Luscious (Topped #1)(23)

“Ally, I don’t understand. Baby, you’re going to have to tell me what you want from me because I can’t read your mind. I’ve kept my hands to myself all week because it seems like you only want to be friends, but I have to say, it feels like more right now. If I’m reading you wrong, I would like for you to tell me. I care about you. A lot. If you don’t feel the same way, please tell me. It doesn’t mean we can’t be friends. It doesn’t mean you can’t stay here. I simply need to adjust my expectations.”

Her head moved against his chest like she was trying to find the right spot. She settled her ear right over his heart. “Have you ever wanted something, but you know you probably can’t have it?”

“Baby, I haven’t been playing coy. If you want me all you have to do is ask.” He smoothed a hand down her hair, enjoying the rich feel of it. Like spun silk. “But you should know that while I don’t have to top you to have a relationship with you, all my friends are into the lifestyle. If that’s going to bother you, maybe we should talk about it.”

“Or maybe you should show me and I’ll promise to try not to let the fact that my dad was an atrocious human being ruin this, too.” Her face turned up, her eyes still shining with tears. “I’m not usually like this, Macon. I promise. I’m not so damaged that I can’t have a relationship. And I know I pulled back this week, but I wanted you to know me. I thought it was a bad idea to jump into bed with you. I didn’t want to be just another woman you went to bed with.”

“Uhm, baby, you seem to have gotten the wrong impression of me. I haven’t been to bed with anyone but my right hand in well over a year and honestly, there hasn’t even been much of that. I was stationed in Afghanistan and then I came home to divorce papers. So you wouldn’t be another woman. You would be one of two.”

Her eyes widened. “Two?”

He nodded and kind of wished he was the stud she thought he was. He was about to ruin that impression. “I married Elise when I was eighteen. I’ve never slept with anyone else. So if you’re looking for an incredible amount of experience, you won’t find it with me. You should know that. After the accident, well, there aren’t a lot of women out there looking for a broke, divorced, one-legged veteran.”

“One and a quarter legs. We have to use all our assets, Miles.” She went up on her toes. “I want you so badly. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted a man the way I want you. I want to be enough for you.”

It was all he could possibly have asked for. He leaned over and brushed their lips together. “You are. And you don’t need to come with me. Like I said, I don’t need to top you to be with you. I’ll drop the cake off and come back here. We’ll play with the kids and maybe later tonight we’ll make out and see where things go. I don’t want to push you. This relationship is important to me.”

She hugged him again. “It’s important to me, too. And that’s why I want to go. I want to see. Will they let me watch? Or will they think I’m a total perv for wanting to watch?”

“Oh, that house is full of happy perverts right now.” He sighed, hoping he wasn’t making a mistake. “I’d already asked if I could bring you. Big Tag agreed. You’re welcome, but you’re coming in with me and that means there are some rules.”

“Do I call you Sir? I caught that, you know.” At least she sounded happy again.

“No. You call me Macon and you stay close to me. If I give you an order, it’s for your safety and the safety of the others. This is a private play party. There are going to be different scenes going on in various rooms of the house, though most people will be in the dungeon. And there will be naked people. If this was Sanctum, you wouldn’t be allowed to come in street clothes.”

“I don’t have anything sexy.”

“You’re sexy exactly the way you are.” He loved her in jeans and a T-shirt or her Top uniform or her PJs.

“You say the sweetest things, Miles.” She glanced back up at him and gave him a tremulous smile. “I’m crazy about you. I want this to work.”

He cupped her cheeks and held her still for a long kiss. He molded his lips to hers, going slow and savoring every moment. He couldn’t ask for more than an honest chance with her. “I’m crazy about you, too.”

He dipped his head down again. The cake could wait a few minutes more.





She clung to Macon’s hand and it wasn’t really about being afraid. She could finally hold it. She could finally feel their fingers threading together. She moved closer to him as they ventured out of the dining room after putting the finishing touches on the buffet. It was gorgeous. Macon hadn’t made everything, but in her mind his were the tastiest. In addition to the cake and a plate of tiny lemon angel food cakes with a dash of lemon confit, he’d made three types of hummus, put together a charcuterie board and a cheese plate, and a lovely selection of crudités. She’d helped him with the variety of vegetables, cutting them the way he taught her to.

She loved living with Macon. She was fairly certain she was falling in love with Macon. Maybe it was a mistake, maybe she was being na?ve, but he couldn’t have hurt her brother. She wanted the truth, but she was no longer sure she wanted it at the price of her relationship with him.