Dawn of Ash (Imdalind, #6)(30)

There was something about her—about Risha—that had been troubling for me. Considering the way she always appeared with food when I was training Jaromir, despite having all of the responsibilities to tend to as Ilyan’s second, she had still managed to seek me out. I would venture a guess that I wasn’t the only one fighting off an overly strong attachment.

That and the way she looked at me pretty much sealed it for me.

“What is it, Ryland? Don’t you like food?” She could barely get the words out with how much she was laughing. Her eyes danced as the loose curls of her strawberry-blonde hair bobbed and swayed over her back.

“Something like that.” I tried my hand at subtly again, this time keeping my voice low, something that was made easier by the deep Czech we spoke.

My stomach flipped as her cheeks tinged with red, her eyes piercing mine while she took a step closer, her head held high as she offered one of the disgusting sandwiches to me.

“Or was it this supposed marathon you were running?”

My mind went blank. “What marathon?”

“When I came in … You were talking about a marathon.” She smiled, pushing a lock of hair behind her ear as she looked at me.

“Oh.” I could barely think.

It took me a full minute to catch on. Apparently, she had drained my mind of thought more than I had assumed.

“It wasn’t a real marathon.”

“I didn’t think so.” Her eyes glittered even more, staring at me with some message I couldn’t quite decipher before she looked away, toward Jaromir who was still shooting smoke away from himself, still trying to accomplish that darned wrist flick.

I groaned and pinched the bridge of my nose, fully aware it was also something I had picked up from Ilyan yet not really caring at the moment.

“Jaromir is the marathon, I take it.” She took another step toward me, her sudden change in proximity making it very hard to concentrate.

Come on, Ryland, what’s wrong with you?

“I think I realized how much more he sees me as a father figure and less like a…” I struggled to find a word.

I could feel the heat of her skin radiate against me, making it very hard to focus.

“Friend,” she supplied.

Close enough.

I nodded.

“Well, to be fair, Ry, I don’t think he’s supposed to be your friend or you his.”

I turned toward her quickly, my eyes narrowing in question, but all she did was smile and move to sit on the old, bloodstained cobbles, her hand waving beside her in welcoming.

I sat beside her without question, my heart continuing to hammer uncomfortably in my chest.

“You can’t really be his friend and teach him everything he needs to know—to fight, to win … You have to train him, not play with him.”

She was saying things I already knew, things I should have been more careful about from the beginning. However, it was so much more complex than that, and I felt more than a little awkward admitting it to her.

I exhaled heavily and turned back to Jaromir, a small smile sneaking out at the boy. The streams of smoke were gone, replaced by tiny, little rings he had somehow figured out how to conjure all on his own.

“He figured out about my relationship to Edmund and what we are really training him for.” My voice was dead.

I heard her exhale beside me, her own frustrations rattling through the red-tinged air.

“I guess that would be marathon. What did you end up telling him?”

“The truth.”

“The truth?” She was frustrated, and I didn’t blame her.

My focus snapped to her at the panic in her voice, not surprised to see the aggravation that normally came before some kind of reprimand. Even if we were crushing on each other, she couldn’t let that side of her go all the way. I didn’t blame her.

“Calm down, Risha.” I was careful to keep the irritation out of my voice, but she fumed more. “I didn’t tell him anything. He had already figured it all out himself.”

“So much for shielding him.”

“That’s the thing, though,” I sighed, scooting a tiny bit closer to her as I lowered my voice, careful to keep him from overhearing.

She leaned forward, and my brain tried to melt out of my ears again.

Keep it together, Ry, I ordered. It was becoming my mantra around her.

“He doesn’t want to be shielded, Risha. He wants to be prepared.”

She was obviously expecting something else. Her eyes widened with a little headshake, and then she pulled away from me a bit in shock.

Chuckling deeply at her reaction, I scooted away a bit, desperate to get some fresh air instead of that deep perfume she always wore.

It did, anyway, not that I minded.

“So he wants to know?”

“Every word.”

“Do you think he’s ready?” she asked me curiously, her eyes full of the same sparkle I had seen on the very first day.

“Why are you asking me?”

“Well, it’s like before … You aren’t his friend. You can’t be. But you are something, a guardian, maybe. Something like that. It seems like a decision such as that would be up to you. I mean, he can’t have a government raising him.”

“Don’t you think I’m a little young for that?” My voice was shaking violently, but I didn’t even try to conceal it. I wasn’t too happy with the sudden turn this conversation had taken.