The Guest List(22)

‘Anyway,’ I say, ‘it’ll make a nice change from chicken nuggets, which I seem to end up eating every other night with the kids.’

‘Do you have any good restaurants in Brighton, these days?’ Jules asks. Jules always acts like Brighton is the sticks.

‘Yes,’ I say, ‘there are—’

‘Except we never go to them,’ Charlie says.

‘That’s not true,’ I say. ‘We went to that new Italian place …’

‘It’s not new now,’ Charlie counters. ‘That was about a year ago.’

He’s right. I can’t think of the last time we ate out, other than that. Money has been a bit tight and you have to add the cost of a babysitter on top of the meal. But I wish he hadn’t said it.

Johnno tries to top up Charlie’s champagne and Charlie quickly puts his hand over his glass. ‘No thanks.’

‘Oh come on, mate,’ Johnno says. ‘Night before the wedding. Got to get a little loose.’

‘Come on!’ Duncan chides. ‘It’s only bubbly, not crack. Or are you going to tell us you’re pregnant?’

The other ushers snigger.

‘No,’ Charlie says again, tightly. ‘I’m taking it easy tonight.’ I can tell he’s embarrassed saying it. But I’m glad he hasn’t forgotten himself on this front.

‘So Charlie boy,’ Johnno says, ‘tell us. How did you two first meet?’

I think at first he means Charlie and I. Then I realise he’s looking between Charlie and Jules. Right.

‘A millions years ago …’ Jules says. She and Charlie raise their eyebrows at each other in perfect unison.

‘I taught her to sail,’ Charlie says. ‘I lived in Cornwall. It was my summer job.’

‘And my dad has a house there,’ Jules says. ‘I hoped if I learnt he might take me out on his boat with him. But it turns out taking your sixteen-year-old daughter for a sail along the South coast wasn’t quite the same as having your latest girlfriend sunbathe on the prow in St Tropez.’ It comes out more bitterly than I think she might have intended. ‘Anyway,’ she says. ‘Charlie was my instructor.’ She looks at him. ‘I had a big crush on him.’

Charlie smiles back at her. I laugh along with the others but I’m not really feeling it. It’s hardly the first time I’ve heard this story. It’s like a double act they do together. The local boy and the posh girl. Still, my stomach twists as Jules continues.

‘You were mainly concerned with trying to sleep with as many girls of your own age as possible before you went to uni,’ Jules says to Charlie. It’s suddenly like she’s speaking only to him. ‘It seemed to work for you, though. That permanent tan and the body you had back then probably helped—’

‘Yes,’ Charlie says. ‘Best body of my life. It was like having a gym membership with the job, working out on the water every day. Sadly you don’t get quite as ripped teaching Geography to fifteen-year-olds.’

‘Let’s have a look at those abs now,’ Duncan says, leaning forward and grabbing the bottom of Charlie’s shirt. He lifts the hem to show a few inches of pale, soft stomach. Charlie steps back, reddening, tucks himself in.

‘And he seemed so grown-up,’ Jules says, heedless of the interruption. She touches Charlie’s arm, proprietary. ‘When you’re sixteen, eighteen seems so much older. I was shy.’

‘That’s hard to believe,’ Johnno mumbles.

Jules ignores him. ‘But I know at first you thought I was this stuck-up princess.’

‘Which was probably true,’ Charlie says, raising an eyebrow, getting back into his stride.

Jules flicks him with champagne from her glass. ‘Oi!’

They’re flirting. There’s no other word for it.

‘But no, I realised you were actually quite cool in the end,’ he says. ‘Discovered that wicked sense of humour.’

‘And then I suppose we just stayed in touch,’ Jules says.

‘Mobiles had started to become a thing,’ Charlie says.

‘You were the shy one the next year,’ Jules said. ‘I’d finally got some boobs. I remember seeing you do a double-take when I walked down the jetty.’

I take a big swig of my champagne. I remind myself that they were teenagers. That I am feeling envious of a seventeen-year-old who no longer exists.

‘Yeah and you had that boyfriend and everything,’ Charlie says. ‘He wasn’t my biggest fan.’

‘Yes,’ Jules says, with a secretive smile. ‘He didn’t last very long. He was very jealous.’

‘So did you ever fuck?’ Johnno asks. And just like that: it’s the question I’ve never been able to ask outright.

The ushers are delighted. ‘He went there!’ they cry. ‘Holy shit!’ They crowd in, excited, gleeful, the circle growing tighter. Maybe that’s why I’m suddenly finding it harder to breathe.

‘Johnno!’ Jules says. ‘Do you mind? This is my wedding!’ But she hasn’t said they didn’t.

I can’t look at Charlie. I don’t want to know.

Then, thank God, there’s an interruption: a big bang. Duncan has opened the bottle of champagne he’s been holding.