Cast in Honor (Chronicles of Elantra, #11)(41)

“It was six months before the Aerian Hawks would talk much to me, but the force is comprised of more than the Aerians. Caitlin took me under her wing. You’ll have some experience with that. I didn’t expect the rest of the mortals—or the Barrani—to treat me any differently, which is probably why they were comfortable with me. The rest of the Hawks eventually understood that I was in it for the long haul and that—birth aside—I could do my job.

“They stopped seeing the spots on my wings. So, for the most part, did I. It was very liberating. My injuries,” she said, voice dropping, “reminded them. Reminded all of us. I am expected to quit the force. Reparations have been demanded from the Hawklord.”

“Good luck with that.”

“They’ve been demanded through the Emperor; the castelord has spoken with him personally.”

“And he’s not a pile of feathered ash?”

Moran’s smile was grim. “The castelord and the Dragon Emperor both understand when a polite and perfectly civil request is a demand or a threat. The actual words are almost irrelevant, since neither will use open insults.

“I have not endorsed these demands. Nor have I tendered my resignation. The Hawklord has not relieved me of my duties. If I return home with the intent to continue to serve the Halls of Law, I will be forced to arrive at the Halls on my own.”

“But you can’t fly.”

“No. The Aerian Hawks have offered to aid me—but if I accept that offer, they will suffer. Not in the Halls, of course. But they don’t live in the Halls. They live in the Southern Reach.”

“So you chose to stay in the infirmary.”

“Yes. It’s my last act of defiance.” She exhaled. “Understand that if I stay here, I am Moran while I’m under this roof. I am only a sergeant while I’m in the Halls of Law.”

Kaylin nodded.

Teela, however, snorted. “Kaylin has never been particularly good at remembering to follow correct form. Don’t expect her to change; it’ll only lead to disappointment.”

“Sergeant Kassan has never set a good example for her.”

“Not really, no. I admit the Barrani have been somewhat lax about rank differentiation, as well. Kitling, don’t make that face.”

The face in question was not her usual grimace, though. “I really, really want you to stay here.”

“Did you not just say you would give me a few days to think it over?”

“No. I said I could try. You’re going to leave, aren’t you? You’re planning to go back to the infirmary. Could you at least stay here for the night? You’re tired, you’ve just eaten and we have the room.”

“Is she always like this?” Moran asked Helen.

“I believe you already know the answer,” Helen replied. She was smiling. “Farther into your suite of rooms, you will find warmer water. Your wings are stiff.”

Moran exhaled. “Yes, Kaylin. I will stay for tonight.”

“Good.” Kaylin did not clap her hands, because she was not four years old. But she had to remind herself of this fact. “You’re looking kind of green.” At Teela’s pointed side-eye, she added, “What? She is. I’m not making it up.”

*

When Moran left the room, Bellusdeo, who had been silent throughout their exchange, turned to Kaylin. “You don’t intend to enter the fiefs with Annarion, do you?”

“There is no way you are going with us,” Kaylin replied. This had been her only lingering fear.

Bellusdeo folded her arms.

“That doesn’t work on me. I have a Leontine regularly threatening to rip out my throat, remember?”

The gold Dragon exhaled smoke.

“...And Helen won’t let you breathe on me, anyway.”

“I try to stay out of personal matters,” Helen told her. “It never ends well when an outsider joins a family argument.”

“We’re not going to war,” Kaylin gamely continued. “We don’t intend to fight Shadow. We’re not going to Ravellon.”

“After what Gilbert said to you, I don’t believe you.”

“The Emperor will have my head.” It was the wrong thing to say, but it was also true. “If I get lost in the Shadows, I’m one Hawk. The future of an entire race is not depending on me. If you get lost...”

For a being that could naturally breathe fire, Bellusdeo had a lot of ice in her expression.

“We will keep Kaylin safe,” Annarion said, entering the room. It seemed suspiciously like he’d heard the entire conversation. “The familiar will accompany us to the fiefs. He is more easily capable of living across planes and existing in some form on many of them simultaneously. I wouldn’t ask Kaylin to accompany us, but she is his anchor—and to keep the rest of the city safe, we need him.

“I would not go at all if it were a choice between my brother and the Lady.”

Kaylin was confused for a moment—the mention of the Lady made no sense.

Bellusdeo didn’t have any problem making the connection. “I am not the Lady. I am not the Consort. I am—”

“You represent exactly that to the Emperor and the Dragon Court. Under no circumstance would an attempt to save a Barrani Lord—any Barrani Lord—be worth risking your life. Just as it wouldn’t be worth risking the Barrani Consort’s.”