Always Have: A Bad Boy Romance(49)

The stab of jealousy turns into a swarm of guilt. I never should have lied to her.

“So, what about you?” she asks. “You haven’t said a word about a girl in months. Who are you sleeping with these days?”

“God, Selene, why would you even ask me that? I don’t want to know if you’re sleeping with someone.”

She shrugs. “I don’t know. You seem like you’re busy all the time. I figure there must be a girl involved.”

How should I play this? I don’t want to play it at all anymore. I’m sick of hiding my relationship with Kylie. It was a stupid thing to do in the first place, and I want it to be over. But I have to tread carefully. I promised myself a long time ago that I wouldn’t hurt my sister. Losing Mom and Dad almost killed her, and I couldn’t live with myself if I caused her pain.

Of course, I’ve been lying to her about Kylie for months. Isn’t that going to cause her pain?

No, it’s going to make her mad, and I can deal with mad Selene.

“Yeah, there might be someone,” I say.

“Do you want to tell me about her?” she asks.

There’s something weird in her voice. First of all, since when does she care who I’m seeing, especially if I’m just having a fling on the side with someone I don’t intend to bring around? It wouldn’t be the first time, not by a long shot. Second, she sounds too suspicious. Like she knows what’s going on and she’s trying to get me to admit it.

Fuck.



“Why do you want to know?” I ask, shooting her an annoyed look.

She shrugs again. “Just wondering.”

She picks up her sandwich, but she stares straight ahead into the kitchen. I can tell she’s thinking about something. After a lengthy silence, she puts down her food.

“I see the way you look at her,” she says, her voice unusually soft.

My chest clenches. “Look at who?”

“Kylie.”

I try to laugh it off, like she must be joking. “What does that mean?”

“You can’t look at her like that, Brax,” she says.

She’s not joking. Shit. I get up and go to the fridge so she won’t see my face. “I don’t look at her like anything.”

“Yes, you do.”

She’s right. No matter how hard I try to hide my feelings when the three of us are together—which isn’t very often these days, and I realize how f*cked up that is—I know it still shows.

I decide to feel this out. “So what if I do?”

“No, Braxton,” she says.

I look at her over my shoulder. Her face is severe.

“What do you mean, no?”

“You heard me,” she says. “You cannot look at Kylie like that. Not ever. Do you understand me?”

Shit. My heart starts to beat too fast and adrenaline runs through my veins. What the f*ck do I say now? “What are you worried about?”

“I’m worried about you. And her,” she says. “And you being you. Kylie is not on the menu, Brax. You have to keep her in the friend zone.”

Too late for that. “Where is this even coming from?”

“The three of us are fragile,” she says. “We’ve known her so long, it seems like we’ll all be friends forever. It’s hard to imagine it any other way. But a guy-girl friendship is always breakable, especially when the guy is you. So whatever thing you’re doing in your head where you think you can make something work out with her, you need to stop. Now. Right this second. Because if you hook up with Kylie, it will absolutely f*cking kill me.”

It’s like my lungs are caught in a vice. I’m panicking; I can’t breathe. My head is spinning, but I keep my expression still so it won’t show. Hide behind my walls. I’m pretty good at maintaining a tough exterior, especially in front of Selene. I’ve always had to. But this has me crumbling inside, reality crashing down on me like shards of broken glass.

No. There has to be another way.

“Kill you? That’s a little dramatic, don’t you think?”

Her eyes are huge, and her stress and fear pours into me, like it’s my own. I can feel it, hard edged and biting. The twin thing again.

“No, it’s not dramatic,” she says. “Don’t do it. I could not handle it if you hooked up with her. Do you understand me? You can’t. Promise me.”

“What?”

“Promise me you won’t hook up with Kylie.”

I stare at her, the rawness of her emotions pouring over me. She’s totally and completely serious.

No, Selene. Please don’t make me do this. Please don’t make me give her up.

“Come on, Brax,” she says.

She needs this from me, as much as she’s ever needed anything. And I always give my sister what she needs. I run a hand through my hair to give myself a second before I have to speak, then croak out a reply: “Sure, Selene. Whatever. It’s not like that. Kylie’s my best friend.”

“Promise,” she says.

I swallow hard. “I promise.”

Her shoulders relax and her expression softens. “Okay, good.”

I need to get out of here. Now. “I have clients this afternoon. I have to head out.”

“Okay, so movie night this weekend?” she asks.