Crave Me (The Good Ol' Boys #4)(84)

She tore open the package. Her eyes widening once she pulled out the blanket.

“Oh my God,” she whispered, her eyes immediately filling with tears.

She took in every last square of the memory blanket that I’d had specially made for her. There was a picture of her mom, her dad, and her as a baby. A few family shots scattered around. There was a photo of us that was taken in Oak Island and daisies to fill in the spaces between. The rest were my sketches, her favorite pictures that I drew. She ran her fingers over all the pictures, tears falling down on them.

“It’s for when I work late and you’re alone. I know you hate it. I know you worry, even though you have nothing to be scared about. But now, you can wait for me wrapped up in this blanket and feel safe and secure until I come home to you.”

She peered up at me with her big, bright, blue eyes, tears falling down her beautiful face.

“How did you do this?”

“Believe it or not… Your uncle.”





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I jerked back, stunned. “What? My uncle helped you?”

“I told him that I wanted to give you a piece of your childhood for your birthday. He gave me an address and a key. He said everything I needed would be in there. It was a storage unit that didn’t have much, just some boxes. There were photo albums, clothes, and some jewelry. He told me to keep the key. In case you wanted—”

“My uncle? He’s kept all this. Why didn’t he ever tell—” I shook my head, wiping away my tears.

I gave up trying to understand Uncle Alejandro years ago. I took in every last picture, especially the one of my mom and dad. They were kissing. They looked so happy, so in love. I couldn’t believe Austin did this. It was the most thoughtful thing anyone could have given me.

A piece of my happiness before the darkness set in.

“You look like her. But you have your dad’s blue eyes,” he chimed in, pointing to my dad in the picture.

I smiled, more tears spilled over. “My dad used to travel a lot. My mom would let me sleep with her in their bed when he was gone. She’d tell me that she didn’t miss him as much when I was lying next to her. That all she had to do was look into my eyes and she would see my dad’s staring back at her.”

Austin grabbed my chin, making me look at him. Wiping away my tears with his thumb. The smell of cigarettes along with his touch comforting me the way it always did.

“I didn’t have this made to make you cry, baby.”

“They’re happy tears,” I reassured him.

“Anytime you want to talk about your parents. I’m here to listen. I wish I could have met them, so I could tell them how amazing their daughter is and how much I’m in love with her.”

“I love you too. Thank—”

“Austin!” Mitch called out, peeking his head through the door, interrupting our special moment.

I had forgotten that they were here. Which was surprising since they were here more often than not. I didn’t get f*cked up with Austin nearly as much as I used to. I thought if I stopped partying, if I led by example, then he would follow in my footsteps.

I was wrong.

He just got new friends to party and get f*cked up with.

“Your phone is ringing off the damn hook in here. Either answer it or turn it the f*ck off,” he said, holding Austin’s ringing phone out in front of him.

Austin glanced over at me silently asking my consent, and I nodded. He walked away from me to grab the phone. I stayed by the railing, admiring my blanket.

He was so f*cking sweet when he wanted to be.

“Yeah,” he answered, his tone and demeanor quickly changing. “No shit, motherf*cker, it was supposed to be here last week. You either make it happen or I’ll find someone who will!” he snapped, making me jump.

I stopped going on runs with him a long time ago. He didn’t need me with him anymore. I was just another thing for him to worry about during deals. I hated the person he would turn into. He wasn’t my Austin when he was working. He was a complete stranger. The power, the money, and the drugs took over. It didn’t happen over night. But as weeks turned into months, and months turned into years, the more I started to see him become someone I didn’t recognize anymore.

Someone that scared me.

Someone that reminded me of my uncle.

I just stopped going, and he never asked why. I think a part of him knew. It was easier for him to be that person if I wasn’t around. To let the darkness take over. He loved the power and the respect. The money was just an added bonus because what he really loved.

Were the drugs.

It was no longer about the pain in his back. For years I justified him popping pain pills like they were f*cking candy. That he was actually in agony from the muscle spasms, to have to take the Percocets, the Vicodins, the Oxys that I supplied him with. Anything I could get my hands on to help him get through the day. That wasn’t the case anymore.

There were days that I couldn’t tell if he was high or sober. Sometimes it all blended together, and that terrified me. I lay awake waiting for him, not caring if he came home high, just as long as he came home to me.

Wrapped his arms around me.

Told me he loved me.

That I was his girl.

That I was his everything.

Promising me a future that I desperately wanted to believe in, but as the years went on, the more it became a dream than a reality. At times I felt like an outsider looking into the life I caused. The life that I brought him into, the life that he had because of me.