ASBO: A Novel of Extreme Terror(8)

Not wanting to add needlessly to the washing pile, Andrew gathered his clothes off the bathroom floor and decided to put them back on again. The jeans were comfortable and would be fine for sitting and watching a film. Perhaps he would get into pyjamas later, after dinner.

The plush carpet of the landing felt good beneath Andrew’s feet. He padded towards the stairs and started down them. As he neared the bottom, he could hear the loud blaring of the television from the living room. For some reason, his daughter was unable to enjoy anything that didn’t carry the risk of hearing damage.

Andrew reached the downstairs hallway and was just about to enter the living room.

There was a knock at the door.

The Chinese is here.

Andrew changed direction and headed for the porch. He tried to make out the figure through the glass door-panes, but it was too dark outside to see anything more than a silhouette.

Andrew opened the door.

Nobody was there.

Andrew stared out into the darkness, straining his eyes for shapes in the shadows. All of the light was behind him, in the porch, making the darkness in front of him deep and unending. He leant forward and focused his eye, but still he could see no one. He started to think for a mument that he’d just imagined the knock at the door.

“Alright, mate?”

Andrew jumped back as a figure appeared from behind the left side-wall of the porch and entered the bleeding patch of light from the hallway. It was Frankie.

Andrew’s eyes narrowed. “What the hell do you want?”

“Chill out,” Frankie replied, face twitching, scarred mouth grinning. “No need to shit your pants. I came to apologise, innit.”

Andrew’s eyes narrowed further. “What?”

Frankie moved forward and placed a foot onto the step of the front door. Andrew moved forward to meet him.

“I said I’ve come to apologise.” Frankie lifted the brow of his red beanie hat in a way that was almost gentlemanly, “About tonight’s earlier…misunderstanding.”

Andrew laughed. “You mean when you assaulted me for no good reason?”

Frankie laughed back. “Yeah, I guess you could put it like that. No reason we can’t be friends, though. You and me, we can be bros, innit.”

“We’ll never be friends,” said Andrew, “and I already have a brother somewhere, so get the hell off my property and clear off.”

Frankie’s smile left his face and his twitch seemed to get worse for a mument. “Careful, mate. I don’t appreciate being told what to do, you get me?”

Andrew shook his head. “Look, what do you want? I’ve done nothing to you.”

“I know,” Frankie agreed. “Which is why I’m going to allow you to make peace.”

“Make peace! I didn’t do anything to breach the peace.”

Frankie sighed. “You going to f*ckin’ listen to me, mate, or am I going to have to drop you again?”

“How dare you threaten me in my own home.”

“Fuck your home. This whole f*ckin’ neighbourhood is mine. You want to be left alone; you do what the f*ck I tell you. Give me your trainers.”

Andrew was taken aback. “Sorry?”

Give me them sweet-ass Nikes and you’ll be left alone.”

“Fuck you!”

Frankie grabbed Andrew around the throat and sneered. Andrew struggled back and managed to escape the grip, but his heart was racing.

“Do you want to die?” asked Frankie.

Andrew shook his head in disbelief. “You’re insane.”

“Damn straight. I’ll cut you up and snort your f*cking remains if I feel like it. Question is: are you going to behave and do as you’re told, or do I have to show you just how f*ckin’ crazy I am?”

Andrew went to reply but was interrupted.

“Who’s at the door, Andrew?” It was Pen shouting from the living room.

Frankie smirked. He pulled something from his pocket. The object glinted in the light of the porch and Andrew knew it was a knife.

“No one,” said Andrew. “I-I’ll just be a minute.”

Frankie put the knife back in his pocket.

“I thought maybe it was the Chinese.”

“No,” Andrew shouted back. “I’ll let you know when it’s here.”

“Going to have a nice dinner with the missus?” Frankie asked. “You go off the idea of chips then?” He took another step forward, half-inside the doorway now. “Maybe I should join you all? Always nice to know the neighbours. Say, don’t you have a fine-ass daughter I’ve seen around here?”