Betray the Bear (Bear Valley Shifters #4)(34)

“Anya,” Brody warned.

“No, Brody. You and Chase can’t keep it from her forever. She’s strong.” Joanna looked at her with pleading, uncertain eyes. “You’re strong, right Anya?”

Anya’s fear and reserve slipped away. She’d faced down Nathan, and her bear had come through and fought for her. She was stronger than she had even realized. Standing, she wobbled and steadied herself on Joanna’s outstretched hand. Her legs felt like she hadn’t used them before and she had to step carefully as she made her way to the bathroom. “I want to do this alone,” she said, and closed the door softly behind her. The click of the lock was so loud in the small space.

Inhaling deeply, she turned and lifted her chin, staring at what Nathan had done to her in the mirror. She’d been stitched, but her shifter healing had kicked in and someone had removed them already. The long claw mark on her neck stretched up her jaw and tapered off across one cheek. It was gruesome and she looked away with a gasp. Her shoulders hunched, as if a hundred pounds of dead weight had been thrown across them.

She was hideous, and now she’d think of Nathan and that awful night every time she looked in the mirror. Chase would think of her betrayal when he looked at her…

Her lip trembled and she bit it hard to stop the weakness. Determined, she glared at herself in the mirror and clenched her hands against her thighs until she memorized her new reflection. It took a long time. Then she lifted her chin and dashed a drop of moisture away with the back of her hand, and swore she would find a way to make things right again.

Her suitcase sat against the wall near the shower, so she turned on the hot tap and peeled off her clothes. She couldn’t call a meeting with Riker looking like she’d just been in a coma for a week, so she took her time scrubbing herself clean, careful to keep the water away from her injury.

Cleanliness did wonders for how she felt and she dressed in dark jeans and a plum colored blouse, the nicest shirt she’d brought. She brushed her hair and dried it, and even took the time to curl it. For the first time since she’d come to Bear Valley, she pulled out the small make-up purse she’d brought and gave herself smoky eyes and thick, dark lashes, and petal pink gloss on her lips.

Ignoring the tug of injured skin, she left the bathroom with her luggage clacking against the tile floor behind her. “I’m hungry. And I’m ready to go see Riker now,” she told Joanna and Brody. Chase was still gone and a piece of her broke that he hated her. She should’ve told him what Nathan was making her do. “First, I need to talk to Chase. Do you know where he is?”

Brody handed her a keycard and muttered, “Probably in our room. Room 112.” He still couldn’t seem to force himself to look at her, and something about his discomfort made her angry.

“Look at it, Brody.”

He dragged his eyes to her cheek and stared impassively.

“Might as well get used to it. I don’t want to have every conversation with you staring at my feet.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, swallowing hard. “It just looks like it hurts so badly and I hate that this happened to you. I should’ve killed Nathan when I had the chance. I could’ve chased him down when we came to save Hannah, and now my mercy got you mauled.”

“But then I never would’ve been sent to Bear Valley, and I never would’ve known any different than where I was. I never would’ve met Chase. So thank you for not killing him then. And Joanna, I owe you my life for defending me the night this happened. How did you know to be there?”

“I knew Nathan wouldn’t give up one of his mates to Bear Valley. He’d kill you before he did that. I sat in the woods near Chase’s house every night last week, waiting for you to make your move. I knew you’d meet Nathan. I just didn’t know when or where.”

“Do you hate me?”

“No.” A slow smile stretched across Joanna’s face. “I heard what you said to him, and I watched you fight, Anya. I don’t hate you. I’m proud of you.”

Anya hugged her, hard. Clenching Joanna’s shirt in her hands, she searched the ceiling tiles and sent a silent thank you into the universe that she and Joanna’s trails had crossed again. She pulled away and left the room without looking back. She would cry if she did, and she wanted to approach Chase when she looked strong.

The hotel was a small, one story establishment with cracked walls and chipped paint on the doors. She debated knocking but decided against it and pressed the key into room 112.

Chase sat on the bed much like she’d seen him when he had been in pain back in his own room in Bear Valley. Face in his hands, his shoulders were hunched so deeply, she could make out each indentation of muscle through his thin shirt. When he turned, his eyes looked tortured and she fell to her knees, exposing her neck as much as her torn skin would allow.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I know you hate me, and you have every right. I know I hurt you. I didn’t want to lie and I should’ve told you what I was being made to do, but I thought if I just handled it on my own, I could keep you.”

He knelt in front of her. “I thought I lost you.” His voice was ragged and tormented as he searched her face.

“You aren’t mad at me?”

He scrubbed his hands through his hair and pulled her into his lap, tucked her under his chin. “You were unconscious through my mad phase. That lasted until Joanna told me about all the ways Nathan manipulated you. She told me what you said to him and how you fought him when he tried to mark you.” His voice faltered. “You fought the mark for me, didn’t you?”