Boring Girls(64)

“Probably their friends,” Socks said. “Same guys from the Toe.”

I noticed a few people in the crowd laughing at the pro-ceedings, which made me smile. Morons. They thought they were better than us, and it was vindicating to see that we weren’t the only ones who thought they sucked. It would have been nice to land this gig, opening for Gurgol. It would have been a good opportunity for us, especially because of Marie-Lise. If the crowd was into her being in the band, maybe they’d be into our band too.

Heathenistic Bile finished their last few songs, and the crowd halfheartedly cheered them offstage. Immediately the vibe in the room picked up. Gurgol was next.

We all hung out chatting a bit while we waited, and Craig came up beside me. I’d seen him around school, but I hadn’t been thinking about him or boyfriends or school — or anything, really, except the band.

“How have you been?” he said.

“Fine. You?”

“Oh, busy with school and shit like that. I totally want to come out to your next show.”

The last time I had really talked to Craig was the day he’d given me Heathenistic Bile’s CD. “So, those guys are your friends, eh?” I said, gesturing to the stage.

He blushed a little. “Yeah, kinda. I mean, I know they aren’t very good, but you know, at least they’re nice guys.”

“Not really,” I corrected him. “In fact, Paul is a complete *.”

“Well, he’s always been pretty cool to me,” Craig said, then frowned. “Sorry about that. You know, I mean, sometimes people put on an act, right? I guess Paul’s trying to act like a tough guy in his band.”

“Paul’s band isn’t big enough for him to warrant putting on any kind of act,” I said. “His twenty fans are his friends. And since when does an ‘act’ mean treating people in other bands like shit?”

“Whoa, okay. Let’s not talk about Paul anymore. I’m not trying to piss you off. Actually I wanted to ask you a question.”

I could tell by the way he was gazing at me that it was going to be some kind of soppy, romantic thing. “What question?”

“Just, maybe, did you want to go out to eat or something sometime? Or, like, to a movie?” His eyes searched my face nervously.

In that moment, I felt the power shift between us. When I had met Craig, I’d thought he was cute, and he’d humiliated me. Since then, the few times I’d seen him, he’d either said stupid shit or just faded into the background for me. But still, he’d always had that moment when we’d met. He’d still won. And in this moment, it changed. Going out to see some boring movie with Craig was the absolute last thing I wanted to do. And now I was in control.

“No,” I replied.

He stood there, staring at me for a minute, waiting for me to continue. When I didn’t, he faltered. “Oh, er — do you have a boyfriend or something?”

“Nope. I just don’t want to.” I stared back at him. It really was that simple. Was he looking for me to offer some sort of excuse? Is that what I was supposed to do?

“Well, don’t worry about it, then,” he fumbled. “Don’t worry about it.” He went away from me then, back to stand next to Edgar, and I shrugged. If I hadn’t been good enough for Craig last year, he wasn’t good enough for me now. And I had far more important things to focus on than going to a movie with some guy.

The lights went down, the crowd roared deafeningly, and one by one, the members of Gurgol came out onstage as a garbled music-box melody played. First the drummer, then the guitar player. As each guy emerged, the crowd freaked out even more. Next, Marie-Lise came out — absolutely glowing in a white slip-dress and white boots. She’d curled her hair and it bounced in long ringlets tied on either side of her head with black ribbons. Her mouth was a slash of red lipstick, her eyes hollowed out with black. She looked a far cry from the girl in jeans drinking coffee in the sun that morning. The crowd screamed for her. She smiled prettily and picked up her bass, taking her place on the stage.

Finally, Josh Galligan, the singer, came out and grabbed his guitar. The crowd bellowed. They started to play.

I looked over at Fern. Her eyes were riveted to Marie-Lise. I smiled.

The show was amazing. I admit I really only watched Marie-Lise. She had her whole deal down perfectly — moving forward to the crowd, twirling away from the outstretched hands. Part of me wanted to try to get to the front of the crowd to be near her, but it was so packed I knew I wouldn’t be able to get close. Craig and Socks went to the mosh pit, but I stayed back with the others. It was nice being able to see the whole stage from where we stood.