Wrong About the Guy(57)

“I’m not saying that.”

“Michael’s Luke’s best friend. He’s like my uncle.”

He held his hands out and said simply, “I do love him, you know. He’s my dad. It kills me that I’ve hurt him this much. But I don’t know what to do about it.”

I relented. He was my friend and he was in pain. “You can stay here until you figure it out.”

“Don’t tell Luke or your mom, okay? You can say my dad and I had a fight, but don’t tell them about Crystal and me. Please?”

I wasn’t crazy about hiding things from them, but I also wanted to respect Michael’s privacy and let him decide whether or not he wanted to tell his friends, so I agreed.





twenty-seven


I put Aaron in Jacob’s room for the night. (Grandma was in the guest room near me, and the other guest room was downstairs, which felt too far away.) “There are teddy bears,” I pointed out. “Feel free to hold one if it will help get you through the night.”

“I will.” He soberly picked out a chubby little blue guy from the pile of stuffed animals and clutched it against his chest. “Thanks, Ellie. You’re a good friend.”

I said good night, but I couldn’t fall asleep for a long time. I was too freaked out, not only by what Aaron had told me, but also by my own stupidity. I’d misread every signal he’d sent me over the past couple of months. All he had wanted to do was confide in me about this ridiculous affair he was having, but I’d assumed the big secret was that he was in love with me. God, I was an idiot. And a narcissist.

At least no one knew. That was the one thing that made it endurable: I’d kept my assumptions to myself. It was an argument for never telling anyone anything ever.

If only that were a viable way to live one’s life.

I was also relieved that Heather hadn’t ever come on too strong with him. She didn’t have anything to be publicly embarrassed about either. I felt bad though. I never should have encouraged her to like him. But at least he didn’t know she did, and I’d tell her the truth about him and Crystal as soon as possible—I had promised not to tell Mom and Luke, but I hadn’t promised not to tell her. She might be disappointed but it was no huge tragedy—they’d never even kissed.

I fell asleep eventually, and woke up early the next morning to the terrifying sight of Grandma’s face near mine. “There’s someone moving around in Jacob’s room!” she hissed in my ear, and I sat up with my heart pounding before I remembered that I knew who was in there.

I explained the bare minimum—that Aaron had come over and we’d talked until it had gotten so late that he’d just stayed over.

“I don’t know if your mother would approve of boys sleeping over on school nights,” Grandma said.

“Which part is the problem?” I asked. “The boy part or the school-night part?”

“You tell me,” she said with a broad wink.

“Aaron and I are just friends. Really.” There were few things I could say with as much sincerity and certainty.

“Well, at least you put him in a different room.” She winked conspiratorially. “I don’t think I have to tell your mother about this.” Then she went downstairs to scramble some eggs before Aaron and I left for school.

I never ate much in the morning—I just wasn’t all that hungry—but for her sake I forced down a couple of forkfuls before I pleaded lack of time and raced out the door. Aaron didn’t even pretend to eat anything, just told Grandma he was sorry but he couldn’t face any food right then. He looked pretty exhausted, and I doubted he had slept much, if at all. He promised to let me know what his plans were later that day, and then we took off in our separate cars to go to our separate schools.


I ran into Ben on the way to my car at the end of the day. We were talking about whether we should cap the amount people could spend on gifts for the holiday donations, when Arianna appeared and pounced on us.

“You look so cute!” she said to me, shaking my arm in a friendly way. “I love love that outfit! You have to take me shopping—I’m such a clothing loser.”

“You always look good,” I said.

“That was so much fun the other day,” she said. “Going to your house. It’s such a great house. Ben was just saying we should wrap the donated gifts there.”

“It’s a good location for everyone,” Ben explained.

“Let’s just meet here at school,” I said. “Keep it easy.”

“But then we can’t do it on a weekend,” Arianna said. “And weekdays are so busy. Oh, there’s Lulu! She still has my bio notes—be right back.” She darted off across the parking lot.

I turned to Ben and lowered my voice. “Look, I don’t want to sound mean or anything, but Arianna kind of snooped around my house, taking photos and looking at stuff, and I’d rather she didn’t come over again. It’s fine for just the two of us to meet there, but not if she’s coming. Okay?”

Ben’s jaw tightened. He said icily, “Yeah, okay, whatever. We can just do everything at school from now on.” He took a step away and turned his back on me.

Ugh. I was hoping he would agree that Arianna had been pushy and inappropriate, but I guess he felt some kind of loyalty to her since he’d brought her onto the committee in the first place. Now I wished I hadn’t said anything. I tried to backpedal. “It’s not a big deal or anything.” I forced a smile even though he wasn’t even looking at me. “I mean, maybe she just got lost in the house.” Yeah, so lost she confused upstairs and downstairs. Happens all the time. “But actually it probably is easiest to just meet at school anyway.”