Here and Gone(28)

‘Lying in the rear passenger-side footwell,’ Mitchell said. ‘They were tucked underneath the passenger seat.’

‘How … how …?’

‘Audra, can you make this out?’ Mitchell put the tip of her pen to the image. ‘The jeans appear to be ripped, with blood on them. You can’t tell from the image, but they’re also damp with what seems to be urine. Is there anything you want to say about that?’

Audra studied the photograph, the jeans, the stitched tulips for pockets.

‘She was wearing them,’ she said.

‘Your daughter was wearing these jeans,’ Mitchell echoed. ‘When was she wearing them?’

‘When she took her.’

‘When who took her?’

‘Deputy Collins. When she took my children away, Louise was wearing those. But they weren’t torn. There was no blood on them.’

‘Then how did these jeans wind up back in your car? After it was towed away, how did they get there?’

Audra shook her head, tears free-flowing down her cheeks, dropping fat and heavy on the table. ‘I don’t know, but the sheriff and the deputy, they took my children, they know where they are. Please make them tell you.’

An idea sparked in her mind so bright and clear that she gasped. She put a hand to her mouth.

Mitchell leaned back. ‘What?’

‘The cameras,’ Audra said, feeling a giddy fizz behind her eyes. ‘The police cars, they all have cameras, right? Like you see on TV, when they do a traffic stop, they record it all, don’t they? Don’t they?’

Mitchell gave her a sad smile. ‘No, Audra, not in Elder County. Deputy Collins’ cruiser is almost fifteen years old, it’s never had a dashcam fitted, and the one in Sheriff Whiteside’s car stopped working three years ago. There’s never been spare change in the budget to fix it.’

‘What about GPS, anything like that?’

‘Nothing like that.’

The weight of it settled on Audra’s shoulders again – the fear, the anger, the impotence. She covered her eyes with her hands as Mitchell spoke.

‘Now, I’ve listened to what you’ve told me about Sheriff Whiteside and Deputy Collins, and believe me, I will speak with them about that. But right now, even if I discount the things we found in your car, it’s your word against theirs. And I’ve talked to some people today. Including at the diner you ate in early yesterday morning. The manager confirmed Sean and Louise were with you then. As far as I know, she’s the last person to have seen you and your kids together. She said you looked nervous.’

‘Of course I was nervous,’ Audra said through her hands. ‘I was trying to get away from my husband.’

‘I spoke with him too.’

Audra’s hands dropped away from her face. ‘No. Not him. Don’t listen to him. He’s a liar.’

‘You don’t know what he told me yet.’

‘He’s a goddamn liar.’ Audra’s voice rose again. ‘I don’t care what he said. He did this. He paid Whiteside and Collins to take my children from me.’

Mitchell sat quiet for a moment, let the silence dampen Audra’s anger.

‘I spoke with Patrick Kinney early this morning while I was waiting to board the flight from LAX to Phoenix. He told me about the problems you’ve had in the past. The alcohol. The cocaine.’

‘The cocaine was a long time ago, before the children, before Patrick even.’

‘Maybe so, but not the alcohol. Or the prescription meds. He told me you had three different doctors handing out uppers and downers like they were candy. He told me there was a time you barely knew your own children.’

Audra closed her eyes and whispered, ‘Goddamn him. He did this. I know he did.’

‘Mr Kinney told me since you left and took the kids, he’s been trying to get them back.’

‘There, see?’ Audra said, ignoring Mitchell’s irked expression. ‘He’s been trying to take them from me. He paid the sheriff—’

‘Let me finish, Audra. You’ve had New York Children’s Services circling, threatening to take the children back to their father. That’s why you upped and ran four days ago. Isn’t that right?’

‘I wasn’t going to let him take my—’

‘What happened, Audra?’ Mitchell leaned forward, her forearms on the table, her voice smooth and soft and low. ‘I have three kids myself, and an ex-husband. I’m lucky my mom’s around to help, but even so, they’re a handful. Raising children is hard. So hard. It’s stressful, you know? Even with all the love I have inside me, when they push hard, I can only bend so far. Every mother should get a medal, I think, just for getting through a day with children.’

She leaned closer still, her voice dropping in pitch, honey-sweet, her brown eyes fixed on Audra’s.

‘So tell me what happened. You’ve been driving for four days straight, you’re tired, you’re scared, the heat is getting to you. Maybe Sean and Louise are bickering in the backseat, you know the way children do. Maybe they keep asking for things they can’t have, even though you told them no a hundred times already. Maybe they’re shouting and screaming, over and over and over, louder and louder, and they just won’t stop. Did you do something, Audra? Did you pull over someplace out in the desert and go back there to them? Maybe you only meant to chew them out. Maybe a little smack on the leg or the arm. Maybe a shake, that’s all. I know that’s all you meant to do, I’ve wanted to do it to my own kids plenty of times, but you just lost control for a moment. Just for a split second, that’s all, and you did something. Is that what happened, Audra? I know it’s eating you. All you have to do is tell me, and we can go get them and this will all be over. Just tell me, Audra, what did you do?’