A Fallow Heart (Tommy Creek #2)(43)

Instead of sending her a guilty nod, he burst out laughing. She caught her breath, drawn by the honest, open sound. Everything about this huge, beautiful man was so honest and open; polite and courteous. He was simply too good to be true.

“No,” he managed to say through his chuckles. “You didn’t do that.”

Her shoulders slumped, a little bit with relief and strangely enough, a little bit with disappointment. She felt like an oven top, the burner constantly changing from bright orange to no color while her body only grew hotter, because her face which had been chilly a second before, and hot a second before that, returned to scalding.

Curious, she had to ask, “So…um, what exactly didn’t you stop me from doing?”

“A kiss,” he admitted nearly on a whisper. His pale brown, whiskey eyes lifted. “Then another kiss.”

She cleared her throat, trying to remain professional, unaffected. With a nod, she hoarsely admitted, “I remember some kissing.”

“Do you remember when I braced your back against the wall of your house right by the back door?” he asked. He seemed closer all of a sudden. She would’ve sworn he hadn’t moved, and she knew she hadn’t moved, but the space between them looked entirely nonexistent, when there’d been plenty of room a second ago. “And how I kissed you some more, our bodies pressed tight, our hands all over each other, our mouths open and seeking?”

“No,” she croaked, gulping as her throat contracted, unable to help but envision the scene he drew as if she could almost recall it exactly as he described. “I don’t remember that.”

He confirmed it with a bob of his head. “Then I, uh, I lifted my knee…up between your legs.”

Heat suffused her…between her legs. She could dang near feel him there now, his warm, thick leg wedged tight against her as she— “You rode my thigh until…”

When his words drifted off, her eyes grew large. “Until?”

His eyes dilated as he stared at her, his pupils so large they nearly swallowed the whiskey color whole as he confessed, “Until you came.”

His quiet simple words made her body spark, a phantom bolt of pleasure igniting inside her.

Her lips parted. “I…I…?”

He nodded. “Yeah.”

“Oh,” she barely breathed out the word.

“So you see.” He paused to clear his throat and glance out the front windshield at her parked car. “I’m the one who owes you the apology. I took advantage of you in the most intimate way possible. Then I went and upset you when you were pregnant, caused you to have a miscarriage, and—”

She didn’t know how else to hush him, so she lifted her hand and set it over his mouth.

Instantly, he stopped talking. Warm, moist breath rushed across the tips of her fingers.

“Is that what you think?” she asked, incredulous. “That you caused my miscarriage? Cooper, you were the only person trying to help me. You didn’t leave me stranded when you found out I was pregnant. You didn’t threaten to put my baby up for adoption.” He opened his mouth under her hand so she swiftly inserted, “You did not cause my miscarriage. And you certainly didn’t take advantage of me. No other boy in your boots would’ve stopped when you did.”

“I nearly didn’t stop.” He closed his eyes, his face ravaged by obvious guilt.

The vibration of those words against her skin sent another shock of awareness up her arm. She shivered and shook her head, unable to believe how much heat pooled in her belly, or how much shame swirled in his gaze.

He’d honestly felt guilty all these years, thinking he’d wronged her. She wanted to put her arms around him and hug him. She instinctively knew little, petite her could comfort this enormous, muscled man with his wide shoulders hunched in humiliation. She could take all his misery away…if only she had the nerve.

Chickening out, she licked her lips and dropped her hand from his mouth. “You did nothing wrong. I’m the one who’s sorry.”

He glanced at her with an amused smile. “You already said that. And I still don’t know what you have to be so sorry about.”

She bubbled out an incredulous laugh. “My God, you stood up to the most powerful man in Tommy Creek and tried to convince him you’d impregnated his eighteen-year-old daughter. I still can’t decide if you’re the bravest person I ever met or the craziest. But you did it, just because you knew I wanted your help.” She wiped a sudden dampness off her cheeks. “And I knew you’d help me if I asked. I took advantage of your kindness. I used you, and I’m horrified by my actions.”

He shook his head, frowning. “No, it was my decision, Jo Ellen. You didn’t trick, or force, or pressure, or cajole me in any way. And technically, you never even asked. I straight up volunteered.”

“But you’re naturally so giving and helpful. And I was selfish. Deep inside, I knew you would sacrifice everything to help me. Because that’s just who you are.”

He stared at her a solid ten seconds before he shook his head. “You’re wrong. If I saw a car stuck in the ditch, yeah, I’d pull over to give them a hand. But this was my entire future on the line. I was prepared to become a father, possibly a husband…” He paused to glance meaningfully at her, making her stomach grow tight and warm. “I wouldn’t have done that for just any stranger on the side of the road. Hell, I wouldn’t have done it for Emma Leigh if it had been her instead of you.”