White Stag (Permafrost #1)(62)

My howl isn’t pretend anymore. The thought floated into my head. Neither are my claws.



* * *



WHEN I WOKE for real, it didn’t surprise me that I was wrapped in Soren’s arms. His muscular body pressed against mine, curling protectively around me. The wounds on my ankle from the n?kken had faded, but the lingering smell of brine made acid churn in my stomach.

Soren’s hands were firmly wrapped around my wrists. I noticed red beneath my fingernails. I shifted slightly, my head pressing against Soren’s chest. Where his heart should’ve been, there was a deep indent. In my nightmares there’d been rapid thumping, but it could’ve been the waterfall. Did goblins have normal heartbeats? I didn’t know.

“Janneke.” His hard face relaxed in relief. “It’s over now. It’s over.”

I breathed in his scent of woodsmoke and pine needles. “You know,” I murmured, letting the scent overwhelm me, “you were wrong.”

“What could I possibly be wrong about?” I didn’t see the smile, but I knew it was there, just like I knew there’d be a twinkling light in his eyes.

“You’re not a heartless monster,” I said. “You’re a monster with a heart.”

He laughed.

“Are you all right?” I asked. The sickening smell of dying flesh was gone, though the copper tang of blood was still in the air. With a little bit of maneuvering, my eyes rested on a long, newly formed pink scar on his arm.

“I’m fine,” he said. “You had me worried for a while.” He started to disentangle himself from me, leaving a cold space where his body had been. My body ached with the desire to reach for him, to keep him close.

“What happened to me?”

The answer came from behind me. “N?kkens draw blood to increase the emotional anguish in their victims. Anything that hurts them or makes them feel regret, sorrow, anger, comes out in waves. They feed off those as much as they feed off the love of humans. I should’ve warned you before you dove. I didn’t think the deal would go sour so fast. I apologize.”

Seppo stood a little away from us. The swirls of tattoos around his ears and cheeks glowed dark sapphire in the little light.

“You saved my life,” I said. “You went into the water when you knew it would hurt you, maybe kill you.”

Seppo shrugged. “It’s nothing.”

“It is something,” Soren argued. “Thank you.”

The tips of Seppo’s ears reddened. “Well, if both of you died, then I’d have no one to tell Lydian’s plans to. And then I’d be stuck going against him alone and then probably would die in a horrifying or painful way. Probably both. So, this is a better outcome.”

I stiffened. Seppo had mentioned Lydian’s plan in his list of reasons not to hate him. I grumbled as it dawned on me that now he had another reason—he’d saved my life twice. Being in another’s debt was not something I enjoyed. “All goblins make plans on the Hunt. What makes Lydian any different?”

Seppo looked over his shoulder, back at the churning water. He shuddered and faced us. “All goblins have plans during the Hunt, true. But I don’t think any of them have plans anything like his.”

Soren raised his eyebrows. “And what are they?”

Seppo gulped, and fear glistened in his dark blue eyes. “He wants to kill the stag.”

“Every goblin wants to kill the stag.” Irritation colored Soren’s voice. “I doubt Lydian is different.”

“No,” Seppo said. “You don’t understand. He wants to kill it for good so he can be Erlking for eternity.”





15


LYDIAN’S GAMBIT


THE SILENCE WAS deafening, then Soren stood and paced. He reminded me of an animal trapped in a cage waiting for the correct moment to escape and rip out its captor’s throat. Pacing was not a sign of weakness for him.

“That’s impossible,” I said, trying not to choke on my fear.

“That’s what I thought too,” Seppo said. He looked over his shoulder, back toward the n?kken’s lair. The swirling water was green. “We need to get out of these caverns. I don’t think the n?kken is very happy. Which isn’t a surprise since they’re eternally depressed creatures. But still.”

“That’s what we’ve been trying to do,” Soren grunted. “It’s a maze down here, though, and I’d rather not run into any more dragons.” Fear tinged his voice. I almost laughed. I spent a hundred years thinking nothing frightened this man, but I was wrong.

“Well,” Seppo said, “you two haven’t been scouting this place for days.”

For days? There was no way two groups of goblins had been able to linger in the mountains without detecting one another. The ambushers on the cliffsides must’ve detected Lydian’s group at some point, unless … my stomach turned sour. I’ll kill a thousand little goblin girls if I have to. Lydian’s crazed words now made much more sense.

“You were the ambushers.” I turned on Seppo. “It’s your fault we’re in this mess in the first place!”

Lydian was behind it all along. The mountainside ambush, my subsequent fall, and Rekke’s death were all his fault. The golden-eyed goblin girl should’ve lived. It wasn’t like she would’ve won. She barely had any power, but Lydian gutted her anyway.