Letting Go (Thatch #1)(28)

“Grey, it’s okay! Calm down, just focus on taking deep breaths in and out,” Janie said quickly as she moved in front of me.

I hadn’t even realized I’d started hyperventilating until I’d heard her talking. “I can’t yet,” I managed to get out, horrified.

“I know, it’s okay. It’s fine. Jagger knows that too.”

“Shit, Grey, I’m sorry,” Heather said. “I wasn’t thinking. Janie’s right; Jagger knows that. From what you said he isn’t going to rush you into anything. I was just being me and . . . well, it was stupid. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, I just . . . I hadn’t even thought about that. I—God, it’s ridiculous to be scared over that, right?” I laughed, but it sounded off.

“It’s not,” Janie assured me. “All of this is a lot, and it’s happened fast. You’re totally allowed to freak out over things. You made a huge decision tonight, and you don’t have to make the rest of them anytime soon, okay? Just go back to Thatch with him and be yourself. Let everything happen one day at a time, just like how you’ve been taking the last two years, all right?”

I nodded quickly. “Yeah, you’re right.”

One day at a time. I just needed to keep moving.





Chapter 6

Jagger

July 13, 2014



MY PHONE STARTED ringing just before Grey and I came up on the lake separating our town from another, and I slapped my hand around on my passenger seat until I found it. If Grey and I hadn’t already spent the last few hours talking as I followed behind her on the way back to Thatch, I would’ve thought it was her.

“Hello?” I answered without looking at the screen.

“Hey! Miss me yet?”

I rolled my eyes and switched the phone over to my other hand. “I’m pretty sure I’ve been telling you I missed you for the last month, Charlie.”

“Well, I have to make sure you don’t forget about me,” she said teasingly.

“Don’t think that’s possible, sis. How’s the trip?”

“It’s good! We’re having fun, but I think we’re all starting to get tired of cars.”

“I can’t imagine. Grey can barely pull off this three-and-a-half-hour trip without getting bored out of her mind. I don’t know how you all can stand driving across the country and back again.”

There was a pause before Charlie spoke again, this time her voice was hushed. “Grey’s with you?”

“No, she’s in front of me. We’re just about to pull into Thatch.”

“I thought you said she was in Seattle.”

The easy smile I was wearing at the sound of my sister’s voice dropped into a frown at the way she’d said this, like it was an accusation or something. “She was, and now she’s coming back.”

When Charlie spoke again, her words held a harsh tone. “Just a week ago you said you hadn’t heard from her. Why is she coming back with you?”

“Seriously, Charlie? I thought you wanted her back.”

“I did want her to go back to Thatch, I just didn’t expect you to be bringing her back. What changed in the last week?”

“I went and got her. I don’t understand the way you randomly react to Grey. You love her, you want to see her, you’re upset she left . . . and then you’re pissed off that I’m bringing her back and were weird as shit when you both hung out before you left for your trip. I thought you’d be happy . . . for me at the very least. Shit.”

There was another long pause before she asked, “Happy for you? Why would I—what happened to make her come back?”

“Because I finally have the girl I’ve been waiting for my entire f*cking life, Charlie! Now what is your deal?”

“Have her?” she asked quietly. “You’re together?”

I blew out a slow, steadying breath and stared at the car in front of mine. “Yeah, in a way.”

“When did you start dating?” she asked, her voice rising.

“Seriously: What. Is. Your. Deal?”

“Just tell me, Jagger!”

“We didn’t start dating, and I don’t think either of us is going to consider this dating. It’s not like we tried to make it official . . . there’s not really a need to. She knows how I’ve always felt, and I know how she feels, that’s all we need.”

Charlie was silent for so long I started to say her name when she spoke again. There was an odd pain in the tone of her voice, and for the life of me I couldn’t understand it. “I just—I don’t understand . . .” She trailed off.

“What don’t you understand? What is there to understand?”

“Nothing, it’s not a big deal.”

“Really. You sure about that?” I bit out. “Because I could’ve sworn you felt differently.”

“Yes, really. And I am happy for you, Jagger . . . I am.”

“Then wh—”

“You know, I should probably get going,” she said, cutting me off. “We need to check out of this place and I haven’t packed yet, so I’ll talk to you later.”

“Charlie,” I groaned.