Dear Life(91)

“You abandoned her.”

“No.” I take a deep breath and look Rebecca dead in the eyes. With a point of my finger, I say, “You abandoned her. I found her a loving and caring home.”

I don’t want to hear what else she has to say, I get in my car just as Rebecca calls out. “This isn’t over, Jace. I’m getting her back.”

Over my fucking dead and slowly breaking body.





CARTER


I’m shaking. Why the fuck am I shaking?

This isn’t my first go at it. I’ve done this hundreds of times, but for some reason, with Daisy below me, her naked, milky white, and beautiful body, I’m fucking nervous.

I didn’t expect to go caveman on her when I found out she was drinking without me, an activity I feel I get to stake claim on since she had her first drink with me.

I didn’t expect to maul her in the back alley, on my bike, soaking in her innocence in that stupid bike helmet.

I didn’t expect to want to own her so damn bad that I claimed her as my girlfriend.

I didn’t expect to drive home and love the feeling of her arms wrapped tightly around me, her giggle floating in and out of my ear.

I didn’t expect Daisy to hold my hand and guide me to my bed, a saunter in her step I’ve never seen before.

And fuck, I didn’t expect to have the purest beauty ever, spread beneath me, willing and waiting for me to explore her body.

But here I am, Daisy’s eyes are filled with lust, her hair is fanned across one of my pillow, and the moonlight dances through my un-curtained windows.

“Carter?”

“Hmm?” I ask, my fingers digging into her skin, my tongue racing around her nipple.

“Why am I naked and you’re fully clothed?”

“Because.” I bite down on her nipple, her chest rising from the nibble. “I told you I was going to make it up to you. That means I need you naked.”

“I’m feeling a little self-conscious.”

“No need to. You’re fucking gorgeous.”

“Not just about being naked.” Her voice wavers with nerves so I sit up, begrudgingly giving her nipple a rest.

“What’s going on?”

Looking away, she mumbles something I can’t quite hear.

“You’re going to have to speak up, Snowflake. Didn’t quite catch that.”

Still avoiding eye contact, this time her hands going over her eyes, she talks past her palms. “I was hoping to go all the way with you.” Even with her hands blocking her face, I can tell she’s embarrassed.

Her request knocks me back a few pegs. Go all the way with her. That’s a giant responsibility, and I’m not sure I’m the right man for it. I know the difference between us; I’m not blind in thinking she’s on the same playing field as me. She’s not. She’s on an entirely different level of potential.

I know there is someone better out there for her, someone who isn’t doomed to be a line cook the rest of his life. Someone who has a future, who doesn’t carry around a bottle of rage with him, who is one step up from living in the gutter.

But hell, I don’t want her to be with anyone else. And I sure as shit don’t want anyone else touching her, being the one to take her virginity. The notion of that happening gives me blind rage. I wasn’t fucking around when I said she was my girlfriend.

“You have to say something. I’m dying inside right now.”

Those eyes, those lips, that heart. Fuck, I have to have it all.

Own you. I’m going to do that. I’m a selfish prick wanting to fulfill my own agenda. I own up to that, and I’m taking what I want. Daisy. I want all of her.

Sitting up, I keep my eyes fixed on her as I reach behind me and grab my shirt, pulling it over my head and tossing it to the side. Daisy’s reaction is priceless as she takes me in, from my multiple tattoos that mean nothing more than the trials and tribulations I’ve gone through, to my well-defined chest that I work hard to obtain, especially given my profession of having to taste food constantly.

“That better?”

She swallows hard, her throat constricting and releasing. “Uh, you still have your jeans on.”

I settle between her legs. “Yeah, we’ll get to that, but first, I need to taste you.” I lower my head only for her legs to clamp my head in a viselike lock. With my index finger I tap her on the stomach, as if I’m knocking for entrance. “You’ve got to unclench there, sweet cheeks.”

“I’m nervous,” she responds, her voice shaky, knocking me back on my knees.

Fuck, this is going to be hard. I want to devour her but I need to also take my time. Her body deserves to be worshipped.

“No need to be nervous, Snowflake. It’s me. I’m not going to hurt you.”

She nods, tears welling in her eyes.

“Hey.” Lining up our bodies, I move so I’m hovering just above her, my face next to hers. “Don’t cry. We don’t have to do this. I’m happy with just making out with you. Maybe a little boob grab.” I smirk, trying to lighten the mood.

“I want to do this. I’m just nervous.”

“That’s normal. I really don’t mind waiting, Daisy. I don’t want you to think we have to do this. Like I said, your lips on mine make me one happy man.”