Off the Record (Off #3)(62)

The mere fact that Linc had the power to make me cry brought a startling revelation to myself. Yes, he’s the one.

Linc Caldwell believes in the power of love. And now, so do I. My only regret is that I hope my actions have not caused Linc to become the jaded soul that I once was. I hope he understands that he is beyond magnificent and he should never change his ways.

I hope he will forgive me for the pain I caused him. But actually, I know he will. Because the power of forgiveness is not something that Linc Caldwell needs to be taught. He is the one that taught it to me.

If by some chance I have hurt him beyond repair, and he will not give me the forgiveness I so desperately need, I want him to know that I will continue to lead my life by the lessons he taught me. He needs to know that he helped me to fix myself, and I will never fail to live up to the new expectations he has helped me to desire.

There is really no way to end this article, except to tell Linc that I love him. I love him more than is humanly possible to love another creature. He asked me to follow him once, and I said no. I just want him to know that I am ready. That I will follow him to the ends of the earth if he will have me.

Linc, if you give me the chance, I will spend every day of my life making sure you understand how much I love you.”

As I finish, I realize that tears are streaming down my face. It’s hard to believe just a few short weeks ago, I would have never let them fall. It’s cathartic, and no matter what Linc does from this moment forward, I vow that I will never hold them back again.

Linc doesn’t move. His eyes stay closed, and his face looks...pained. I wait, and I wait. Nothing.

My heart plummets and my stomach rolls over. I have failed and Linc is not willing to give me a second chance. I deserve it, I know. But it doesn’t make it hurt any less.

I stand on shaky legs and pick up my purse. Walking to the door, I feel my heart breaking with every move. Cracking and tearing open, shredded beyond repair. Just as I reach out for the doorknob, I feel his hand on my shoulder.

It’s warm and soft. Then he slightly grips it, turning me around. I keep my eyes on the floor because I’m afraid of what I may see. Is it a goodbye? Will it be the forgiveness I need in his eyes? Could my hope beyond hope of love be reflected?

His hands come to my face and gently cradle me. He uses his thumbs to wipe the moisture that is still raining.

“Look at me, Ever,” he softly commands.

I drag my eyes up and I almost reel backward from the blazing emotion that is hitting me. It’s almost too powerful for me to understand. My heart is thumping madly in my chest.

Linc leans in and softly kisses my lips, tasting the salt of my tears. I can’t help the grateful sigh that seeps out. The kiss deepens and I feel like I’ve come home.

Pulling away is hell, but I need him to hear it from my lips. “I love you so much, Linc. I am destroyed without you.”

He smiles at me and it’s gentle. “I know, baby. I got the message.”

“Please say you forgive me. I need you to forgive me.” A sob comes out and I could slap myself, because I don’t want to give into my extreme angst right now. I want to relish every bit of this conversation.

He pulls me into his chest and just hugs me, smoothing his fingertips over my back. His lips touch the top of my head, and he says, “There’s nothing to forgive. My girl loves me, and I love her. That’s all we need.”

Relief rushes through me and I squeeze him tightly. My words are muffled in his chest and I hope he understands when I tell him, “I’m so sorry. So sorry for hurting you. I will never hurt you again. Please believe me.”

Linc draws away. “Shh. Enough of regrets. We’re moving forward, okay?”

“Yes...forward. Thank you so much for giving me a chance.”

Linc takes one of my hands and kisses it gently. “Ever...you are a very brave woman. I know you have very sound reasons for rejecting love. I know how scary it is for you. I’m just amazed at your spirit, and your determination. You...humble me actually.”

Oh, God. I never thought Linc could say such simple words that would practically knock the breath out of me, but he succeeds. I don’t even know how to respond to the compliments he just paid me.

I shake my head. “No, you’re the one that humbles me. You’ve understood me when no one else really has...”

I trail off, at a loss of words to say anything more. I’m overwhelmed by his absolute love and generosity. And for just a split second, I feel unworthy of his love but then I chase those thoughts away. We are made for each other, and I’m going to live the rest of my life basking in that knowledge.

My mouth is captured by his again, and our tongues immediately start dueling.

“I missed you so much,” Linc growls into my mouth. “Don’t you ever f*cking leave me again. Because I’ll hunt you down and tie you up if I have to.”

Shivers run up and down my spine at his words. They are possessive, and I find myself wanting to be possessed.

“I missed you too,” I tell him and then gently suck on his lower lip. “How about you take me into your bedroom right now and I’ll let you tie me up anyway.”

“Fuck yeah, that’ll work.”

Linc picks me up, winding my legs around his waist. After one more scorching kiss, he walks toward his bedroom, and I know that I’ve definitely come home.