with our eyes open.

Didn’t change the fact that every time we were together felt like a free fall into feelings I wasn’t completely ready for.

I drew circles on Ian’s chest, marveling at how far we’d come in such a short time.

He moved his arm and looked over to me. “What are you thinking about, baby?”

I exhaled deeply and followed my thoughts to the last time we’d been together. The night had ended in Will’s bed, only because Ian had left. I hadn’t mentioned it, but his absence had bothered me more than I wanted to admit.

I released the frown I was holding and sighed. The rules were changing at every turn, and Ian’s absence right now, after what we’d just shared, would gut me.

“The last time we were together…you left. I wasn’t sure what to think about that.”

“I figured Will wanted his time with you. That’s all. My schedule is a mess with work. Most nights I don’t sleep really well, so I usually go out. I go for a walk or grab a drink before I turn in.”

I was silent a moment. His reasons were sound, but that didn’t change that I wanted to be close to him.

“Did it bother you?”

I shrugged. “I guess I felt a little vulnerable after what we did. I didn’t know what to expect. Now I do.”

He turned to his side, facing me with his head propped on his elbow. “I’ll stay next time. I like this—being close to you, touching you.” He captured my nipple between his fingertips, teasing the hard tip before cupping my breast gently.

His tender touch threatened to rev me up all over again. The few guys I’d been with in the past were always once and done. Will had turned that expectation on its head, challenging my stamina while more than proving his own. I had a feeling Ian wasn’t much different, and a part of me wanted to find out.

“I care about you, Liv. Never doubt that,” he said, his eyes turning serious. “Will does too. You’re important. What we have here, it’s important to both of us.”

“I know. I guess I’m still trying to wrap my head around everything that’s happening with us.”

With the return to coherent thought, I was thrust into the odd reality that I was sleeping with two men. Two very different men. The way they carried themselves, the way they smelled and f*cked and talked was uniquely them. They shared an apartment, a passion for unbridled sex, and me.

Ian brought his hand to my chin and lifted my gaze to his. “I want you to be happy, Liv. You just have to tell me what you want, okay?”

My chest tightened. “You seem to already know.”

Tonight had been amazing in so many ways.

“Ian, you don’t know what tonight means to me.” I swallowed over the emotion rising to the surface again. “I can’t explain it. It’s been so long since I’ve painted. Losing that part of my life has been kind of devastating. You’re the first person who’s ever noticed anything was missing.”

He held my gaze for a moment. “I know what it’s like to live with that kind of emptiness. I don’t want that for you. You’re talented, truly. It’s a goddamn crime if you let anything stop you.”

Tears stung my eyes. I hid them by nuzzling into his shoulder. His strong arms came around me like they belonged there. I settled against him with a shaky sigh, feeling grateful and safe and cherished all at once. He held me tight, his strength surrounding me as silence stretched between us.

We lay that way, entwined and lazily caressing each other as the seconds turned to minutes. I traced the jagged edges of his tattoo. After a moment, he caught my hand and brought my fingertips to his lips, gently kissing them.

“Tell me about your dad,” I whispered.

He turned his stare to the ceiling, his expression becoming taut. “I don’t really like talking about it.”

I let our fingers slide together and rest on his chest, under his heartbeat, strong and steady. “Is that why you don’t let yourself get close to people?”

He was silent a moment, and I worried that I was pushing too far.

“Maybe,” he finally said. “I trust you, Liv. It just hurts. I want to be stronger than the grief, you know? It’s not easy to show that side of myself to someone else. Especially someone I want to be strong for.”

I lifted up on my elbow and stared down into his beautiful eyes. I stroked down his nose and over his full lips before kissing him.

“I know you’re strong,” I whispered against him. “And I think sometimes allowing yourself to feel it all makes you even stronger, even if it hurts. You don’t need to prove anything to me.”