Dungeon Games (Masters and Mercenaries #6.5)(17)

A pounding headache was starting to sink in. “Which is why it’s a good thing I’m not dating her.”

“Or it could be a good thing because the type of woman you’re looking for doesn’t exist.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

She frowned, her lips a stubborn line. “It means I’m tired of watching you f*ck this up. You need to stop looking for this perfect sub of yours and let yourself fall in love with a real woman with real flaws who could potentially really adore the man you are. You deserve that, but you have it in your head that if you control every aspect of the relationship, nothing can go wrong. It’s a lie. You know damn well things can go wrong even when you love someone so much it hurts inside because at the end of the day, we’re all screwed up. Some of us more than others. I hate saying this, but you have to let me go.”

He frowned. She couldn’t possibly think that was the problem. “I am not pining over you.”

Cool blue eyes rolled. “I know that, babe. You’re raging at me. You’re still so angry with me you can’t see straight. We had something good and then we didn’t, and that’s my fault and your fault and time’s fault.” She took a deep breath. “Look, I know why you refused marriage counseling. It was over. It couldn’t be fixed, but there were things we should have talked about.”

“I don’t think we had anything to talk about, Maia.”

She ignored him and moved on. “You were gone for so long and then you came back a different person and while you were gone, I became a different person. I know Afghanistan changed you, but there were things that changed me, too, and I don’t regret any of it with the singular exception of how it hurt you. I have what I want. I know it’s weird to think that a job can really make a person happy, but it does for me. Crushing the people under me makes me so happy. Some of us are just born villains and some villains find themselves by accident. But you, you are one of the good guys, and I would hate to see you alone for the rest of your life because you can’t look past the one thing that didn’t work.”

But it had been so much more than one thing. More than his marriage. It wasn’t his marriage he saw in his nightmares. And he’d never reached out to her, not after he’d come home from the war. He’d f*cked her, told himself he loved her, but she was right. He had been a different man than the one she’d stood beside at the altar at the stupid age of eighteen.

What she didn’t understand was that he wasn’t looking for love anymore. He was looking for companionship and sex and a little peace. Love was a myth he’d left behind a long time ago.

“I’ll take it under advisement.” He would say anything to get rid of her.

“Sure you will. Well, you can’t say I didn’t try.” She stood up. “I’ll get back to punching puppies. Who am I kidding? Puppies are cute. That’s what interns are for. And seriously, I can get you a date with Subby Cathy.”

Her cell trilled and Derek sent a silent thank you to whoever was calling her. The minute she got back to work mode, she would forget about trying to fix his life.

Her face went bright red. “What do you mean they towed my Benz? Damn it. I am not behind on my payments. I own that f*cking car. I am going to ruin someone. You tell them to stop. I don’t care what you have to do. Throw your body in front of the truck. Offer the man a blow job. What do you mean he’s already gone?”

She was screaming into her cell as she stormed from the room.

Just as the door closed, he noticed Karina sitting at Keller’s desk. She looked up from the computer she absolutely shouldn’t be using and the sexiest, most evil grin split her face as Maia stomped by. Yeah, he shouldn’t have been worried. Karina didn’t need him to protect her from Maia. She could do that all on her own.

He was surrounded by crazy bitches. He didn’t even want to know what Karina had done to get Maia’s car towed.

The door closed and Derek was left in blissful silence. He knew he had to change his pants before he made his meeting with the captain, but he sat for a moment, letting the scent of Karina’s arousal relax him.

There was something oddly peaceful about it.





Chapter Four



Karina turned into her Deep Ellum apartment complex and cursed the day her building decided to go all egalitarian on the parking spaces. Karina had only heard the rumor that there had been assigned parking at one time, but it was a dream. She groaned as she drove past the aisle closest to her and then decided to give it up. She always ended up in the damn back.

She parked her Jeep and grabbed the groceries she’d bought. She hoped the lieutenant liked chicken and dumplings because she was in need of some comfort food.

He was coming over. To her apartment. Had she cleaned? She kept the place fairly neat, but sometimes when she was working a case things got a little disorganized. A lot disorganized. She glanced at her watch. Five thirty. Derek had texted her he was leaving work early. She had a whole thirty minutes before he got here. She needed to clean up, wipe down the countertops, maybe get rid of the boxes of old Chinese food that had been decorating the shelves of her fridge for way longer than they should have.

Maybe she should put on some lip gloss. She should definitely change. Or should she? She was just going to cook. She wouldn’t want to get sauce all over her clothes. Did she even own an apron? Definitely lip gloss and maybe some mascara.