Arrow's Hell (Wind Dragons MC #2)(39)

I felt like utter shit.

“Why the hell would you just walk out when we told you that it wasn’t safe?” Rake asks, pacing up and down. “I think I lost ten years of my life! Christ, Anna! If something had happened to you . . .”

“I was fine,” I say for what feels like the tenth time. “I wasn’t hurt. I know I screwed up and I’m sorry, okay?”

I’d been so busy feeling hurt over Arrow that I acted without thought. I knew it was all on me. But right now I just want to go to bed. I need a good cry, but I don’t want anyone to witness it.

I look up to find Arrow staring at me, a lost look on his face.

“Who hit you?” I ask quietly, my voice subdued.

He looks at Rake, and my eyes widen.

“You hit him?” I ask Rake.

Fuck, I caused this. I didn’t think it was possible to feel worse, but I just proved myself wrong.

“He should have kept a better eye on you,” Rake says, rubbing his hands through his hair. “I need a f*ckin’ drink, some weed, and a warm, willing woman.”

With that, he storms out. Looks like he’s not holding back from me anymore, that’s for damn sure.

“You were lucky this time, Anna,” Tracker says to me, softly, yet his gaze is full of disapproval. “You should have listened to us. I hope you learned your lesson this time and don’t try to do something so foolish again.”

Sin gives me a look that would frighten a lesser woman. “I’m so f*ckin’ glad you’re not my sister.”

Well, ouch. That hurt. After seeing Rake’s face I think that Sin’s speaking the truth. My brother didn’t deserve to have to worry about me after I put myself in danger. Sin leaves after that, and I for one am grateful for his absence. My shoulders droop. Only one man left in the room.

I turn to him, giving him my full attention.

“I’m sorry Rake hit you because of me,” I tell Arrow, our eyes connected. “I don’t want to cause trouble between you guys, and trust me, I’ve learned my lesson.”

“Anna—”

I flash back to seeing him with Jill, and the hurt returns in full force. I might feel connected to Arrow, but nothing can come of it. After how I acted today I doubt he even wants me like that anymore. Jill is definitely an easier option for him.

“I guess we’re even now,” I say, forcing my lips to move.

I needed to sever the tie between the two of us.

Standing up, I move to leave the room when he finally speaks.

“How so?”

I shrug. “You hurt me and I got you hurt in return. We’re even in my book.”

“Anna—”

I ignore him and leave.

Then I’m finally alone, and I let the tears pour.

*

After crying until I had no tears left, and explaining and apologizing to Lana, I take a bath, taking my time soaking in the water. It turns out Lana came to pick me up and when I wasn’t there, she rang Tracker. How she had his number is something I plan on asking her the next time I see her. Tracker had called Arrow, and everyone panicked, knowing what they think they know about the Wild Men’s history and violence toward women. The men had worked quickly, wanting me back and worrying when Talon said he was keeping me overnight. All in all, I was exhausted. Being kidnapped and held hostage was damn exhausting, and I’d rather not do it ever again. I understand I was lucky, in the sense I wasn’t hurt or raped or tortured, but still, I’d been scared.

I’d wanted to go back to my apartment tonight but I was told no, to stay at least another two nights, and for once, I listened without complaint. I didn’t need to start any more trouble—that was for sure. When the bubbles disappear and my wine finished, I drag myself out of the bath and walk into my room wrapped in nothing but a towel. I come to a standstill at the sight of Arrow sitting on my bed, his head in his hands. This whole thing must have brought back memories of Mary, of her being hurt and his not being there to do anything about it. I feel for him, I do, but right now I’m kind of stuck on my own issues. I need to be selfish.

“Arrow—”

“Why did you leave, Anna?” he asks, lifting his head and watching me.

“I was angry,” I say. “I didn’t think I was in any actual danger; I mean, what were the chances? I was stupid, arrogant, and na?ve.”

And I wish I could take it back.

“Why?” he demands, brown eyes flashing. “Why were you angry?”

Why was I angry? Was he seriously asking me that?

“Surely you aren’t that stupid, Arrow? You went from my bed to f*cking Jill, from kissing me to being inside her. You may not have any feelings for me, but that doesn’t mean that I don’t. I’m sick of you playing with me, so please, just leave and let me get some rest.”

I’m not at my best, my shields are down, my resilience tested, my will temporarily shattered.

I want to wake up to a new day and start fresh. I need time to regain my strength.

“So that’s why you left? Endangering yourself to, what, get back at me?” he asks, steel in his tone.

“No—”

“Well, it worked. I was f*cking worried about you; if anything happened to you . . . For f*ck’s sake, Anna, if you’re pissed you come to me and let me know. If we’re in private, say whatever you have to say, but you bring it to me. What you don’t do is walk off when we’re on a f*ckin’ lockdown, scaring half the men to death. We protect what’s ours, Anna, and whether you like it or not, you are ours.”