Hetch (Men OF S.W.A.T #1)(80)

I couldn’t lose them.

“It’s one thing to ignore me and walk out of my life.”



“Sure you weren’t, Hetch.” Mitch grins because he thinks Liberty and I are still hiding our involvement with one another.

Jesus, I wish it were so simple.

It’s so complicated now that I’m not sure we’ll ever get back.

Knowing I can’t keep thinking about Liberty while focusing on Mitch, I keep my head in the clear, and concentrate on him and the game I vow to give my all.

Later I will figure out how to win her back.

Now I have to win this one.

Two minutes later, Mitch calls, “Checkmate,” and issues a rematch. I take it, and the following two, not because I want to but because I need to.

I have a lot of groveling to do. Both with Mitch and with Liberty.

I just hope Liberty is as forgiving.



“To being reinstated.” Sterling holds up his beer in celebration, once we’ve settled into the back booth of a hole-in-a-wall pub just outside of town.

“Thanks, man.” I reach for my water and tap it against his glass.

“Gonna be good to have you back.”

“You have no idea.” I place my glass back on the table and take stock of the pub Fox picked out.

I've never been here before. With a décor older than The Elephant, it’s bigger in size and subsequently louder.

“Why are we here, again?” My eyes find Fox, Hart, and Tate over by the bar. They’re talking to a group of girls, not in the least bit interested in celebrating my new reinstatement.

“You told me you wouldn’t go back to The Elephant. We had to find a new place.” Sterling shrugs as if it’s a perfectly good reason to change our hang out.

While I’m not sure The Elephant is the issue, I just didn’t want to risk falling into bad habits.

“You didn’t have to do that,” I tell him, wondering if we’re going to address the issues between us.

“You’re the team leader. Can’t have team bonding without your ugly mug.” He knocks my shoulder, before taking a pull of his beer.

“Sterling, before the boys come back over, I want to tell you how sorry I am.” The mood becomes somber with the need to get it all out.

The week has been a whirlwind of commotion, between visiting Mitch yesterday, the force shrink clearing me for duty, and having my team welcome me back with open arms, I may as well get it all out and lay it on the line.

“Hetch, you don’t–” He shakes his head, not wanting to hear it.

“Yes, I do.” I cut him off before he can let me off the hook. “I’ve had my head up my ass for so long, and I took our friendship for granted. I know you have my back, and I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. But I want you to know I don’t want you to do it anymore. Okay?” I wait for him to respond, hoping he reads between the lines.

“You want me to kick your ass every time you’re an *,” he jokes, but I know he’s listening.

“I want you to do whatever it is you need to do, regardless of our friendship.” I don’t plan to find myself so f*cked-up again, not now when I’m learning how to deal with my issues. But if it ever came down to it, I don’t want Sterling risking his ass for me.

“Well, considering you’re not gonna find yourself there, we won’t have a problem.” He doesn’t give me the answer I want, but his slight nod tells me he understands.

“Thanks, man.” I knock my water to his beer again as Fox, Tate, and Hart join us back in the booth.

“You won’t f*cking believe who’s here.” Hart shakes his head, sliding in across from me.

“Who?” Sterling asks, but I don’t need to wait for them to tell me. I know who by the way all three of them are watching me.

Liberty.

Did the f*ckers set this up? What are the chances of meeting her out of town? Who is she here with?

The desperate knot in my stomach tightens. The questions swarming my mind only serve to second-guess my resolve.

“She here alone?” My jaw locks, waiting for the answer.

“She’s with a group of girls.”

Thank God.

“Have you spoken to her yet?” Fox inquires while I search her out.

Fuck, it’s the question of the week.

“I’m working on it,” I tell them, unsure exactly how I’m working on it. After hanging with Mitch yesterday for three hours, I was disappointed to find Liberty didn’t come back from the store. Knowing she wasn’t going to show up while I was there, I gave up waiting and told Mitch I’d be back in a couple of days.

“Well, you have the perfect chance now.” Tate nods toward the booth they’re sitting in, giving up their location.

Not giving one f*ck what the boys think of my lack of self-respect, I turn to get a better view and take her in. Chest expanding, pulse quickening.

Fuck me, I almost forgot how beautiful she is.

Her blonde hair is down tonight, just the way I like it. The mess of curls perfected in a tidy way. Red lips that have haunted my dreams are spread into a wide smile as she laughs at something Payton says.

Fuck, I’m the biggest f*cking dickhead to walk this earth.

She is mine.

All f*cking mine.