Trail of Lightning (The Sixth World #1)(37)

“I find a gun works pretty well too.”

A moment when he holds my gaze. Then he laughs. “You’re a hard woman, Mags,” he acknowledges. “No offense, because I like you. And I’d like to get to know you. But I don’t think many friendships are fomented at the end of the barrel of a gun.”

“Says who?”

He laughs again, and it feels good. Sounds good. To have him here. I wouldn’t have made it through this encounter with Ma’ii so smoothly without him.

Distant barking makes me raise my head, and I grin. “My dogs are back.”

“Where did they go?”

“Don’t know, but they always take off when Ma’ii shows up. Must be a canine thing.” I stand up and stretch, a yawn cracking open my jaw. “C’mon. I’ll introduce you. You can help me feed them, and then I’ll show you where you can sleep.”

“You mean I’m not sleeping with you?”

He says it like a joke, but I freeze, caught completely off guard. My brain tells me it’s an innocent comment, a flirtation, and I should have seen it coming after all of Ma’ii’s earlier taunts about Kai being my new lover and Tah’s unsubtle matchmaking. I know I’m supposed to flirt back or laugh it off and tell him not to push his welcome, but I can’t make the words come out of my mouth.

Kai must notice, because he immediately backpedals. “Kidding. I’m kidding. I just thought, since you invited me back to your place . . .” He hesitates. “I’ll sleep in here. It’s fine. Couch looks fine.”

I can’t think of what to say. How to explain. I look over at him. The long lean frame, the rakish hair and disarming smile. I bet most girls don’t say no to that. Why would they? And I can’t deny that the idea is tempting. Kai could be something easy and uncomplicated. Somebody warm and willing to chase away the bad memories. Someone not Neizghání.

The truth is that Kai may be what I need, but he’s not who I want.

“It’s not like that, Kai.”

He’s quiet for a moment before he says, “It could be. Me and you, I mean. For tonight at least. If you want it to be. No strings. Just . . . fun.”

“I . . . I have someone. Someone I . . .” I can feel his eyes on me, the question there. If I have someone, where is he? He heard Ma’ii talking about Neizghání. He probably thinks I’m delusional, just like Ma’ii does. But the hope is all I have.

I gesture to the trunk that serves as my side table. “Blankets are in there. Help yourself.”

“Can I ask you one thing?” he says quickly, before I can escape. “You said I could. Ask you, I mean.”

I did, but now I’m not so sure. “Ask.”

“Why do you put up with him?”

At first I think he’s talking about Neizghání, but then I realize he must mean Ma’ii. “He’s not so bad, like you said. You just have to know what to expect.”

“And what do you expect?”

“All that talk about friendship isn’t real for him. I mean, Ma’ii’s an opportunist. He’s good as long as our interests are the same, but if he sees the chance, he’ll turn on you without a second thought.”

“But you value friendship, don’t you?”

“Sure.”

“So maybe we could be friends,” he offers. “Just friends, I mean,” he adds hastily when he sees my look. “If you want.”

For a split second I can’t think of a thing to say. It’s the last thing I expected, and I don’t have an answer for him. I can see him open his mouth like he’s going to take it back, and I don’t want him to. But I don’t know how to stop him either.

A loud bang at the door that makes us both jump, immediately followed by a low whine that is distinctly doggie. The tension in the room breaks and we’re both saved from saying anything at all.

Kai laughs quietly. Scrubs both hands over his face and up through his hair. He opens his mouth like he’s going to say more about it, but then he changes his mind and says, “Well, this is sort of awkward.” He looks around the room, a little defeated-looking. “Don’t suppose you have anything to drink? Whiskey, the local home brew? I’m not picky.”

I want to tell him we could be friends, but instead I say, “Any alcohol I have goes into the truck.”

“Right.” He lets out a gusty sigh and heaves himself up out of the chair. “What about those batteries? We never looked for those.”

“There’s a junk drawer in the kitchen.”

He drops his chin to his chest, like there’s a weight around his neck, something heavy but invisible, and nods. “And then I think I’ll call it a night. That okay?”

I shrug, my arms folded tight over my chest.

He wanders back toward the kitchen. I watch him until he disappears behind the swinging door. Wonder for a moment if I made the right choice about him tonight. Wonder if I made the right choice about anything tonight. Then I let it go. Haul myself up off the wall to feed my dogs.

By the time I come back, Kai has cleaned up the dinner bowls and, true to his word, is curled up on the sofa under one of my spare blankets. His back is to me and all I can see is the shape of his shoulders, the dark mess of his hair. I don’t know if he’s already asleep, but he’s silent and I don’t see any batteries out on the coffee table, so I drop the tote bag by the door and take the hint. I lock the front door and turn off all the lights.