Confessions of a Bad Boy(17)

5





Nate




They say it’s the things you don’t do that you end up regretting. Now think about all the things you never do because you settled down, or God forbid, got married. All the places you never went, the people you never met, the dreams you never fulfilled… For what? So that you can be sure that when you go home, somebody’s waiting there for you? So that you don’t have to worry about dying alone?

I know what you’re all going to say. Don’t bother sending me the same comments. ‘It’s love, it’s companionship, it’s loyalty, you just don’t get it, Bad Boy.’ Right. So how’s that working out for you all, then? Have you seen the divorce rates lately? The truth is that I do get it. The alternative to settling down is actually living your life – and that’s f*cking scary for a lot of people. That’s why most of you are watching this channel in the first place. It ain’t easy living like me, sleeping with beautiful women every night of the week, taking things one second at a time, searching for that one beautiful connection, then throwing it away the morning after – but I’ll tell you this: It’s pretty f*cking awesome.

But everyone’s different, right? Every situation specific. Some of the emails you guys send me are so hopeless, like you’ve given up. Well, that’s why I’m going to answer some of them right now, during my weekly advice vlog…



As the elevator doors open I check my watch – only half an hour late. Big improvement. At this rate I might even ask for a raise soon. I step beside Chloe’s desk and lean against it, picking up a magazine she laid aside.

“You seem like you’re in a good mood this morning,” Chloe smirks. “Who was she?”

“‘She’ was a glass of Scottish malt and a good night’s sleep.” It’s not technically a lie, but it leaves out the adrenaline rush I always get after uploading the latest Bad Boy vlog.

Chloe eyes me over her thick-rimmed glasses.

“Right,” she says, returning her gaze to her computer screen. “And I didn’t binge-watch trashy reality TV shows until three in the morning.”

“You should have told me, we could have shared the bottle.”

Chloe shakes her head, but she smiles as she does so.

“And then one of us would have to look for another job. No thanks.”

“Do you really think all I do is sleep with women every night?”

Chloe pulls her glasses down a little and looks at me.

“No. Not always at night. Sometimes you sneak them in here during your lunchbreak.”

My smile drops like a stone.

“Don’t worry, Nate. Your secret’s safe with me. But you should be more careful. I think the cleaning lady is up to three lost earrings, a half-dozen fake nails, and a lace thong.”

I sigh and look over towards the office.

“I really should do something about these women leaving their underwear behind.”

“Anyway,” Chloe says, pushing her glasses back up her nose and checking her pad, “Will left a message. He wants to speak to you. Good news, it sounded like.”

“Great. Can you tell him to meet me at Blake’s, the bar near his place?”

“Can do. Oh, and the boss wants to see you in his office.”

I wince.

“Now?”

“He said as soon as you got in. So…”

I drop the magazine back onto Chloe’s desk and make my way towards Robinson’s office, quickly reminding myself of all the excuses I’ve used recently – meetings with the boss usually end with me trying to back out of something. After knocking lightly, his always-enthusiastic voice beckons me in.

“Come in! Nate! Good to see you!”

“Morning.”

If my office is impressive for its corner windows, Robinson’s is impressive because of its gigantic size. The walk from the entrance to his desk alone is bigger than any other office on the floor, and the second you step inside you can easily convince yourself you’re actually in some East Coast billionaire’s country house.

Robinson gets up from behind his desk and meets me halfway, shaking my hand with typical thoroughness, like a mechanic wrenching a tough bolt.

“I hope you’re ready for this weekend?”

I look at him through bemused eyes.

“This weekend?”

“The Napa retreat, remember? I told you about it last week. The time has come.”

“Ah,” I say, smiling with recognition. “Yes. I remember. About that…I don’t think—”

“No!” he roars suddenly. “Not this time, Nate! I understand that you’re a very busy man, with an incredibly vibrant personal life, which is why I’ve overlooked your absence from many out-of-office activities,” he says, turning back to walk towards his desk, “but this is different. Not only are the very best clients that this agency has ever worked with going to attend, but the partners, the New York office, and some very influential people will be there too.” He reaches his office chair, turns around, and eases himself back into it. “This is the inner circle, Nate. Only the most powerful players get invited to this sort of thing, and some of the most important decisions are made there. So you and Tessa are going, and that’s final.”