Lost Along the Way(12)
Cara had started selling real estate in town years ago, and her job was the only thing in her life that kept her sane. She had always loved real estate and architecture and all the promise that a new home could hold. She loved meeting people who actually listened to her and valued what she had to say. Her clients made her feel important, like she had a purpose in life other than being Reed Chase’s wife. She liked making her own money, even if it all went into their joint account; she knew that she contributed, and in her mind that meant she remained independent. Of course, the job had the added benefit of keeping her busy and out of the house for a few hours every day, something that she needed more than ever now that she couldn’t spend time visiting her mother. Truth be told, while she loved her job, she’d have worked for the garbage company if it meant she could get away from Reed.
If she ever told anyone that he made her feel this way, they’d think she was crazy. Everyone loved Reed and stupidly believed that he was the perfect guy, a persona that he had delicately crafted for his entire life. His leather loafers were never scuffed, his tweed blazers were impeccably tailored, his shirt collars were crisply starched. Over the years Cara realized that it was one of the things that women who didn’t know the first thing about Reed found enticing: that he managed to always look like a J.Crew model. Cara saw them in the grocery store, the women who ignorantly envied her without really knowing anything about her at all. Cara wore her dark hair in a neat, even shoulder-length cut, and her pearls and white button-downs like a uniform, not because she was too lazy to get dressed in anything else in the morning but because she had learned it was the only outfit she could wear that her husband wouldn’t criticize. He liked things clean, orderly, unfussy, and that included her attire. Years ago she had dared to wear patterned shirts and large dangly earrings. One particularly brazen day, she’d donned a zebra-print coat, and the ridicule that rained down on her had been so relentless it made her afraid to descend the stairs in the morning to meet him at the breakfast table. Finally she realized that this particular uniform would allow her to move about without his pulling at the small threads that were left of her self-esteem, and so now it was all she wore.
The women in town called her “classic,” she knew, like she was so stylish and naturally chic that she believed all a woman needed to look her best was minimal makeup, a pair of J Brand jeans, and a stark white shirt. It amazed her how truth can differ so vastly from reality, and how utterly painful it was to be the only person in her entire life who actually knew the truth.
Cara was aware that her mother had never really approved of her being in love with Reed Chase, but when Meg and Jane first met him, they liked him. At least, Meg did. If Cara was honest with herself, she’d admit that Jane was never a fan of Reed, either. Cara had assumed Jane was jealous and ignored her friend’s obvious lack of enthusiasm where her new boyfriend was concerned. In fact, Cara’s assumption that Jane was jealous of her probably marked the beginning of the end of their friendship. The irony was that Cara never took Jane’s opinions all that seriously, and Jane might have been the only person who had the guts to try to point out that Reed might not be the guy he was pretending to be. Back then, Cara thought she knew everything. It became clear over the years that she actually knew nothing.
She met Reed during her junior year of college, and they hit it off immediately. They had so much in common. They were both overachievers with type-A personalities, both athletes, both popular, both more mature than other kids their own age. Cara’s friends at college called Reed “Mr. Wonderful,” always the charmer with the big smile and the jokes and the jovial personality that made everyone want to be near him. When she was home for winter break, Reed came to visit for a weekend. Cara introduced him to Meg and Jane at a party, so happy to have a real man in her life. Jane was right. Staying at Bowdoin was definitely the right decision.
“What kind of name is Reed Chase? It sounds like some sort of rich-people sport involving mallards or racehorses or something,” Jane said when they met for lunch a few days later after Reed had returned home. “He’s good-looking and all, don’t get me wrong, but I don’t know. He seems a little off to me. He’s kind of bossy, isn’t he? He wouldn’t let you refill your beer at the keg last night. Worse than that, you listened to him! What’s that about?”
“He was doing me a favor!” Cara answered in Reed’s defense. “I’d had enough at that point. The last thing I needed was another beer.”
“I don’t know. If you like him I’m happy for you, but he kind of comes across like one of those rich dickheads who thinks he’s better than everyone else,” Jane said.
“So what if his family has money? That’s not why I like him!”
“Only someone who was dating a guy with money would pretend like it didn’t matter,” Jane said. “Just be careful with him, that’s all I’m saying.”
Jane was jealous, and Cara knew it, which bothered her. Friends are supposed to want the best for each other. She didn’t appreciate feeling like she needed to apologize for the universe bringing her and Reed together at a keg party, and she certainly didn’t need to defend him to Jane.
“He’s hot,” Meg chimed in. “That’s what I care about. He’s smoking hot. If I wasn’t madly in love with Steve, I’d totally go for him. On paper he seems just about perfect.”