Monster Nation(40)

'How do you know that?' Nilla demanded. The bear's life energy was flickering out. She felt a pang of guilt like a rippling in her stomach muscles but'hey. Stomach muscles. She look down and saw the four deep gashes there where the bear hit her first.

'I know many things. I know some English, now. Before, chan fhaigh mi lorg air na facail!' He grinned sheepishly. 'Sometimes I slip back. I know you. I understand hunger, but do not know it. I talk to dead, you see. I learn.'

Nilla frowned. 'What are you? I know you're not really here. I thought before you were a hallucination. You aren't though. You're real.'

He ignored her. 'I know what you are. You are shadow, like so many shadows. Different, though. Like fires in a longhouse, except' this one, it goes out. Covered fire. Then it comes back. Know it is you. Sometimes no fire is better signal than fire, yes? You are stronger, and you are smarter than the rest. I must use you.'

'What are you talking about?'

'A job, for you. A cam-borraig. Work. Purpose. You want something more than that?'

'What kind of job?' She brushed hair out of her eyes.

He smiled. 'Be yourself.'

She opened her mouth to speak then closed it again with a click. 'Be myself.'

'Be the darkness. Be a shadow. You first come east, come to me. To my body. It is is, is in some place of high towers and broad flat canyons. We talk there. No live things, though. No more of the living. They are not allies. They are food for you.'

Nilla shook her head, confused. 'What? I'what?' She thought of Charles and Shar'and everyone else who had stared at her, condemned her, hated her. She didn't like where the thought headed (into her teeth) so she threw it away. 'I need them. I can't drive. I don't remember how.'

'Then you walk to me.'

The bear died. She made no death rattle, nor did she go into convulsions. She simply flickered out, the last of her vital fire gone. Darkness began to fill her up instantly. There was no transitional zone, it seemed, between life and death, or at least between life and undeath. It was a change of state, not form.

Nilla pulled her hair back in a ponytail but had nothing to tie it with so she just held it. It felt less greasy than before, strangely enough. It had more body, too. That was weird but she had no time to consider it. 'Screw this. I don't need a job, guy. What I need is to stay alive. If that means consorting with living people, I don't mind that at all. You want me to walk east, with no idea where I'm going.'

'Yes,' he nodded happily.

'To talk to some guy who doesn't understand English. Or clothing.'

'Yes.'

'And for this I get a sense of purpose.'

'Oh, yes,' he said, and opened his arms as if to embrace her. 'Let us begin.' He bowed and gestured toward the east with one arm. The first pale glow of dawn was surging there. 'You begin, now.'

'No. Not tonight.' She turned on her heel and started walking away, up the slope and back towards the motel. Whatever the future held it started with a shower. She was covered in the bear's lifeblood, thick gobbets of it coagulating on her skin. She could imagine a better time to conduct a job interview. 'When we're talking about full dental and three weeks paid vacation, then you get back to me.'

Behind her she felt the bear stir, her energy smoky and dark. She didn't want to look back and see her own handiwork.

'Very well,' he said to her back, 'I'll give you what you want, though is fhasa deagh ainm a chall na a chosnadh.'

'What the hell does that mean?'

'You drive a hard bargain, but it may be worthy. Lass, you come east, to my body, and I'll tell you the name you've lost.'

He was gone when she turned to look. Only the bear remained, inching her way up the slope toward her interrupted meal. The look of recognition on her face was gone. Nilla saw nothing there but hunger.





Monster Nation





Chapter Ten


KNOW THE SYMPTOMS OF CHOLERA! Diarrhea. Abdominal cramps. Nausea and Vomiting. Dehydration. [Hospital Bulletin published by the Centers for Disease Control, 4/1/05]

'I don't see enough lights down there. It's only what, 2200 hours? There should be lights on, people should be watching primetime television. Get us closer and hit that target with the main light,' Clark said over the headset built into his helmet. He couldn't hear himself think over the noise of the helicopter's engines.