Maudlin's Mayhem (Bewitching Bedlam #2)(22)

“Why?”

“Because it’s not formulated for human bodies.” It seemed the easiest explanation all the way around. I swept the cans off the counter, handing them to Thornton. “I’ll make you something to eat.” At Thornton’s laugh, I turned around. “I can cook eggs. I can make a sandwich.”

“Why don’t you and Bubba sit down at the table and I’ll make him a sandwich.” Thornton shooed us out of the kitchen proper.

I led Bubba over to the kitchen table and motioned for him to sit down. “So. Bubba, can you tell me anything about what happened? Did someone come in the room? Do you know if they cast a spell on you? Earlier today you didn’t seem to be feeling well. What was wrong?”

Bubba tilted his head, staring at me sideways. “You look different now. Smaller.” He paused, then said, “I remember feeling tired and I just wanted to sleep. When I woke up, everything looked different.” He wrinkled his nose. “My nose—something’s wrong. I can’t smell nearly as much as usual.”

“That’s because humans don’t have the ability to smell as much as a cat does, Bub. And even though you’re a cjinn, your body’s used to doing cat-stuff.”

Thornton brought over the sandwich and set it down in front of Bubba just as Aegis came in the backdoor. He took one look at Bubba, who was still wearing the robe and boxers, and his jaw dropped.

Bubba poked at the sandwich. “How do I eat that?”

“Pick it up in your paws…your hands. Hold it, and bite into it,” Thornton said, showing him how to hold the sandwich.

I motioned for Aegis to follow me into the dining room. “We have a problem.”

“What happened?” Aegis peeked around me, staring back into the kitchen. “Are you sure that’s him? Bubba is a California boy?”

“Apparently so. And yeah, trust me. Bubba tried to groom himself and it was obvious he hadn’t realized that he wasn’t as bendy as he usually is. He’s scared and he’s grumpy.” My smile faded. “I have to find out what’s going on. The only person I can think of who might try to do this to him is Snow—and I confronted her. I’m convinced it wasn’t her. Or maybe Ralph.”

“Why would Ralph turn Bubba into a human?” Aegis paused. “Don’t tell me you went over there? Maddy, I thought we talked about this—”

“No, you talked about it. And for what it’s worth, Snow wants a little bit of payback on Ralph as well. I don’t think she appreciates her starring role in Snow White and the Seven Whorves.” I shook my head. “But Ralph couldn’t have done this either, because I came home from his place to find Bubba transformed. I’m worried about him. What if this is permanent? What if he’s really sick?”

“Call the doctor and ask if he can see you for an emergency visit. I’ll pay for it.” Aegis motioned to my phone. “Go on, call.”

The front door opened and Sandy came in. I motioned for her to talk to Aegis as I put in a call to Dr. Farrows and begged him to come over.

“He’ll be here in twenty minutes,” I said as I hung up.

Aegis had filled Sandy in while I was on the phone and now, she was staring into the kitchen. “I can’t believe that’s Bubba,” she whispered.

“Believe it. And I want to know how and why. Let’s go in. I warn you, he’s still very much Bubba the cat.” I glanced at Aegis, who smiled.

Thornton was back at the counter with Bubba’s sandwich. “Apparently, Bubba does not like pickles. Or tomatoes.”

“More meat. And whatever that white goop is, I don’t like it.” Bubba was examining his nails. “Why are these so short?”

“Because—white goop?”

“Mayo,” Thornton said. “Noted: Bubba doesn’t like pickles, tomatoes, or mayo.”

Aegis pulled me aside. “Before I forget, here—put this in your purse.”

I glanced at the piece of paper. It was a check for twenty-five thousand dollars. “You have to be joking.”

“Nope. That should tide you over till they get your money back, and if it doesn’t, there’s more where that came from. Put it in your purse and don’t leave it lying around.” He sat down next to Bubba. “Hey, Bubba. You know who I am?”

“Vampire. Aegis. You do things to Maddy.” His eyes flashed.

“Enough about that!” I dove into the conversation. “We really don’t need to rehash what you’re used to watching.” I decided right then and there, once we had Bubba back into his usual form, he wasn’t going to hang out in the bedroom with us when we were having sex. Nope.

Sandy stifled a laugh. “Bubba, did Maddy ask you if any strangers came near you today? Or even last night? Or, did anybody rub your belly and make a wish?”

Bubba pulled open his robe to flash his six-pack abs. “You want to rub mah belleh?” His eyes were wide as he patted his stomach.

“I swear, it’s like breathing, isn’t it?” Sandy glanced over at me.

I nodded. “I think getting people to rub his belly is an innate part of his nature.” To Bubba, I said, “Close the robe, Bubs. We’re not rubbing your belly. Why do you even want your belly rubbed?”

Bubba smiled at me. “Because, you rub my belly, I make your wishes happen. It’s what I do. Maddy, I don’t like being human.” He rubbed his belly, but nothing happened and his smile slid away and he started fidgeting, looking anxious. Before I could answer, he had slid under the table with his new, meat-heavy sandwich.