From Sanctum with Love (Masters and Mercenaries #10)(36)

You’ve splashed around in the kiddie pool. You’ve waded in to your ankles with your water wings on, little girl. If you scene with me you better know how to swim.

Those words from Kai had sent her right over the edge. They’d called to her inner alpha bitch, the one who submitted to none but the strongest, most worthy of Doms.

She had to bring this scene back to where it needed to be. Calm. Patient. A little boring.

“I suspect they’re here to see you,” Kori explained, giving Jared a smile. He was staring at her ass. Hottie McHollywood was standing there staring at her big old naked ass.

“We’re here to see the hardest bottom at Sanctum go up against the nastiest sadist,” a deep voice said.

She looked back at the crowd and recognized one of the Doms she’d played with before. Several of them were standing around along with Big Tag and his wife, Jake Dean, Case Taggart, and Alex and Eve McKay. Her friends had found their way here, too. Sarah, Vince, and Mia stood to the side with Jared’s friend, Squirrel.

“Hard bottom?” Kai asked.

Shit. She’d worked hard to keep that from him. She could take a lot of pain. Her threshold was legendary, but she didn’t do the types of scenes required to make her cry. She stayed in control. Hence the nickname Hard Bottom Girl.

“I can spank her for hours and she doesn’t even blink,” a Dom named Remy said. He was a bodyguard at McKay-Taggart and a very sweet man. He was easy to play with because he never got attached to any of the subs.

“I used a cane on her once and I stopped the scene because she was going to be too sore the next day,” Mistress Jackie said, her hand on Vince’s shoulder.

The Domme was also a fun partner. She never made it sexual in public, and Kori didn’t play in private so Mistress Jackie was a safe way to find the endorphin rush she got from scenes.

Or sometimes she and Sarah took turns playing with the equipment. That was when Big Tag shook his head and complained about the “free-range subs.”

Kai was suddenly beside her, dropping down on one knee. All that golden hair flowed around him, making him look like a gorgeous lion about to bare his teeth and take a chunk out of her. “Is this true? Because I was under the impression that you took things very lightly. I believe you’ve told me on several occasions that you never get serious in a scene.”

This was one of the many reasons she’d avoided him. Lying to him here meant something to her. It was one thing to omit a few truths but another to outright lie to a Dom. She had to be honest with him. “Those scenes weren’t serious to me.”

“What would your partners call them?”

“Kai, it’s not a big deal. I have a high tolerance for pain. That’s all. It takes more for me to find subspace.”

Maybe he would leave it at that.

“We’re going to have a long talk about this later. If I find out that you’ve had issues with not properly using your safe word…well, I suspect I’m about to find out myself. Don’t use that safe word unless you need it. I’ll know from your body language.”

“Are you threatening me? Are you telling me you’ll kick me out if I don’t behave the way you think I should?” Anger welled up and she was ready to get off the bench and walk the hell away from him.

Sanctum was her safe place. It was all she had some days. All she had except for him, and if he kicked her out, she wouldn’t have either. Kai couldn’t be the one who shoved her out and yet that was his job. He was the gatekeeper. He decided who belonged here and who wasn’t ready for it.

She wasn’t sure what she would do if Kai determined her unworthy. It would be worse than before. Worse than losing her script and her career. Worse than leaving California.

His hand found her back, gently holding her down. He leaned in and she could feel the warmth of his breath on her skin. “I would never kick you out. Never, Kori. I couldn’t do that to you. But I have to make sure you’re safe. I have to make sure you’re not doing this for the wrong reasons. Tell me you get pleasure out of this.”

She was getting pleasure simply from being close to him. If she turned her head the right way, their mouths might meet and she would know what it felt like to kiss him. “I get some peace out of it.”

“So no one knows how to take care of you? Do you let them?”

He was making her emotional. She hated that, but she couldn’t hold back. Not with him. “No. I’m just looking for a little subspace, Sir. That’s all I need.”

“I doubt that very much.” His hand eased over her. “Remember what I said about the safe word. I want you to use it if you need to. If I give you too much, pull me back. I can be intense. I think I’ll be quite intense with you.”

A shiver went through her. “I’ll be fine. You’ll understand that I’m not here to hurt myself.”

“And you’ll understand what it can be like when you get what you need.”

She had to take a deep breath because that had sounded like a promise to her. Or a challenge. All she knew was she couldn’t fake her way through this. Now that Kai had questions, he would seek answers, and if he wasn’t satisfied, she would find herself on someone’s damn therapist couch revealing all her secrets.

Or she could give him this one.

She forced herself to remain still though her heart thudded in her chest.