Warrior (Relentless #4)(74)

After the third day, people began to say Sara was dead. Wherever I went in town, I could overhear conversations about “that poor girl who drowned.” It angered me every time I heard them talk about her that way, but I couldn’t stop people from talking.

It was a week before her friends gave up hope. I didn’t see much of Roland and Peter after that because Maxwell had them doing extra training. But the few times I saw them it was clear the two of them were grieving.

“Sara’s not coming home,” Nate said.

“Yes, she is. Don’t give up on her.”

“I want to believe that more than anything, but I have to face the truth, and so do you.” He swallowed hard. “Sara is dead. It’s time we both accept it.”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t do that.” As long as the bond was alive, Sara was alive, and I’d search for her forever if that’s what it took.

He sighed wearily and looked down at his clasped hands. “Father Glenn came to see me yesterday. He thinks it’s time we let people say good-bye to Sara. We’re having a memorial service for her tomorrow at St. Patrick’s. I thought you might like to be there.”

I pushed my chair back and strode to the window. My fingers gripped the edge of the countertop as I stared at the waterfront and tried to reign in my emotions. I didn’t know where Sara was, but I knew with absolute certainty she was alive. And no one would ever convince me otherwise.

“You have to let her go. We both do. I don’t know how your people cope with grief, but humans need closure. We say good-bye. Then we try to keep going as best we can.”

When I didn’t respond, he continued. “I know you felt responsible for her, and you blame yourself for what happened. Anyone who’s met you knows you did everything in your power to save her. Sara knows that too.”

The countertop creaked under my fingers, and I released it before I accidentally pulled it from the wall. Turning, I met Nate’s agonized gaze. I didn’t want to add to his pain, but I would never accept that Sara was gone forever. My heart would stop beating before I gave up on her.

“I understand why you need to have the service, but I won’t be there.” My voice was steady, revealing nothing of the storm raging inside me. I walked past him and stopped in the kitchen doorway. “I’m sorry.”

I left the apartment and strode back to my hotel where my bike was parked. A few minutes later, I rode past Nate’s, heading out of town.

Passing the marina, I spotted the large yacht still moored at the end of the main dock. After Sara disappeared, Roland told us the two of them had narrowly escaped Haism’s men and the Hale witch at the marina the night of the storm. They’d gone there to meet her buyer, Malloy, and the men had come after them. He and Sara had escaped by jumping off a boat and hiding under the pier. Roland said he and Sara had honestly believed those men were after Malloy and that they’d just gotten caught up in his trouble.

Chris and I had scoured every inch of al-Hawwash’s yacht for clues, anything that would lead us to Sara. Tristan had sent people to go through the sheik’s house in Portland, along with many of his other holdings around the world. Tristan believed the sheik had Sara stashed away somewhere, and he had Yusri al-Hawwash living under a microscope these days. The sheik couldn’t buy toothpaste without us knowing about it.

I passed the city limit sign, and soon I was on the old mine road. I’d been down this way so many times in the last two weeks that I knew every rock, tree, and bend in the road. I parked in my usual spot and trekked through the woods to the cliff, the last place I’d seen Sara.

When I broke through the trees at the edge of the field, my throat tightened as it did every time I saw the cliff. Memories of that day assailed me, and I relived them all, trying to see what I could have done differently. I’d been through countless battles and I’d never doubted my skills as a warrior. But this one haunted me and left me wondering how I had failed her.

I walked to the edge of the cliff and stared down at the waves pummeling its base. Nate, the werewolves, and the whole town believed Sara had died here, her body swept out to sea. I understood why they’d given up hope; they didn’t have a bond telling them she was still alive.

But even without the bond, I’d find it hard to believe that such a spirited, passionate person, who had survived so much, was gone. She’d tried so hard to go unnoticed, not realizing her inner fire drew people to her like a beacon, just as it had called to me before I knew who or what she was.

And now they wanted to say good-bye to her. Tomorrow her family and friends would gather in their church to sing sad hymns and pray for her immortal soul. I couldn’t do that, not for Nate or anyone else. It would be a betrayal of the person who I knew was still alive out there, lost and waiting to be found.

“Where are you, Sara?” I asked for what felt like the thousandth time.

For the thousandth time, there was no answer.





*


Organ music spilled from the open double doors of the church that was filled to overflowing. At least a dozen men stood on the steps because there was no room for them inside. The music stopped and the priest began to speak again, his deep voice amplified by the microphone he was using.

I stood across the street from the church but close enough for my enhanced hearing to pick up the priest’s words.