And the Trees Crept In(68)

“I died,” I whisper. “I’m… dead. I’ve been dead… this whole time?”

“Yes.”

I look up at him. “Are you even my Gowan?”

“Yes.”

“Are you… dead, too?”

He takes my hand. “Yes.”

“And you’ve known I’m dead since the moment you came out of the woods…?”

“Yes.”

I take a moment to process this information, but something is niggling at me, is wrong.

And then I see it.

“No.”

All this… all this is happening inside the Creeper Man’s lair—his cave. It’s a trick! Oh, God. I nearly fell for it. He’s trying to distract me from finding Nori. This is an illusion, a trap!

I push Gowan away from me, and I’m back in the forest. Before he can stop me, I run. I need to find his cave again. I need to find it and go in strong. I will find him and face him and I will kill him and save my sister.





I run for a long time chased by Creaking

and

The growl of my stomach

and

The retching of Nori throwing up

and

A symphony of suffering.

And then he’s there. The Creeper Man.

He is tall.

He is thin.

A dark outfit.

Like tree bark.

He has no hair.

No eyes.

No nose.

Only one

wide

mouth.

Which smiles.

Nori is crying for me somewhere. Gowan is watching from a distance away. I fill up with rage and hate, and I rush at the Creeper Man with a branch in my hand. I strike him, but he grins. I hit again and again and again, over and over, feeling my body weakening with every blow. I am so tired. I haven’t eaten anything in so long. He’s too strong for me. Always grinning with that wide mouth.

“Forgive yourself!” Gowan calls.

All around, vines and bushes curl out of the floorboards, berries, thick and black, pregnant with juice, growing up and up.

No. I won’t give up. I will not eat.

I fight and I strike until finally there is nothing left. No strength. No energy. No will.

I collapse onto the forest floorboards, and I drop the branch.

There is a

S

I N

K

I N

G

sensation, like falling, a fading noise distorting lower as it winds down—a slowing of the clock as darkness takes over—and I give in to it. It would be… so nice… to just… give in.

The last thing I hear is Gowan’s cry.

“SILLA, NO!”





31


story



Pick a petal, he loves me

another, he loves me not,

kiss and tell that lady

all that was forgot.



I don’t want to do this, but I have to. I’ve been planning it for months. Waiting for the perfect time. And that’s now.

I rouse Nori. Quiet as a mouse.

Squeak!

I find the escape bag, and carry her through to the living room. He’s drunk, asleep. She’s got an arm slung over him. For warmth? Protection? To make sure he stays down?

His beer cans are scattered all over the floor, and his snores—

Wait.

What’s happening?

This feels… familiar.

I glance behind me. “Gowan…?”

At first, nothing.

Then he steps through the shadows at the far side of the wall. He stares at me, his eyes full of tears, and smiles wider than I’ve ever seen.

“You remember,” he chokes, grinning.

My eyes open, as though they had been closed, and I am lying on the forest-manor floor. And Nori is not.

“What just happened?”

Gowan helps me to my feet, and then folds me into his arms. His breath is hot on my neck.

“You almost reset,” he murmurs, holding me tighter.

I pull away gently. “Reset?”

Everything feels so surreal. As eerily still as this horrible place has always been, only now there is no atmosphere. I get to my feet and look around. And he’s there. The Creeper Man. Standing still as a statue, towering above me. I stumble back, but he doesn’t move. Gowan’s words: Forgive yourself. Cathy and Nori’s words: He’s already here.

I just stare at him.

All around me, the berries hang, oversized and plump and dark with juice. I want them. I don’t. Every berry is matched and surrounded by at least three sharp thorns.

“I almost… reset.”

I don’t know why I do it.

Something inside me just melts like ice into water. I am tired of fighting. Tired of the sadness. Tired of the hunger. Tired of missing someone I didn’t even know was gone. I have carried this load long enough. And I know what I am looking at. I finally know what I am looking at.

I reach through the thorns, flinching as they prick and tear at my arms, and I grab a handful of berries. The thorns let me go, curling away, setting me free. I step forward, up to the Creeper Man, and I offer him the berries. He raises one long hand and turns it palm upward. I let the berries drop.

I am crying.

I touch my face to make sure it’s real. Water on my face, water in my heart, melting away the stone.