Hidden Ink (Montgomery Ink #4.5)(30)

“I’ll taint you,” he whispered.

“You can’t, Sloane. Just love me. Love is enough to get us started. We can talk to someone if we need to, but love is enough. It doesn’t heal all wounds, doesn’t make the past go away. It doesn’t heal our scars, doesn’t erase the pain, but it does make it worth it. With you, I know I’m okay. I know I’m loved. Even if you haven’t said it.”

He let out a breath then stepped toward her. She cupped his face with one hand, the other on the blanket before he cupped her face instead. When she wiped the tears from his face he hadn’t known had fallen, he closed his eyes.

“I love you, Hailey. I love all of you, every breath of you, every ounce of your soul. But I’m not worthy of you.”

“You’re a fool, but I love you, too, Sloane. And you don’t get to decide if you’re worthy of me. That’s not how love works. You don’t get to walk away from me, leave me bleeding and in agony because you’re afraid to hurt me. You hurt me anyway, trying to protect me, and I’m not going to let you do that again. You hear me? If you want to leave me, then you do it without lying to me. You do it by saying you don’t love me and you don’t want me.”

He opened his eyes and cursed. “I love you, Hailey. I just damn well said it. Of course, I want you. I can’t breathe with wanting you.”

“Then let that be enough. We can do anything, Sloane. But we have to be together to persevere. You’re a good man, Sloane Gordon. I saw you with Jason. I saw you try to help and know you could only do so much. Don’t become him, Sloane. Help him, but don’t let his pain take away what you have. Don’t fade into the shadows because you feel you should. Step into the light because of those you lost. Show them that their loss was worth it. Show the world that you made it and you live for them, not in spite of them.”

Jesus, he loved this woman. She saw into the heart of him and yet he’d almost lost it all because he was so scared.

“I love you, Hails. I pushed you away before I had you, then did again because I was scared.”

“Don’t do it again,” she whispered, tears sliding down her cheeks in earnest. He wiped them away with his thumbs.

“I f*cked up.”

“Yeah, you did,” she said honestly.

He snorted.

“Don’t do it again. You don’t get to push me away because you’re scared.”

He kissed her then, softly, with everything he had within himself. She kissed him back, and he fell that much more in love with her.

He pulled away and traced one finger down her side and under her breast. “Don’t hide from me either. I know you haven’t, but…”

“But I might. Because it’s scary. I know.” She kissed his chest. “I promise to be open.”

“I’ll never leave you again,” he said softly.

“I want to believe that,” she whispered. “So prove it to me, Sloane. Every day. Prove it to me.”

“Be with me. We’ve hidden everything else in the past, but I’m all me now. You’re all you. We’re bare. You got it? You’re mine. I f*cked up, but I’m not doing it again. I’m going to have you every way I can and I’m not letting go.”

She smiled softly and nodded. “We’ve wasted too many years because we were scared. I’m not going to waste any more.”

He kissed her then, this time deeper. “I love you, Hails.”

“I love you, too. Oh, and happy Valentine’s Day.”

He frowned and thought about the day before letting out a rough chuckle. “Happy Valentine’s Day, baby.”

She let the blanket fall from her fingers and he let out a groan. He hadn’t allowed himself to look at her fully before, but now he took her all in. When she licked her lips, he had to have her.

He crushed his mouth to hers even as she tugged on his shirt. Soon they were stripped down, pressing their bodies together as tightly as possible, hands roaming and grasping. He pulled out a condom from his discarded pants pocket and let her slide it over him. The act almost made him come, but he held strong. Barely. He moved her toward the front door and gripped her thighs.

“I’ve wanted to f*ck you hard against a door since the first time,” he growled.

She bit his lip and opened for him. When he slid inside oh-so-slowly, they both moaned.

“Is it still f*cking when we love each other? Or is it making love?” Her nails dug into his shoulder and he slowly pumped in and out of her.

“I know it’s making love when it’s slow.” He sped up. “When it’s going fast,”—he pounded into her—“when it’s me f*cking you hard. It’s f*cking, loving, and everything in between.”

She bit into her lip and rode him even as he f*cked her into the door, their bodies sweat-slick and their moans rising. When her cunt clamped around him and her eyes darkened, he slammed into her, coming hard with her. He kissed her lips, his body shaking. She kissed him back.

“Love you, Hails. All of you.” He wrapped his arms around her, knowing he’d have to take them down to the floor soon before his legs gave out.

She nipped at his chin, her hands lazily skimming his back. “Love you, too, Sloane. You’re my broody, bearded, inked man. What more could I want?”