Hold My Breath(35)

“It’s because you keep calling me a *!” Maddy shouts.

My lip tugs up, and I laugh quietly, looking down at my feet before moving my eyes to Holly. She shrugs.

“She’s right. I do,” she says, looking back to her friend and cupping her mouth to make her voice come out even louder…as if that’s possible. “Because you’re acting like one!”

I can’t hear Maddy sigh, but I can tell by her shoulders and the way they rise and fall while she holds on to the pool’s edge that she is.

“You know she doesn’t like it when people underestimate her,” I say to her friend, laying my towel on a nearby table and kicking off my slide shoes.

“Just trying to bring out her best,” Holly says, holding her half-eaten bag of chips out for me. I shake my head no and rub my sore abs.

“Trying to bring out my best,” I laugh.

Her mouth curls as she shrugs, and her eyes narrow, her expression shifting to flirtatious. “Yeah, well…it’s working for ya,” she says, eyebrows waggling.

I thought I was too old to blush, but Maddy’s friend may just be the female equivalent of the stereotypical construction worker, and I feel pretty damn objectified.

“All righty,” I say, eyes wide as I stretch my goggles in my hands and turn my attention to the pool. Maddy’s soon approaching my side of the pool and is about to touch the wall, so I step quicker, kneeling by the edge to force her to look at me on her touch. She slows when she notices me, her eyes masked by her tinted goggles, hair tucked under her cap. My brother used to say that all swimmers look the same when you gear us up, but Maddy doesn’t look like anyone else at all—even masked and ready to compete. Her cheekbones are always a little higher, her lips a little pinker, and I’d recognize her form even under the deepest waters. She’s perfection.

“I thought maybe we could sprint together. I know it’s always easier for me when there’s someone in the lane next to me,” I say. I could not possibly be more transparent, and I hear her friend breathe out a laugh behind me. The more seconds that tick by without Maddy’s response, the more see-through I become.

And by sprints being easy, I mean I just want to be near you because I literally cannot get your taste out of my mouth.

I start to stand, but before I make up an excuse to leave, Maddy gives me a slight nod.

“Cool,” I nod back.

She swims a few slow laps while I stretch and warm up, and when I twist to the side, I notice her friend Holly is now chewing on her pen cap, her legs folded in the chair while she stares at me. I wonder if Maddy told her about yesterday?

I do my best to ignore her, but every time I glance her direction, I’m met with her eyes, and a wry grin that she flashes, like I’ve been caught.

“You, Evan and Maddy…you guys were close?” she finally says after locking eyes a dozen more times.

“We were,” I answer quickly, turning the opposite way and stretching an arm that is already limber and loose just to avoid looking at her more.

“Was it always Evan and Maddy, or did you and her…ya know…like, date or anything?”

My head cocks and my mouth hangs open, my stomach tightening as I think of the best way to deflect this, when Maddy steps in before I have to.

“Will is two years older than me, Holly. It would have been weird,” she says.

Weird. I nod to agree with her, but as I get in the pool, I stay under water for a few extra seconds just to mouth the word to myself. Weird. I guess she didn’t say gross, so weird is better, but I never really thought of the idea of a me and her as weird. Two years when I was a senior and she was a sophomore would have been difficult, yeah, but…no…a me and her has always been far from weird.

When I resurface, I hear the middle of her friend’s response.

“I was fifteen and he was five years older than me, and I didn’t find it weird at all,” Holly says.

I twist to look at Maddy, and she just opens her eyes wide and shakes her head at me, urging me not to dig deeper.

“Holly was a little…advanced…in high school,” Maddy says.

“Fuck high school. I was advanced in junior high,” her friend says, her book snapping closed as she stands. “I really should head home to study, Maddy. Maybe Will can take you home? You know…when you two are done with whatever…this is?”

Holly waves her hand above us, her lips pinched like she’s holding in a laugh. I see what she’s doing, and as much as I appreciate that she’s trying to force Maddy and me together…alone, I’m getting a vibe from my other side that alone time isn’t exactly wanted. Unsure how to answer, I turn to Maddy for a sign, some expression that gives me a clue, but Holly—my unrequested wing-woman—doesn’t give me time.

“Great, okay, well…call me later, Mads. Will, as always, been a pleasure. Keep avoiding carbs and making those abs look super sexy, would ya?”

I can only laugh to myself when her friend leaves us alone, and I let my face fall forward so I’m looking at the water.

“I’m pretty sure that falls under sexual harassment,” I chuckle.

“You have no idea how much worse that could have been,” Maddy says. I meet her eyes, and she widens them. “We used to do this thing after big tests. We’d each take turns picking how we’d celebrate. I’d make us splurge and go out to some fancy dinner, or maybe go dancing.”