Forbidden Honor (Dragon Royals #1)(14)

I resisted the temptation to stick my tongue out at him again and instead grabbed my mop and bucket. The dirty water in the bucket sloshed and the bucket bumped my legs as I headed for the servants’ stairs at the far end of the hall.

“If you’re going to run away, run far.”

I turned around, but he was gone. I wasn’t sure if I’d even heard him correctly.

But I still shivered as I headed down the stairs.

I wasn’t going to run, but maybe I should.





Honor

That night, Hanna was waiting in one of the trees along the walkway again when I returned home. She dropped down beside me, silent as a shadow.

“Where were you last night?” she asked, her voice teasing. “Do you have a beau?”

I laughed. “No.”

“Are you a virgin?”

“Hanna.”

“Because being twenty-two and a virgin seems like a waste.”

“First of all, wrong. Doing what you want is never a waste, whether that means wild, wanton sexcapades, or saving yourself for true love.”

“Thanks for the lecture.” She held her hands up to placate me.

“Second of all, I’m not discussing my sex life—”

“Or lack thereof.”

“…With a twelve-year-old, thank you.”

“Alis waited for you for dinner.” She sounded skeptical at the thought. “She has guests.”

I groaned. She expected me to appear. Usually, she was happy to pretend I didn’t exist as much as possible. She’d even replaced the staff; the servants I’d grown up with had disappeared since Father died. They would’ve made sure I had something for breakfast instead of playing her silly games with blank smiles etched across their faces.

“Why?” I asked.

“I don’t know.” She was silent for a moment, then said, “I think she has a beau.”

“Oh good lord. I guess there’s someone for everyone, even the monsters.” Our stepmother was very pretty. Even nature lied sometimes. “I’m too tired for this.”

“Up all night?” Her eyebrows lifted.

“Hanna. No.”

“Then why are you tired?”

“I took an extra shift at the academy. They had one of their big parties.”

She sighed. “I’d love to go.”

“Someday,” I said lightly. I didn’t want to discuss how my sister would be welcome to blend with the wealthy high-born visiting the academy for balls, even though I never would again. My status as an adoptee in our twisted little world meant that I’d never count to most of these people. Our father had forced them to pretend they accepted me, but he was powerless in the grave. “The balls are more boring than you’d think.”

“Not the balls,” she scoffed. “Please. The academy.”

An instant wave of unease swept over me, as if one of the Scourge was about to hop over the walls around the mansion and try to rip our heads off. “Absolutely not. You want to train to fight the Scourge? I’m pretty sure there are better things you can do with your life than face down braindead killing machines.”

“If these braindead killing machines are wearing fancy gowns, you just described the girls that Stepmother wants me to be friends with.”

“I had some of those friends too when I was your age.” I thought of the girls who’d glanced me over with visible disdain on their faces the night before, then of Calla and June and Lana waking me this morning. “It’s gotten a lot better since. You can’t give up on finding your people.”

“I don’t want to give up on finding my people, but so far, they appear to be in deep hiding. I’m not sure I have any people.” She kicked a rose bush lightly with the toe of her slipper; her people were not hiding under the leaves.

I tried to think of something comforting to say, but I remembered what it had been like to be that kind of lonely, and I didn’t remember anything anyone ever said that would’ve made it better. My loneliness had softened once I went to boarding school. I could fix this for Hanna if only I could earn the money for her tuition.

The memory of last night’s dalliance with Talisyn swept over me, and with it a mix of both lust and shame. I’d keep my head down and keep working at the academy. No more royals.

“Why are you going all red?” Hanna blurted out.

“No reason. But also, if you’re trying to find your people, you might want to resist the temptation to ask awkward questions.”

“My people are going to be thick-skinned.”

“Your people are probably going to be awkward as you are,” I corrected.

She considered that. “Fair.”

I could tell she had follow-on questions about my reaction, but we’d just reached the house. Hanna reached for my hand, and I wrapped my fingers around hers. It reminded me of all the times when she’d been truly a child that we’d walked hand-in-hand. It reminded me of how we’d stood together at our father’s grave, with Alis on the other side, dabbing at her dry eyes. And it reminded me that I could do anything for Hanna.

When we walked in, Alis favored me with a cold smile. “Honor. So glad you’re finally home. I wondered when you didn’t come home last night.”